Daily Prompt : Erasure

High School Sweet 16 Toast

http://dailypost.wordpress.com, DP, Daily Prompt

You have the choice to erase one incident from your past, as though it never happened. What would you erase and why?

It seems in my opinion that the Daily Prompt forces your mind to go way back in your time. To dig up pain, hurt or embarrassment. This is not always a nice or fun thing to do.

As I sit here reminiscing on my past I wish I would have done one thing differently. I am sure there are several things I wish I could change. But I see it as mindless thinking and a waste of my time as I can not change the past. I must accept what I have done prior to today.

For this prompt exercise I will go back to the one highlight that I do ponder on at times. I wish I would not have given up on my furthering of my education. Why in the world was it so important to have a boyfriend? Or even think of marriage and bringing children into this world.

I chose the moments over the future. I know as a kid we don’t take the time to think a head. I am very proud of the schools today that encourage thinking and planning and keep with the idea until graduation day of high school.

I can remember going into the counselor’s office. Sitting down and discussing my tentative plans for my own future. I expressed my interest. He told me what classes to take and that was it. It was done and over.

It was such a small minute of my time that interest of boys was much more on the top priority of my list of things to do to make me happy. I did have sex younger than I should have. I did get married when I had plenty of time to do that. I love my kids to death but I would have waited. What was the rush?

This is what schools are teaching now. Wait, get your career. It is not a sin nor a crime to wait on settling down and bearing children. Now that I am older I could go to college, but I choose to be the caregiver I was trained for.

It is the monies, the financial stability that I lost. I get great satisfaction out of caring for someone. But let’s face it. It doesn’t pay enough to keep up with the changes in the world. Today you need to have a career behind you. You can not count on the happily forever married life any longer. Cancers have become a fear word as more and more young people get this illness. Partners and lives are taken swiftly and leave much sooner than we anticipated.

Now I have no one to lean on in my life. I have no big bank account holding all of my monies I have saved. I don’t have any insurance benefits tidying me through each month. For the first time in my life I am scared. Afraid I will be homeless. Fearful that I will end up in some state paid nursing home.

Why oh why wasn’t this taught in the high schools? I am not blaming them but kids need to be taught to not only look for a partner in life to share with, but also a way to protect yourself when you become old.

So in finalizing this prompt, I would say this is the biggest mistake I made. I can’t go back but I can hope that some young person reads my posts and learns something from it.

30 thoughts on “Daily Prompt : Erasure

  1. I just gave this advise to two newly married couples that I know. I ask the same question that you do about why this is not touched in schools. I was in my 30’s before it happened in my life


  2. Yes, that would be very good, Terry, but if they would listening? Wisdom comes in years and everything I was told to do or not, when I was young, I did anyway and now I wished I had listen to those wise words… sigh…


    • me too Angel. Except I had parents that neither encouraged or discouraged as far as futures go. but when I made mistakes they were the first ones I hurt. we can’t change the past and I can’t even guarantee a future. I know God is in charge of my life but still I find it better to go day to day because even plans today don’t always happen


  3. Love you for sharing, Terry. I did everything you wish you had done. Loads of college and degrees and no kids ever. Then, a sneaky genetic disease took my life away at 27, while I was a busy career woman who had it all figured out. I dread all that you dread, as I’m nearly 40 now (body thinks it’s 90), on SSDI, and live in a motel. Right there with you, sister. You can plan away and do everything right and you fall in a sinkhole, regardless. Don’t beat yourself up on that one!.


    • it almost isn’t worth it planning a future is it? I have learned, and I hate to say it, but I can almost plan on nothing anymore. Even family can interrupt plans. I don’t mean to be sour but facing life for what it is has taken me a while to accept, but it does save a lot of disappointment


      • I know that feeling. I used to always live for the future and now I fear it. What new health issue is coming next month? Just take it one day at a time; it’s all you can do.
        A quick story. My late grandmother was a 24/7 caregiver to my late grandfather for yrs as he’d suffered a stroke. She was in her 70s and full of health, but my grandfather’s chronic health issues (he had what I have) had left them in lower-middle class America most of their lives and then living off piddly Social Security and the couple hundred my grandfather got from Carpenters Trust later in life. She looked at me one day and said, “I thought these were the Golden Years?” I never forgot her words. You are not alone in this and it isn’t fair. xx


      • I feel that also and say it often. What in the world is Golden Years, no such thing anymore. We pray we make it to our grave without living on the streets


      • Amen to that. America lost its way yrs ago. It wasn’t always like this. We need to get back to the old ways of family looking out for family. Where did that go? The cultures/countries with multi-generational households don’t have this problem, even with limited means.

        You take care best you can!


  4. Terry, you shouldn’t regret what you haven’t done … everything happens for a reason – I have done my choices and I think I would have done the same .. today.
    But I have never wondered over the choices I did take or regret the choice I made .. You are very open and honest, but this is the second time .. you write and wonder if you done right or wrong, we can’t change anything – you have been a fantastic mother and sister … you have a generous heart and soul – you care for people … you’re an absolute amazing person.


    • oh thank you so much Viveka. I hate doing those prompts where you have to look back on your life. What is the point? I can’t change it. I don’t enjoy doing them. but it is good exercise for the mind I guess. I am where I am because this is the spot that has my name on it!


  5. Pingback: Daily Prompt: Erasure | Jodies' Journey

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