Faster Than A Hummingbird


My morning wasn’t like I hoped. The first thing I did was change my sheets. When I came out to the kitchen I started the coffee and walked through the living room and stopped as I saw where Rhino got sick on the carpet.

I grabbed the cleaner and started to do my duty then off to get Al up. I should back track here and say that last night,  he didn’t want to get up from his nap after supper. After trying a few times I finally got him to wake up at 10:30 so he could take his medications and eat his snack.

After he finished he stayed a wake about an hour and then back to sleep. This morning when I woke up I could hear wild tremors through the baby monitor. He was a wake. So when I went in I had a big smile on my face until I pulled his blankets back and gulped and sighed.

Al’s internal furnace doesn’t work. His body doesn’t know if it is too cool him off or heat him up so he sweats terribly. When I stood him up he had sweated so bad that his image lay in the sheets. It was bad enough that the mattress itself was soaked.

I ignored it and got Al cleaned up and dressed for Day Program. After taking him to the kitchen and making his breakfast, I went to the kitty spot and it wasn’t good enough. I had to work at this two more times before I felt it was clean and odor free.

I then headed for Al’s room and stripped his bed and scrubbed the mattress down. After drying it good I took all the dirty linen to the laundry room. Checking on Al’s eating progress I saw that hundreds of beads of sweat  were popping out all over him.

When he finished breakfast he couldn’t brush his teeth as his tremors for the past few days have been quicker than a humming bird’s wings.banddemo.jpg

I brushed his teeth and washed him once again. I got his backpack ready and his lunch bag ready and sat him by the door. I went in and cleaned up the table and did the dishes real quick. I hurried and started the laundry.

When I went back to take Al outside to wait for the bus, he had sweated through his clothes once again. Another wash up and change of shirt. I gave him one of his medications to try to slow down the tremors and the furnace.

By the time the bus loaded him up I was ready for a nap. But it wasn’t going to happen. I had to meet Hospice this morning. Upon seeing him I noticed his sweating had decreased and so did his tremors, but he was in a roaring mood.

He was telling the nurse how bad his legs hurt  and cussing out the illness. She decided to talk to the doctor and see about increasing the dosage on his pain patch and to see if there was something for his tremors.

Al is taking the PRN medications now on a daily basis. The nurse explained that the more he takes the weaker his body will become and his agitated state of mind  will become stronger because he will notice his weakness.

It is like a darn Merry go round. It is never going to end. HPIM0140 He is going to take more and more pain medications to just get through each day until there are no more days left.

On my way home from seeing the nurse I came upon this stretch of road right before turning into my drive way. It is a straight shot. I suddenly started to think floor it Terry, just floor it. Drive like a demon from hell. Get the bugs out of your system. Clean everything out. Let’s go somewhere, nowhere, anywhere, but don’t turn into that drive.

The thought came and flashed a way. I came back to my senses and the sister I know I am and pulled into my drive. Back to reality I go. Check the spot on the floor. Finish the laundry. Squeeze in a little cat nap. Pull the pizza out of the freezer.  Dress it up better than it looks and pop it in the oven. Go outside and sit on the chair watching for the bus to bring my brother home.

35 thoughts on “Faster Than A Hummingbird

  1. You are one of the strongest person I have ever known. What you are dealing with is more than incredibly hard, it’s nearly impossible. Key word here is nearly. You hold strong to being Al’s sister and don’t lose yourself in the mix. Keep writing here, reaching out to us and we’ll be here to hold you up no matter what happens. You have all these ‘faceless’ internet friends, but our will is strong and our friendship stronger. We want to help you and ease some stress from you. You are not alone. I know how this feels and it’s a heavy weight on your chest but it doesn’t have to be. Put some of that weight on us. We’re here. I may not respond to all your posts but I do read them all! You matter so very much. Faith, hugs and Prayers, Colleen

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    • Colleen, you have a beautiful soul. It takes a special person to be able to see beyond the stem, deep into the petals. You have done this and I really appreciate it and your friendship. God bless and big hugs

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  2. As impossible as it is to hold onto Terry – one moment at a time..not a whole day at a time for it’s too big and long and unwieldy. Grab whatever moments you can of peace and hold them…

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  3. You are so strong and resilient I admire you so very much for the strength, stamina, love and respect you show daily. Surely the Lord has a crown with many stars and jewels for you in heaven but until then know that you are supported and loved that you are a wonderful woman and when the time comes for a break take it so as to care for yourself, you are no good to Al or yourself if you push so hard you can’t go on. prayers and love Terry.

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  4. You are amazing, Terry. Sometimes we don’t understand where all that energy is coming from at once, but it’s there to use it and you did. Hope you can get some rest. Sending Peacefull Pawkisses for the weekend 🙂

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  5. Pingback: We Have to Stop Meeting So Late Like This | terry1954

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