I walked out of church this morning, confused, and wondering where I had been hiding myself. I heard the sermon, but wasn’t sure if I really heard the sermon. I spent more time looking at the people around me. As I always get there a little early, I had time to scan people as they walked by me, looking at how they were dressed, watching them greet others whom they knew. Watching people catch up with others, sharing what had been going on that week. I felt, all of a sudden, very alone. A part of me wanted to have someone come to me and shake my hand and ask how my week went, but why would I really expect that? I hadn’t gone to this church very long, and I had already made my mind up that I was there for reasons other than myself. I was ashamed. Ashamed, that I lived in a bubble within the four walls of my home. Ashamed that I didn’t make myself get out and give people a chance to get to know me. I heard the last part of the sermon too clear. I didn’t want to hear it, but God, at that moment, made me hear it. It was the final sentence, that stirred me. I was paying attention. The minister asked the congregation, do you trust. Do I trust? Well, now why should I trust. That was a stupid question! All I had to do was go back a few years and see how my extended family had abandoned me after my father’s death. I could go into all sorts of reasons why, but I won’t. I didn’t have many friends. More social friends, but I knew I had one friend that had been there for me for many years. I have another friend who is allowing me to slowly open my heart and let feelings and words come out. God loves me. It doesn’t matter if family left me behind. God loves me for all my faults. I feel that God placed me where I am today, so I can be there for my brother. I have felt at times left out of life, feeling sorry for myself for not having a life like I used to. That one sentence, at the end of the sermon. shook me up. God planned for me to hear it, and he wanted me to think about how I felt about life. I put myself in a position to not praise God for what he is doing with me, but to ponder on what I didn’t have or wanted to change. I needed to walk out of the church confused. It helped me more than anything this week. I am loved. I am worthy. God is good. I have a wonderful life that only God could give. Thank you Lord for saving my soul, thank you Lord for making me whole.Trust? Yes, I trust God. I can do nothing without him
This is my favorite, so far!I am so pleased that the Lord is talking to you and helping you see your life and your mind and that there is hope in your life! That Jesus is with you!
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you have played a part in it also
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Mine, too! I imagine there was no one lonelier than Jesus. Every one of his hand-picked disciples let Him down at one point or another. You can hear the anguish in His cry to His own Father from the cross when God turned His Face away…. He understands exactly what you are going through, and how you have issues with trust. He is right there with you, Terry! Excellent, excellent post!
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thank u so much my friend. your words always mean so much to me
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i do consider u a new friend also!!! lol
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lol..Funny how things work out, huh? Yes, I consider you a new friend for me as well…You’ve always been there to uplift and encourage, and I am amazed at your tender writing…I want you to be happy!
bird
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i have nominated you for an award my friend
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Hi Bird, I have nominated you for three awards
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Wow! Thank you, Terry!
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hope they brighten your day and you enjoy them!
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I was so touched after reading this. You see I know what it is to go to church and feel that everyone is going to run to you like Whit said. But yet, I went to a church and because I was having so much family turmoil and the atmosphere was not the most trusting although very outreaching to me at that time things still did not go right. So one where I reached out and they did not and one where they did but the people around me were untrusting. What do you do? I learned to focus on Christ and that way my vision is not blurred. No matter what you do there is something that will try to come out boldly to try and discourage your progress. I learned to see it and give it straight to Jesus. After all, they are hinderances that he knows exactly how to handle. I find my focus much clearer and I am way more productive despite anything and any obstacle. I use obstacles to my advantage instead of letting that familar here I am again live beyond 1 second.
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thank you so much for sharing with me
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i have nominated you for an award, Thelma!
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Thank you! God knows how to help. Thanks again also for nomination. (comment)
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Thank you! God knows how to help. Thanks again also for nomination. commentor award
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God knows how to help. Thanks again also for nomination. commentor award
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you are so welcome. i love your blog but lost it for awhile. don’t know how but found it again
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God knows how to help. I appreciate award.
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enjoy it Thelma!!!
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HI Thelma, I have nominated you for three awards
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it says u commented, but there was no comment there, so i don’t know what happened or how to reply. sorry
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Hi Terry, Thanks for that heart felt article. It really is hard to trust at times, especially if the people or things we trusted in have let us down. You are so right about trusting in Jesus, on Him we can depend. I have felt lonely before in a church full of people. Even though you are new, you can be the one to reach out to the person sitting by themselves. God Bless You.
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i hate being one who doesn’t trust. it is not of god. i m glad that sermon was given this morning, as i needed to be shaken up a bit. thanks for reading and sharing your thoughts. they mean a lot to me
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i have nominated you for an award, Leon!
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Thank you Terry for your nomination, and for all your support and encouragement!
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you are so welcome. have always enjoyed your blogs
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Terry, what an open and honest post!! I thought it was marvelous 🙂 Thanks for sharing your heart! hugs, Terri
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thank u so much terri for allowing me to share with you.
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