Art Scribbles

I can’t draw worth crap, but my Dad was a good artist. After spending a day with my girlfriend, she suggested I start sketching what ever it is I am feeling.

I bought the sketch pad but let it lay for a while. Then today for some odd reason I was just angry at the world. It came and passed pretty quickly. I think seeing Al the entire hours of a day have opened my eyes.

He is sick, really sick. He struggles for everything he wants and does. The video I posted last evening is just a small sample of his life. Getting up out of bed, is a real chore for him. The first thing he has to do is get those legs to work.

Something has changed since he has been home. I can’t put my finger on it, but something is different. In many ways he is calmer, but in other ways, the only thing I can think of is he has given up.

Not the kind where he cusses up a storm. It is like his body has given up or he is tired of working to survive. He barely touched his lunch, but he did drink his chocolate milk and his cookie, just like kids do.

I wanted him to stay in the living room with me after lunch but he insisted he go back to bed. I changed his brief and laid him down. I don’t know what led me to do it but I came out and got that new sketch pad and drew this.

I have no idea what it is, I just let my mind draw it.


38 thoughts on “Art Scribbles

  1. It looks like fear personified to me, Terry. But then again I could be biased as to the situation I am in right now. I am not very good at drawing either. Sometimes I do make doodles and it comes out looking like smoke or something to that effect. In high school my doodles were of aliens and sometimes roses and fancy hearts. I do better with coming up with words that pictures to draw. Fear can show itself in many ways and anger is one of them. Are you really angry or are you afraid? Fear translates into anger or stress for me and sometimes other feelings as well. Fear likes to disguise itself to confuse you.


    • I think I am truly afraid for him. I see him much worse than I did at the nursing home. I can’t believe how much his body does not work anymore. It makes me want to sit down and just cry.


  2. It’s only natural that your emotions are going crazy… Watching a loved one in their last days is hard to bear. I pray the Lord strengthens you and Al, Terry.

    Also, don’t worry that Al only likes sweets. As people age, their taste buds begin to die, and sweets are one of the last things they are able to taste. My mother only ate sweets at the end, and my father-in-law only likes sweets now.

    As for the drawing, I see fear of the unknown, anger and torment. I’m praying for you.



    • I won’t worry then about Al’s sweet tooth. As far as what you said about the sketch, you may be right. I fear because I see Al much worse than I thought. It breaks my heart. I don’t feel anger, but the struggle I see of Al trying to move any body part tears me up, he tries so hard. hugs Cheryl


      • Bless your heart. I understand what you’re going through. It’s only been a few months since my mom passed, and I was and still am heartbroken. It was so hard to watch her go, and yet at the same time, I’m so glad that I was with her till the end and that she knew Ioved her.

        I pray you’ll take comfort in knowing that you are blessing your brother each and every day, by having him in your home and loving him. Don’t think you have to try to hide your feelings and be strong either. It’s ok to let him see how much you love him. I pray the Lord gives you His peace that passes all understanding as you go through this trial, and that you will feel His loving arms around you in Jesus’ name.

        Love you Terry,


    • hi there my good friend. I don’t even know what that sketch represented, but that is how it ended up at that moment. great big hugs for the best gal around!!


  3. The drawing seems to reveal a lot of things about how you’re feeling, but then I may just be over analyzing the drawing — I have been known to do that. It does look like you have drawn the heart over and over, and so no matter what else happens or is in the drawing, the love seems to be the strongest thing you feel. I’ll have to ask Frank what he thinks when he gets home — he’s the one with the counseling degree, and would probably know more than I do, lol.


      • Frank finally got home, so I showed him your drawing and asked for his opinion. He said that, unfortunately, interpreting drawings is very subjective.
        General theories for certain things come into play, such as answering the question as to why certain facial features appear inside the heart, why the appendages could either be legs, fingers, or tree branches, etc.
        That said, some general textbook observations are this: The appearance of dark bars (all along the inside of what appears to be a mouth in your picture) are generally an indication of the drawer feeling like they have little or no control of a certain situation or situations.
        The appearance of distorted body parts is usually an indication of emotional turmoil or trouble.
        The heart (which appears to represent a person), appearing to be up a tree in your picture, might suggest a feeling of another person being out of your reach, either emotionally or physically, or both.
        Frank says that these interpretations are so general that he cautions you to take them with the same weight as you would from ANYbody who is not specially trained to interpret drawings. He only had one course that involved interpreting drawings and dreams, and he feels that hardly qualifies him, lol.
        Right or wrong, he did agree with me about the heart being drawn over and over indicating strong affection. Again, though, this kind of thing can be so varied in individual interpretation that even three different doctors might give you three different answers. Also the mood a person is in at the time they draw something can make a big difference from one time to another.
        I’m sorry we couldn’t be of more help, but I thought it might be worth asking Frank to get his input. He’s had more years of education and experience than I have on these sorts of things.
        I hope you and Al have a pleasant evening, and that Al rests comfortably tonight.


      • I read your comment with great interest. I like what you said. Some of it made sense to me also. I guess our drawings can say a lot about us. Thanks for taking the time to ask and comment back to me my friend


      • Almost everything that was said came straight from Frank, and he cautions against taking it too seriously. I hope there is something in your drawing that has helped you in some way to gain some understanding. Maybe I need to start drawing more, lol.


  4. Pingback: Come On, Let Me Have It | terry1954

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