Doctor’s Visit



I took Al to the doctor today to get results and make any changes to medications from his blood work. After he did his comparison from two months ago, we then began to chat about Al’s present problems, his Parkinson’s.

I left feeling sort of lost and confused and unloved. Yes, unloved by the doctor. LOL I felt like I could be in charge of anything at the doctor’s office. Everything I asked, his response was what ever you want to do. Really? Anything? At that precise moment, I had a splitting headache that started building fifteen minutes after I woke this morning,  precisely when Al got up. He started this bright, sunny day off with tears and cries of pain, coming from all over his body. Now would probably not be the correct time to let me have full reigns over the prescription pad.  LOL

The doctor observed Al in action with heavy tremors, and major tear attacks, snotty nose running to the floor, and asked Al what he wanted to have happen, and Al stated he wanted to go to a nursing home. The doctor looks at me and says, if that is what he wants than you should do it!

I changed the subject for a moment, and asked him why he could not give Al big time medications, that really would help dull his pain, then maybe he would not feel so bad and be so darn depressed. His remark was constipation. What? Yes, constipation. The types of medications Al has been taking for pain so far causes the increase of constipation. So then I sort of snickered and said that his entire family has dealt with this his whole life. Al was born without the sphincter muscle. This cute little muscle lets you know the correct time you need to head to the bathroom for poop duty, and when you don’t have one, you have to make a schedule for yourself to go every day at a  certain time, to try to train the body. Constipation was our family’s middle name while I was growing up. After supper each day, I heard, Al head to the bathroom and sit until you produce results! Boy, those were the days, but they all flooded back once I started to care for Al, as we have to do the same thing, and now with his obsession, I am trying to untrain him, and now I learn constipation can be a problem. Which way do I go, which way do I go!!!

I told the doctor that if he didn’t give Al some grown up medications I was not going to be able to care for him any longer, and he says, what ever you want. In the end, he gave Al and increase of one of his pain medications and introduced him to another one more in tune for his leg pains.

We went to our pharmacist and ordered the medications and ate lunch at the back counter, while waiting for them to be filled. The pharmacy is so sweet. They have known Al and me since we were five, and when the medications were ready they hand delivered them to us so Al could take one of each right there.

After that scene was over, we came home, and I think Al was beginning to feel a little bit better. He walked a half-inch faster than usual. I sure hope they help. I helped him get settled and he is now in his recliner watching television until the precise minute has arrived to take his nap.

I came back out to the kitchen and noticed I had gotten so wrapped up in Al, that I had totally forgotten to pick up my own medications for my diabetes that I had called in yesterday. This caused me to have to call in and let them know that I would definitely be in tomorrow for them before they closed.

Now I am resting, but my head feels like a teflon skillet is on top instead of the cast iron skillet. Maybe I will just mosey over to the living room couch and take a little snooze when Al does. It can’t hurt me, and it may help.

I have an appointment to hear options about placing Al this coming week. Placement has been moved from the back burner of my brain to the front burner, but I can’t help hoping that the right medications could produce a bit happier brother, and if it does, I can deal with the rest of the crap, no pun intended. LOL, and if it doesn’t, at least I am working on the placement thing.

25 thoughts on “Doctor’s Visit

  1. Terry, my dearest …. I think you should have a proper check up too – you’re so worn out … I’m more concerned about you then AL .. I think it’s great that you are looking into care lodging – dose Al mean that he wants to go into a care home … Or is’t only something he says because he has picked it up .. ???? Great that you’re looking at options. Doctors are doctors .. and sometime they are on a different planet – maybe AL is on the best medicine he can have already. Bad that he couldn’t explain things for you…


    • i think from what Al has told me the past few days is that he thinks he can get medications that will ease his pain more by going to a nursing home, and if this is or were true i would consider it quicker. right now i want to see if this medication works. he is now on the strongest dose of the one, which has been increased in strength now for the last time. if his pain continues to the point he has no feelings about life we will have to move towards nursing home care as i will have no way i can sit back and watch this man lose all interests in life over pain. right now he is still napping, and since i know he is breathing, i am going to leave him alone. it will help him play catch up with much needed rest. this is something i guess i am going to have to play day by day and see what happens, but i know there are options. as for me, i hope i am going to be alright, but knowing there are options for Al also relieves me of never ending stress.


      • Terry, for your own sake … I hope you are right – glad you have the kitten that gives you joy and comfort in all this drama. You’re some cookie – more than tough.


  2. It’s a pretty mixed up bag right now..New medications may help with one issue…the pain but there are a whole lot more to think about…but go at your pace and your time….Things will eventually become clear what is needed I believe….take care in the meantime. Hope the headache vanishes..Diane


    • he is sleeping past his normal time for his nap. i just went in and checked on him, and he is breathing, lol, I will let him sleep as he seems to be sleeping sound. New medications can do that to you when you first start them. I did take a nap and my headache is gone.


  3. Doctors can be helpful, I know, but this time was just so frustrating . .. and I wasn’t even there! haha! God bless you, Angel Terry, as you continue to do all you can for Al. love and prayers!


  4. Whatever you do, don’t forget the toll that this takes on you, and that your threshold of pain isn’t just incredible, it’s above what anyone could ask for. Personally, I still think your self-care is suffering each day, and I’m concerned that your need to please others will be at a hindrance to yourself. I say this of course, because of LOADs of personal experience and great sisterly love for you… Hugs….



    • I have an appointment with a lawyer this Thursday to find out what my options are for placing Al. Pray I can be so strong through this. I need part of my life back. I am too tired anymore and have lost who I am almost completely


  5. On one hand I can understand your feelings about the doctor and his responses. On the other hand, being a paramedic and former caregiver, I understand the doctors response.
    I once had a doctor ask me why I came to him if I had all the answers. It was a humbling experience, but I digress. Your need to protect your brother is understandable, but you have to remember the doctor knows best. Also, when Al said he wants to go to a nursing home, he is expressing his thoughts while looking after you. I often wonder why people feel the person they are caring for has no sense or realize they are also caring back. It is kind of selfish.
    Since I know this response will upset you, I will keep it short – It is time to place him and to take care of yourself before you completely lose it. That is the Clinical Psychologist side of me. I’m sorry if this upsets you.
    Your friend,



  6. The problem is, there are no simple solutions. Whatever you do will be hard for you both. All you can decide is what will be the least worst for both of you.

    I hope you are seeing a doctor yourself. That headache sounds like tension and there is definitely medication for that.


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