Please Don’t Say The F– Word


She rose and sat up on the edge of her bed, dreading starting the day. She just hated having to go to this place. She had a few hours before she would be sitting face to face with him. Being in the same room with him had never been held dear to her heart. In fact, if her memory served her well, he always left her sitting there feeling awkward and shy. Sometimes he could bring the beast out in her. She tried to prepare herself for their visits. She would walk in THE room, and take a seat. When he came in, she gave him her biggest smile. Somehow hoping that this would stop him from saying  all those words that would sometimes almost bring her to tears. One time she took  a dear friend with her. She knew he would not bring up since sensitive topics in front of guests. You know, this didn’t work either. He just asked her if she wanted to leave or did she feel comfortable eavesdropping in on this personal conversation. She and I looked at each other, neither of us being able to say a word, plastered to our seats, barely breathing. Since no one said anything, or got up to leave the room, he proceeded to go on with his announcements. Afterwards, out in the car, she would comfort me with her words, while I sat there and cried, swearing I would do better before the next time rolled around to see this man. We would drive to our favorite malt shop and splurge with burgers and malts, and talk about everything we had just heard. Eventually, we could both be found laughing so hard, the waitress would come over and see if all was alright . We both would look at her, and just start laughing, saying of course! We were just telling some jokes!. She smiled and went about tending to her customers. No one was going with me today. I stood up from the bed, and  started getting dressed, making sure to wear my most slimmest, looking clothes. I would wear my sandals today, instead of tennis shoes. I wasn’t that hungry, so I made myself two pieces of toast with peanut butter and had my morning java. I went in to my bathroom and looked at myself in the mirror. Wishing I had a magical way of cutting off some of this and that, where ever it was most noticeable. I brushed my teeth and combed my hair. It was time to go. Time to go to

Untidy home office (mine)

Untidy home office (mine) (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

the doctor’s office to get the results of my lab work.. The next words I heard being spoken was “Let’s get your weight”. The day had started.

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