Sorry friends for not responding back about the meeting. I have done so much walking getting the two bedrooms finished my feet are burning up all the time. It is just going to take time to get back to where they were, I hope.
I went in to see Al during his lunch time. I realized that I am going to need a divided plate for him. I am not sure where I can get a hold of one of these that doesn’t look like a toddler’s set.
He does pretty good eating on one of these. He had Strawberry Ice-cream for dessert. He must have been getting tired from the main course because his tremors were keeping him from enjoying the dessert.
He struggled and the scooping of onto his spoon was hard. He was making a mess so I asked him a couple of times if he wanted me to help him. His answer was no. He could do it himself.
I was telling him that I would need to get a wheelchair here at home and he asked why. I said because you use that and your walker here so I assume you will want both at home. I don’t know how I said it wrong but he got instantly confused. It ended up with him in tears and wanting a schedule of when he would use what here at home.
The lady showed up for his outing so instead of dragging out explanations and seeing more confusion I left. The meeting came next. I took that deep breath and said a prayer and walked in. The three top office people were there.
I first explained the lunch experience to show his lack of comprehension when you are explaining something new to him. I also wanted to prove my point that Al doesn’t use me out of pity. If he did he would have taken the help with the ice-cream.
I went on to explain about the cookie ordeal where he ate all those cookies and no one seemed to notice. I discussed the issues of the nurse on duty and the chaos she caused the day of the nose bleed. I even blabbed about the dirty brief under his bed, the urine stained pad on his recliner along with mashed food in it.
I ended up making my final point by stating I had not brought Al there to be fixed. I told them Parkinson broke Al and we can’t fix it. I explained about how I wanted him to be social here but now the staff didn’t seem to have time for him.
I talked about the instability of Parkinson’s Disease to cause Al to go from good to bad and back several times in one day possibly. The more I talked the more they wrote their own notes. I told them all in all I wanted Al to have calmness during his stay there and for him to feel like he was worthy of speaking to. I told them that how the nurse disciplines her tough love in her own home doesn’t concern my brother in a nursing home.
The Social Services lady persisted with her idea of letting her bring a Psychologist in to see Al. I said absolutely not. I won’t go into the long story of why I refused. This would be another post in its own. I will say that I have had him to five professionals, top-notch and not one has been able to crack that hard shell enabling Al to release all the garbage that has been stored for years.
In fact it turns Al into a wild animal in a cage. It is dangerous and everyone loses in the end. She argued her point about antidepressants and I said that his doctors and I have had Al on almost all of them on the market. They actually turn Al worse. More drooling, worse tremors, it just isn’t good.
He does take one now and has been for a bout a year. I am for helping Al to see things more peacefully. But at the same time he takes so many medications that at this point when you add new ones there are severe side-effects. I have to weigh the pros and cons and right now because of past experiences I had to say no. In fact I had to tell her no three times before she gave it up.
She made me feel like a huge sinner. Well of course I do sin but in this case she made me feel bad for not approving her idea. Once again I explained I want him to continue his wheelchair therapy and his heat therapy. I hope that I made myself clear about his room and the verbal ways that Al deserves to be treated.
I came home and did a little more of the putting odds and ends in the right rooms, but I was tired and my feet hurt so bad. I just ended up going to bed and stayed there all evening. Now here it is almost four in the morning and I am writing this post.
- One (drumrollthenovel.wordpress.com)