Onward I Must Go!

After I was home for a while, I started to slide down a bit, and I fought it. I don’t want to be this way, so I turned the Sirrus Christmas music station on, and did this!! I know it is early, but I would have put it up in two days any ways, and it kept me busy. Well, almost seven pm, so I better go eat!

Thanks for letting me ramble on today! I don’t know what I would do without all of you on here……..

To each of you have a blessed Thanksgiving!!

Al, Pain & Me

I went to see Al this morning, and he was not having a good day. I stayed about an hour and a half, while he went through some deep heat therapy. His legs were in great pain and he was in freezing modes today.

The therapists and I could not get much out of him today, as the pain was bigger than the day. He even asked me to go get the nurse for some pain medications. The therapy has stopped for Al, as far as the physical therapy. The professionals say there is no more that can be done for his legs any longer, but when they see Al struggling to walk or his legs buckling, they haul him into the therapy room and use the deep heat to try to loosen up the nasty Parkinson’s.

I left him when I walked him down to the lunch room, and I saw three two-handled cups sitting there for him a long with weighted silverware. I am so happy they are having him use these, as the last time I took him out to eat, he could barely lift the glass to his mouth, and struggled to use a straw.

I am just amazed at how Parkinson’s can move along so quickly, almost like week to week you see changes.

I have had so much good advice from all of you on here about me. I have just been so far down in the dumps, I can barely climb out. Everything makes me cry, the dog is causing me more grief than pleasure. I just don’t think it was probably good timing getting such a young pup at this time.

I decided that I had to do something. I am afraid to remain like this in this stage, for fear I will slip into some depression and I want to fight it if I can, so this morning, for the first time in months, I put make-up on. I looked in the mirror and asked, is this really you?

After leaving Al in the pain that he was, my heart felt so much lower than ever, I got in my car and the car or God took over, or something grabbed a hold of me, and said press on young lady, you have a life to live, now get out there! I am sure it was my own self scolding me, but anyways, my car went to the beauty shop, parked, and went in, and when I came out, I looked like this!

It has helped some, I am back to my down feeling, but some good happened today also, so I am  hopeful.

Chapter 3

Human embryo at six weeks gestational age

The next morning brought a rush to the bathroom, seeing a girl bent over the toilet throwing up. She finished and got up and looked in the mirror and looking at her reflection, she knew that she was pregnant.

How was she going to tell her mom and dad? How was she going to tell Henry? She washed her face off and went back to her bedroom and laid down on her bed. She didn’t want to live, she just wanted to lay here and die. What had she done to herself?

Fear took over and she began to weep. She buried her head in her hands and cried until there were no more tears to come. She rolled over on her side and reached down with her hand and touched her belly. Nothing felt different, she didn’t feel anything, but inside she knew.

She didn’t know what to do, where to go. Were her parents going to kick her out of the house? Where would she live? Maybe she could get rid of this baby. The first thing she needed to do was find out if indeed, she was really pregnant.

She got up off the bed and got dressed, and went to the kitchen and poured herself a cup of coffee. Maybe she would drink two cups, maybe that would make this thing growing inside of her, go away. She sat at the table thinking what she should do next, and then decided to walk over to her friend’s house to seek some advice.

Finishing her one cup she headed over to her friends and knocked on the back door. Laurie’s mother answered the door with a big smile, letting her in, and telling her that Laurie was in her room, cleaning. Jane thanked her and walked towards her friend’s bedroom door and knocked. She heard a voice saying come in, so she opened the door and shutting it behind her, she went over and sat on the bed.

Laurie turned her radio down, and went over and plopped herself on the bed beside her and said,” What’s up? What have you been doing with yourself? I didn’t see you too much yesterday.”

With hearing these words, Jane broke down in tears again, and Laurie put her arms around her and said,” Hey, no matter what’s happening, it can’t be that bad. Tell me what’s going on? Did you and your mom have a fight?”

Jane looked up at her friend and quieted her sobbing long enough to tell Laurie, she just knew she had blown it. She knew that she was in big trouble, she was  pretty sure she was pregnant.

Laurie dropped her arms from around her friend, and stood up, walking over to her vanity and sitting down, looking at herself in the mirror, and asking Jane, “Are you sure? Have you gone to the doctor?” Jane shook her head saying no she had not seen a doctor. How could she go to a doctor? Wouldn’t the doctor call her mom and tell her?

Laurie stated as if she was an expert on the topic, ” No, doctors can’t say a word to anyone. They have some code or something that makes them keep their mouths quiet. Your mom and dad will never know. What you need to do girl, is get an appointment, and find out for sure. Here you are falling apart, and you don’t even know for sure!”

She walked over to her bed again and sat down with Jane, and opened up her bedside table drawer, and pulled out the phone book. She looked at Jane and asked, Who is your doctor? Do you want to go to the doctor that your parents go to, or do you want to go to someone who don’t know you?”

Jane thought it over for a second, and then said, ” What do you think the doctor will do to me? Is he going to make me get undressed? Do you think he will look down there?” Laurie laughed and said, ” No silly, you will go into the doctor’s office, and just pee in a cup. Then they do some kind of test with it, using a bunny, and if the bunny dies, you are pregnant, and if the bunny lives, this is a false alarm!”

Jane thought for a quick second, and then said, ” Well, if that is all that is going to happen, then let’s go to that clinic over on West Main Street. No one will know me there, and I can pee in a cup just as easy there as I could in front of my own doctor.”

Laurie thought that was a cool idea and said, “Hey, they are open today, and I don’t think you need an appointment. Go back to your house and put some clothes on that make you look older, then come back here. While you are gone, I will change my clothes too. We want to go in there looking like we know what we are doing, right?” Jane nodded and stood up and Laurie walked her to the door. Jane turned to Laurie and gave her a big hug and told her thanks for being her friend, and to please not say anything to her  mom about this, and Laurie, crossed her two fingers and promised, she would not say a word.

With this Jane ran back over to her house, and the two girls were busy now trying to make themselves look a few years older. After Laurie felt confident she looked her best, she went and found her mom, and said that Jane had to run some errands for her mom, and was it alright if she went with her.

Her mom said it was fine, and to have a good time, and to stay out of trouble. Laurie promised and went back to her room to wait for her friend. It took a while, but soon Jane was knocking on the door, and when Laurie opened the door, she stood there staring at Jane, and said,” Wow, girl, you look so cool! No one would know that you were only 16!”

Daily Prompt, Coming to a Bookshelf Near You

The first American edition of Harry Potter and...

The first American edition of Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire published by Scholastic, without its dust jacket. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Write a summary of the book you’ve always wanted to write for the back cover of its dust jacket.

It just so happens that last week, I finished my first book. I am now in the process, with a friend’s help, of trying to get it to look like a book, so that I can leave behind something I did, all by myself!

Take a young girl, who dreamed of becoming a dancer and instructor. Add to that, a mixture of not so perfect parents, an illness, and the desire to get through anything in life Have you ever wanted something so bad that you would not let anything or anyone stop you? Did you ever wish you had someone who was cheering you on towards that goal?

This is what my book is all about. Life, real life events, feelings and love.

About the author,

A woman who has always been part of healing. Healing others who are sick, or who are close to dying. A woman from the mid west, mother of three, grandmother of eight. A caregiver for most of her life. Writer, author, lover of antiques, and slavery.