Daily Archives: November 14, 2012

Polly and Al

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pomeranian drinking in slow motion

Today, I took Polly out to see Al, so they could meet each other. I walked into his room and he looked at me and looked at her travel carrier and did not say a word. He seemed so quiet. I asked him if he was alright, and he said yes.

I took Polly out of her traveler and held her up to him, and I received a half-grin. I asked him if he wanted to hold her and his answer was no, so I continued to chat about her and how he was doing and his teeth.

He said he did alright and ate ice-cream and pudding yesterday. I saw that he had the dirtiest of nails. This is what I do not like about his shower schedules. Twice a week for someone who constantly digs at their head. I nicely told the nurse about it, and explained how they get so dirty so easily, and she said that he was getting a shower this afternoon, but to myself, I thought, what about the other five days in a week. I smiled and went back to Al’s room, but took mental note to keep tabs on this, because they will not allow him to have finger nail clippers.

Word got around that their was an adorable pup in the house, and soon I received lots of visitors in Al’s room to look at Polly. I was definitely the proud mama, showing off the new baby.

Al watched but said nothing. Maybe his teeth were still bothering him a little, but he definitely was not himself. I asked him if he still enjoyed living there or if he was bored and wanted to come home, and he said he liked it there, so I dropped the topic.

I asked Al if he would like to go to his favorite restaurant this Friday. I told him it was supposed to be fair weather and that I had been there yesterday and had missed him sitting beside me. He said yes and smiled at me.

I worry, you don’t need to tell me. He is my baby brother and I am still and always will be the one who will do what I can to help him smile. So he and I have a luncheon date for this Friday. We chatted for a while longer, and then I told him I needed to get going. He looked t me and asked,

You are not letting that dog stay here are you? I chuckled and said no, and he said good, because I don’t want to fall anymore than I have to.

I told him I loved him and would see him Friday, and left. A few more wanderers stopped to see what was in the traveler. I heard lots of cute remarks and one staff wanted to take her home with him. I don’t know about Al, but I enjoyed placing smiles on the elderly faces, that looked so sad.

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Daily Prompt: Revisionist History

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Go back in time to an event you think could have played out differently for you. Let alternate history have its moment: tell us what could, would or should have

English: This physical therapist is assisting ...

happened?

 

How many times have we sat with our best friend and went back in time and talked about the what ifs? I have done it and I am sure we all have. We can not change our past, this is definitely true, but we can learn from our past mistakes and decisions.

For me, I would have been a better character in decisions. I was a person who let others influence me, instead of sticking with what was best for me. I had plans, big plans, to go to college to become a physical therapist.

I knew even back in high school,that I was a woman  that wanted to help others. I wanted to make others lives better, by helping them to see that tomorrow was going to be a better day, if they could just get through this one day.

When you are in high school, you think you have all of the answers, or some of us did. Others did have a plan and stuck to it, and today, we see their name in the papers where they have become what they dreamed about, but for me I had plans, plus the need to be loved.

I don’t regret marrying, not at all, but I regret, marrying when I did. I had a whole life ahead of me, so what was the rush? If it is true love, it can with stand the wait of schooling, but I could not or did not want to see it this way.

The heart took over and the love became bigger than my goal. I thought I could go to school after being married, and today, when I look back, I could have done that, maybe, but before I knew it, one child came, then two, then finally the third arrived.

A busy mommy and a want to be a perfect wife, pushed my goal of having a career to the back burner. Now, I am middle-aged, my kids are grown and now Al is not living here, and I have nothing to bounce back on. Yes, I am a caregiver, but it does not bring the dollar amount that a professional would, and when we get older, we need a good dollar to keep up with our hurting bodies, and a good retirement, so we don’t have to stress out so much about whether we are going to be able to live until the golden years arrive.

So in finalizing this question, I wish I had kept strong about what I wanted in life, and kept things in their proper order. I would not stress so much as I do today, wondering where I am going to end up in ten years.

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Mother of Five

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She was lost. A mother of five, alone at 85, her home now in the Butler Nursing Home. She had been placed there five years ago by her children.

Their reason for placement was she was getting old, and they did not have time to keep coming over and checking in on her. They had their careers, and their kids who were in sports, and dance, and they just felt it better to  place her so they did not have to worry about her not eating, or maybe falling and no one would know immediately.

Sometimes on a Sunday, she would get a visit from a church member or the minister would stop by, and once a week, one of her kids would call her and talk to her for about five minutes.

She had been a hard-working woman in her younger days. She raised her five kids, pretty much alone. Her husband had been killed in the war, and although she received benefits from his death, times were tough, and she took in ironing from the city folk, and she cleaned the church building.

It didn’t give her much money, but she managed to put food on the table and to keep her kids clothed and in school. One time the school needed someone to clean the main part and they couldn’t find anyone qualified, but due to the need to want to buy Christmas gifts, the head master gave her a chance to do this,when she came to him offering him her services, so each year, about three weeks before Christmas, this mother would go in and clean, for the Christmas pageant, which helped her buy gifts for her kids.

She could not afford much, but was able to buy each child a doll for the girls and trucks for the two boys. She sewed stockings and made  hand-made soaps, pieces of chocolates, some cookies. She would stuff their stockings on Christmas Eve.

Now, here it was, Christmas Eve, and she felt lost. She had wandered  outside to the court-yard of the facility, and she was trying to go home. Home to where her little kids were waiting for her, waiting to be read their bed time story, waiting for their Christmas gifts the next morning, crying because they did not know where mama was. She was alone, alone on Christmas Eve, and the following day brought no brighter hope.

1.  Do you think the adult children made the right decision by placing their mama, and if so why, or why not?

2.  How do you feel about the idea that the adult children did not actually visit their mama?

3.

Nursing Home

What could you suggest, that would make this mama’s life a little less lonely?

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