Merry Christmas From Me To You

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I am sneaking in here on the computer for a few minutes to touch base with you. Al has not changed at all. He is constantly talking but most of the time I can’t understand him. His latest words are 10,9,8,7,6,5,4,3,2,1,dead.

Imagine listening to that all the time. He has asked to be taken to Indianapolis. Of course he is sort of out of it. He has said that his taxes are behind, and they are not. He is so scared of the dark, that he request to have his light left on all night.

He says if he sleeps he will die, so he does everything in his power not to sleep. I was up most of the night last night. It is hard to even sleep through the day because when you do not respond to him he starts yelling.

I don’t want to be this way but the thought of Christmas doesn’t bring a smile to my face. I just want it over. I am looking forward to seeing my kids but that’s it. I want to tear the tree apart. Shove it in a box along with all of the happy, pretty decorations and just call this year a mess and hope for a better year next year.

But to all of you, my wonderful friends, I want to wish you each a Merry Christmas. May your day be filled with joy and love and peace.

Hugs,

Terry

dancing snowmensnowflakestwinkling treenativity-scene1

48 thoughts on “Merry Christmas From Me To You”

  13. I’ve actually boycotted Christmas this year. Can’t bring myself to doing it. Next year I vow to be better. You on the other hand brought Christmas to Al because he and you didn’t think he’d be alive to see it. I know it’s not been the easiest several months for sure, but only three days to go. Perhaps you both will find peace on baby Jesus’ birthday. Hopefully tomorrow there will be someone to hold the camera for you and Al to have another photo. Many hugs and lots of love on this journey.

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  14. So sorry Terry… Hang in there. I know it is hard and your heart is big.. This is the hard part of life! Keep the tree and all the pretty so you have something to look at… You have a world of support and we all are here for you! Merry Christmas… Your brother loves you….

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  17. I’m sorry I haven’t said anything up to now. I just haven’t known what to say. I still don’t. Just know that you both are in my thoughts and I’ve been carrying you around in my heart for days. Wishing you both peace this Christmas-time.

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  20. You are one of those that carry Christmas in their hearts all year long, doing what it good and right( and difficult) for your brother. I do hope though, no matter what time of the year it is, that some of that love will come back to you and shine on your path this Christmas and in the weeks to come, love and hugs, Solveig

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  21. Terry, though I haven’t been commenting much lately, I do read your posts about what is happening with Al. I cannot even imagine how this must be affecting both of you and it is certainly a very difficult and painful road you are traveling. I pray for God’s peace to descend into your home and your hearts. I wish I was close by so I could come and give you a big, long hug. But as I am so far away, my prayers will have to do. I know that sometimes God seems far away and uncaring, but He does love you both very much and is watching over all that happens to you. We sometimes simply cannot understand what He is doing or why, but in the light of eternity, everything is going to be fine. When you can think about others even to wish us all a Merry Christmas, you are going to be OK. I know words will not take away the pain, but sometimes they can soften it a little to know that others are praying and care very much about you. And the Lord cares more than we will ever be able to understand. I “see” His hand of blessing resting on your head and on Al’s right now though you probably don’t sense it at the moment. I pray that when this is over, you will be able to look back and see God’s hand in the whole situation. I pray that as your family come on Christmas you will have a special time with them that you will remember for a long time to come. God bless you with His peace, love, comfort, strength, wisdom and patience. Love you!

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