Just Maybe

English: illustration of the Brothers Grimm fa...

English: illustration of the Brothers Grimm fairy tale “Mary’s Child”

It has been minutes for the parents who lost their loving children. For me it has been hours since I heard the news. My heart is still breaking, but I am also getting very frustrated and a little angry.

I want to blame someone, anyone, but there is no one particular to blame, because the guilty party was only a giant for a few moments before he became a coward and turned the gun on himself.

I would have great thoughts running around in my head if my children were still in school. I can’t tell you honestly what I would do. The mother in me would want to yank my kids out of school and teach them at home. It seems the weak are the targets. Is my brother safe where he is? I think that my thoughts would be like this; some training from me in tutoring  is better than more training at a school where my worry would always be with me whether my babies are safe or not.

Who can we blame? Should we blame the animal, our society, lack of morals in our world, maybe the animal’s parents. I could go on and on. I live in a smaller size city. I always thought nothing could happen in this little town. Drunks and speeding, maybe a fight once in a while, but let me tell you something. In our 35.000 population we have had teachers molesting students, rapes, murders.

What about the smaller towns who have been bombarded by animals, taking out people’s breathing, and then going into the courts and pleading insanity. Can you be insane and still plot how many guns you want to take into that business you are considering snuffing out? Can you plot how many rounds to buy? I think someone who can think like this, is not close to being insane.

It will not surprise me at all that this 20-year-old brat got into a tiff with his mother, and instead of doing what I used to do, turn and walk away or go outside to pout,  pulls out a gun and shoots his mother because he wasn’t getting his own way! To pay her double back, he goes and kills her students? All because he had no control over his anger? Then the coward shoots himself. Sure, he knew he didn’t want to be drug through the court systems or be placed behind bars.

We need tough love. We need to teach our children about love, respect, not getting your own way, that life isn’t fair, that we are going to hurt, cry, feel pain, and also feel joy and happiness. We can’t be our kids friends, it is almost impossible! How can we set a good example if we are going to place ourselves on a friendship level.

I watched  a show last night where the woman wanted to mentor a teen girl. Great idea right? It backfired on her though. The adult let herself go to the level of the teen in order to be good friends. They were both doing things that could have caused jail time, but luckily it was a television show, and the teen realized what was happening and went and made peace with her own mom.

We are taught as little kids that we will have fairy tale lives when we grow up. We are told we are beautiful, that there is no one else like us. This is true to a point. The difference is there are very few fairy tale lives in the world today.

There are way too many people living who have great emotional problems and I realize we can not fix each family’s personal life. The economy sucks, both parents need to work. Some homes have one parent, and even worse, some parents are not even home so the child raises themselves, but yet, we can not blame them can we?

The greed for money and better and bigger homes and three cars and maybe a truck is killing us. It is splitting up some families, in order to pay for these big items. I am not saying we should not want better things, but where do we draw the line. What are you going to take with you when you die? Zero. nada, not one thing. Every material thing on this earth in your possession is going to remain here for someone else to grab or sell. Only your soul and you know where you are going.

I have to stop now. I am going to probably lose some readers for being so outspoken, but I have to say what is on my mind. I don’t know why God allows things to happen here on earth. I don’t know what lessons we are supposed to learn. I can’t even admit that I have not wondered about God in the beginning. I am guilty of this with my  brother’s illness, but in the end, I find my way back.

There may be no God, there may be no heaven or hell. Maybe we just die and that is it. We go back to dust or rot in a coffin. Maybe we will leave a mark on this earth, who cares when it is our time to die,and we don’t know where we stand.

I am not going to take the chance. I don’t want to die and then be standing face to face with God or Satan. It isn’t worth turning my back on God, just because I don’t have all the answers. I am not to have all answers. Why, just because.

We need God back in our public places, in our government, in our schools and at work and play.  The more we take God out, the more crime rises, the more we lose our loved ones, the more we suffer.

I had to get this off of my chest so I can sleep tonight. I am sorry if I lose some bloggers over this, but maybe, just maybe, someone will really see what I see. Maybe I can give one more person hope, a little more faith. Just maybe ……….

34 thoughts on “Just Maybe

  1. Terry, you wouldn’t be you if you didn’t express yourself though your writing. Go ahead and get it out. Your blog is your own universe. We are all struggling with questions and emotions today, and need to find a way back to the good in the world however we can. I am grateful that you find a way to express some of the things I am feeling, but can’t put into words. Peace be wih you. Melanie


  2. God doesn’t let this happen. We do. God merely gave us free will and a mind. There is a lack of dicipline and parenting, a complete loss of respect for elders. Public servants cheat on spouses and we look the other way. Men like Michale Vicl get NFL cotracts instead of going to jail. We do it not God. We have lost our sense of a moral compass, of compassion of respect for all of life. We are reaping the seeds we have sewn. We are a society that condones violence on a daily basis–hence these are the tragic results we get. It is time to look inward and become stewards of peace and compassion in our daily lives……..


  3. Terry we live in a two faced nation: On the one hand we condemn this sort of violence – as we should – yet there are those within our our society who justify, tolerate, condone and promote the violence of abortion and the stealing of children through divorce and in some cases adoptions that would otherwise be illegal.


    • DaPoet, I find it amusing at how many excuses can me said and accepted. Our world in my opinion has become more about the ME affect. What can I get. Who cares if I stomp on another person or worse, take the person’s life. There is so much violence it is sickening. Our jails are over crowded with years of loafers sitting and getting free showers, meals and a bed. Laws are lax and we are becoming a joke to the nation. Sorry, I may have spouted off too much. Everything you have said though, I have to say I agree with …


  4. It is such a horrible tragedy! God needs to be in people’s heart. Whether he is praised in schools or not would make no difference if He was allowed in people’s heart. I can only pray that through this tragedy, people will not turn further away from God but that they would seek him to find answers and comfort. Answers, unfortunately, do not really exist. Sin is in this world and our only hope is to believe in the son that God has sent. Comfort can only be found in Him. There is hope now for the world to come, if only we believe in Him…

    it is a senseless tragedy. The killing of children can only be a senseless tragedy.


    • you are so right, first have Christ in each heart, but having Christ in schools helps keep us closer to god and helps students who have not heard about our loving lord at home. let’s just put god everywhere!!!!! right?


      • Hmm…I’m a bit bit sensitive on these issues since society considers the male gender as disposable; and while reserving it’s collective compassion for women and children ignores the plight of less fortunate men who are considered as failures.


      • Well, maybe you have run into a fresh face. I don’t see you nor I as any less equal than the other. males and females both do things wrong and right. as far as children go, i feel they have not had a chance to learn about life, to make decisions for themselves. their lives have been ended before they began. I do have more compassion for innocent children


  5. Terry, we have to change our society – we have to love people for what they are – we have to listen … we have to be there … we have to try a bit a hard … we have to have to stop to bring violence into our homes and life as entertainment.


  6. Writing brings healing and understanding. I have been asking why since I heard, but I can’t write, yet. It just doesn’t make sense. It is as if I can’t comprehend how someone can do this. Every time I think of those parents my heart breaks I want to sit in a corner and cry. Cry for those children, the parents and for our loss of innocence that started way before this tragic day.


  7. We went to a funeral today in a small town. The minister said many of the same things, and most of the attendants agreed, if not all. The older generation gets it. The younger one does not. As he said, it starts in the home.


    • yes, it has to start at home. who others responsibility does it lie with but the parents or the lives that are raising the child. having sex is for a moment in time, raising a child to be an outstanding adult is a never ending job. too many shrug it off and then wonder what happened


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