Together, You And I


Jerry Mathers and Paul Sullivan

Jerry Mathers and Paul Sullivan (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Being a part of the blogging world for nine weeks now has made me see how small most of my problems are in life. I used to think that I had the worst life of anyone. I have a step-sister, that I don’t think I have mentioned, and if I have it is a rare thing. She is totally opposite of me. She was born when I was ten, so there is quite a big difference in age. She is into things I have never been around, and I don’t party, where that is her main life, but she is a half-sister, so she is family. I have read where some of you bloggers also struggle with acceptance and rivalries with siblings also. When I was growing up, I watched the top shows in my life. Leave It To Beaver, I Dream of Jeannie. The corny shows, no swearing, no guns, just comedy, laughter and fun. I knew that this was the kind of life that I wanted to have. I wanted a Leave It To Beaver family. I think I had it for some years when I was first married. The children were born, husband worked at a very respectable job. I was a housewife. I had a best friend that had remained from seventh grade all the way to my ripe old age of 36. I didn’t attend church much. Oh we went sometimes, but mainly when there was a special event, like Mother’s Day dinners, where mom would get tickets and asked my daughter and I to go. I lived in a fairy tale dream. There is no Leave It To Beaver families anymore. If there are, I have not met them. From some of the blogs here, I have discovered that I am not the only one divorced. I have learned that husbands and wives can and do cheat on each other. We are even entertained by obnoxious shows like Jerry Springer, just to help remind us of the craziness we all live in. I hate the show myself, but I will admit, it can be entertaining, and provide a good laugh, if you are having a depressing day. My mother used to tell me that there was no such thing as depression. She said it was not accepting our lives for what they truly are, and wishing for something different. She told me that if I was depressed, I should dig more in my bible, and get my rear end to church. Mom was a strong woman, who lived through her Bible. Her views on life were simple. Believe in God, and all falls into place.The other thing that irritated her was the talk shows where there was always a psychiatrist available. She thought this was a rip-off of people’s monies. She would state to me, if you need help, read your Bible and pray for healing. Today, years later, I realize that she had a solid look at life. Our family was no different from mine now, or yours. We live in different states, have different cultures, causing us to do things a certain way, but, we are very similar. Did I want to be a rich person? No, not really. Food on the table, and bills paid, was always my motto. I see where Donna Summer passed away, and of course it was the same for her as Whitney Houston and all quite a few other rich folks. Money, sex, and drugs. Why in the world would you want to be famous? So you can fit in, be popular, be photographed, live in a mansion. Maybe the cheating attracts them,being needed and desired? Enjoying such a short life, as drugs are introduced, so that you can stay awake during all of your travels, cure insomnia, calm the nerves, and die early? No, I don’t want this life that they have. I don’t care if I am seen on TV or not. They also have the same problems we do, just magnified. I have found a few ladies on the blog site here that I wish were my sisters, for real. Their love of life, compassion for others, the involvements with their children’s lives, is what draws me to them. I have even went to the next step, and have actually spoken to one of these ladies over the telephone now. This puts a closer connection for me now, as there is a reality of the other person being real, not just a blogger. Wouldn’t it be nice if we could pick up the phone and talk to each other also, or does that invade on the privacy issue, for fear if we knew each other through a voice, we may not be able to blog about our fears any longer. Some of us, including me, blog about personal things, realizing that no one is ever going to really know us in person, so it is safe to blog about anything we wish. I have thought about my blogs and the things I say about Al and me. Everything I have ever written about our family has been truth, and yet when I actually spoke to a live blogger, I suddenly realized they could see my failures. I am a failure in my eyes as far as my looks. I always wanted to be a skinny Minnie girl who men wanted to gaze at but I am not. I don’t think God wants us all to be skinny. He just wants us to love him and love ourselves, and to be a healthy home for him to live in. Yes, I have learned much from bloggers. I have my struggles, just like you do. Mine is different from yours but similar. Always about life, love, acceptance and rejection. I don’t feel so bad anymore. I have a community that loves or at least respects my life I live. I have children that love me. I have God in my life, who is there anytime, if I just reach out to him first. What more could I wish for? Nothing. We bloggers are all leading lives that lead us down one of two paths. We either are striving to end up sitting beside the good Lord in the end, or we aren’t. That sounds pretty simple doesn’t it? It is a proven fact that the closer we walk towards God, the more tribulations we are dealt with daily. Being a Godly person is not easy. It is filled with decisions and rejections and battles, but in the end the price of going through the wars is peace. We are all striving to have this aren’t we? We all want our battles ended with peace. We are all different, unique, live in different areas, but we are all similar, We all want peace, and acceptance and to be loved. We have this, right in front of us. A lot of us will see each other one day. We may not recognize each other as that blogger on WordPress, but we will recognize each other as brothers and sisters.

30 thoughts on “Together, You And I

  1. ‘He just wants us to love him and love ourselves, and to be a healthy home for him to live in.’

    Amen! He made us all with love. Everyone has something special to offer this world and I agree that being a healthy home for God to live in is the foundation for that. Have a great day Terry!

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  2. Good blog Terry. Some of what you were saying really hit along the lines of what I’ve been thinking a lot lately, especially over this last week. I almost did a blog about it, and then just haven’t. I was telling my daughter though, I am tired, sick, old and worn out, and have felt so much like a failure because of some of those things. But this blog shows the ‘inside’ of me a lot of times…not that outside that sits here typing the words. Know what I mean? I talk to people in person, or on the phone, and they can hear the weariness, or see it. But through this blog, I’ve found God has used me in ways I never expected…but He’s also helped me to gain a sort of confidence. He wants us to be confident…humility is often thought of as a sort of self-deprecation, and it’s not supposed to be that way. Jesus was humble, but he knew who he was and was confident. I am thankful for this place and all of you, my friends here. I’m thankful to know that somehow God can still use me…and you…and all of us ‘in our weakness’…and make something of it all somehow. I’m very thankful for you Terry. God bless you! –Anne

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    • thank you my dear friend Anne. I am so thankful also that God led me to blogging after praying for many months to feel useful to someone. i have come to know God even more than i had before. he has opened my eyes, caused me to b humble and thankful and has brought wonderful people in my life. god is the reason for living and even sitting at home i am still useful. u r dear to me my friend

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      • Oh…you have no idea the tears those words put in my eyes…tears of thankfulness. I’ve been really sick again since yesterday. I slept a long time…woke up a few times in the midst, but posted that poem this morning and got so sick I had to lie down again awhile. Honestly…I’m so tired of being sick. But He has some purpose in keeping me like this, because Lord knows I’ve been trying so hard to get well. Thank you Terry…this blog was an encouragement to me this morning…and your words as well. ❤

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  3. Nicely stated, yes, we have much in common as brothers and sisters in Christ and one day soon we will stand before the Throne of God on the sea of glass.

    “Through many trials, troubles and storms…”

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  4. Oh Yes, and it’s lovely how we encourage one another towards that goal! 🙂 One way or another it won’t be long until we see our Lord face to face! What a day that will be….time to get ready for the best day ever, our redemption! 🙂

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  5. Isn’t it wonderful we are all brothers and sisters in the blogging world? We all are broken sinners saved by the Grace of God.
    We all handle stress differently and we all have our down times. But I have to agree with Terry’s mom, we need to dig into the bible for answers.
    As a boy I was taught to look at the good in every situation, and believe me even in the worst of times, some good was there to be found. I was taught not to fear because fear is the mind killer, so let fear pass right through you and over you, never letting grab hold of you. Grandfather always said it was the work of the devil playing with our minds. I have to agree with him.
    I have also learned that when you jump on the defensive without engaging the brain first, you usually end up being wrong and somewhat embarrassed. When we strike out against someone without thinking it through first we not only hurt the person, we show our ignorance.
    God tells us to love our neighbor as we love ourselves. We show it with kindness and compassion towards everyone.
    My mother was a great one to quote Proverbs in times of unrest.  A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger. The tongue of the wise commends knowledge,
    but the mouth of the fool gushes folly. I try to use this in my daily life as much as I can. I can’t say I always succeed.
    As you walk your daily path, keep God right there at your side, you will never walk alone.

    Ed.

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      • Where I grew up we never had time to get bored. Life on an indian reservation is chock full of work from sunrise to sunset. Your grandfather was a wise man!

        Ed

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      • i always thought so too. he passed away too soon and too young. he had a heart attack on the highway, he was the best in my eyes, always sharing his time and love with us grandkids. thanks Ed

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  6. i used to watch all the perfect family life shows too, because i so longed for that! i would come home from school everyday for lunch to watch Leave it to Beaver…lol. i don’t know if i realized then, it was the reason i watched them, but i do now…and now looking back they weren’t all perfect either…lol

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      • for sure but back then, they just swept it all under the carpet, that’s why so many are messed up today!

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  7. Amazed to read that you only been blogging for 9 weeks – good you gone a long way .. with your blogging and how to reach out to us. Fantastic!!! Your posts are always touching and so real …. Even if you don’t write about Al and all the drama he brings … at times. You have a true talent in how to express yourself in words … thoughts, feelings and needs – an your joy and love for your family and things.

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  8. Good thoughts…I have spoken to someone I blog with also on the phone but she knows exactly who I am and I she…We don’t know ‘everything’ but I wouldn’t worry about changing how or what I say in my blogs because I have come to feel comfortable with myself…flaws and all. I think we will know who we are in heaven…just my belief anyway…Diane

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  9. When we are young…we seem to see things only from the view that our families give us…I had the “Leave It To Beaver” homelife I thought…Protected from the bad happenings…as parents do…But as we grow older and start expanding our view and dealing with life without that protection…we see things as they are…But, in turn…we try to do what our parents did for us with our children…Protect them from the evil that can come into our daily lives…And if we are fortunate to find that peace and understanding that keeps us able to have hope…and strength to live this Earthly life…we can be ourselves…and enjoy what the Lord has shown us as Truth…Loving and accepting one another as they are and what we are…Isn’t it grand to have found this true peace!

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    • yes it is, although there is a part of me that wishes i could go back and have that great wish fullfilled. i had my children so i could build beautiful memories with them for when i am no longer here. i never realized when i had them, that years later when they were grown, they would hurt me the worst

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