Understanding A Sister’s Love For A Brother

With Al receiving his new Candy Apple Red scooter, I have spent my morning redoing my house to make room. I guess it is officially spring, so I can combine two goals in one. I can sure tell  my body is getting older. Pieces of furniture I used to be able to scoot or sometimes actually pick up, I can no longer do. I use every main muscle to scoot, shove, pant and groan to get it moved one inch. I started with Al’s room, by changing his bed sheets, having him stay in there in case he would like to help, but no help was offered. After changing the sheets, I saw piles of news papers on his bed. I questioned him on why he was saving them in here, and also asked him why I had been noticing that he was taking the papers to his room to read. He had always read them in the living room, but I have noticed he has been giving up his routine of watching his favorite TV shows after supper, taking the newspapers to his room and staying in there. I should have known something was up,but because we have not had some of the issues from years ago, I didn’t put two and two together. One of Al’s mental issues is women and naked women. I understand the whole concept of everything, and also don’t mind if he has a magazine or two in his room for his private times, but he doesn’t do this. As I started going through some partially empty bags and papers, I found that he was hoarding again. He had been saving each newspaper that had a picture of a woman on it. Every ad that was promoting women’s clothing. He had a huge stack, and was hiding them in empty bags, boxes, anything he could find. We have an issue first with his room. His room is very crowded, including walls, floor corners, wall to wall, with his coca cola collection. There is no where else on the walls to even place one nail. I have done my very best to accommodate his wishes on hanging on to each piece of collection, but his room is only so big, so now with saving every paper he can get a hold of and any sacks, boxes, bags, the room is now unsafe, for his unsteadiness. I hated to do it, but with him being in the room, I had to explain that we could not keep this amount of papers, boxes, bags, as it was much more risky for him falling over something. I brought a huge trash bag into his room and making sure he was watching me, I cleaned out the bedroom. Storing some glass items in his boxes, throwing away the papers, and other empty containers. I talked some about how God would feel with him looking at women in an untasteful way. He began to cry and I knew I was hurting his feelings, but sometimes talking to him about God’s wishes is the only way to get him to understand . You may think that I do not understand, or I am being mean. but in earlier postings I have explained the tiny snow flake becoming a huge snow ball with this. It causes him problems with himself, the law, and other people. I have to stop it once again before it grows too large. I have also noticed that when we are all sitting around the camp fires at night, his chatter becomes more adult. I understand that he is trying to fit in and be accepted in his own way, but he will more and more use distasteful language about women’s chests, or use the word freaking, when I know he wants to use the more ugly word.He has been talking about beer and alcohol. I don’t know for sure what is going on, but I do notice it and once again I talked to him about hurting others feelings making comments about their chest, especially when they are sitting right there, and that there is no alcohol allowed in this house, period, so I don’t want to go in that direction with his talk either. Yes, you probably would not enjoy living with me. I try to live with God’s rules and not society’s rules. I never want God to pay me a visit, and see anything here that I would want to run and hide it away from his eyes. Al and I finished his room, and then I tackled the living room. Sweeping, cleaning off window sills, rearranging furniture, so that he can ride his scooter in the house. I am pooped now, so I took the break time to write this blog. I am finishing up laundry and I still have to sweep the rest of the living room and place clean sheets on my bed. I fixed Al’s lunch and am taking a small break.

Last night, I was like a concerned mother hen. Al took his scooter and took off for a ride. He was gone for some time. My mind started to wonder, as I realized he does not know his phone number or address, but I relaxed some when I remembered I had placed this information in his wallet.He was gone for about an hour and did come back. Yes! He was home, back with me again. I was relieved. I asked him if he had a good time, and he nodded yes. I asked him if he missed me, and he smiled and said no. I looked at him and I told him I didn’t miss him either, and then we both laughed because we knew we really did miss each other in just knowing that if help was needed, we each were a hand length away.

A digital picture of a candy apple, taken by Loui Andary, DaemonDivinus 2005-09-24. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)