Daily Prompt; That’s Amore

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Think of your longest relationship: describe how your love has changed over time, did you go from the giddiness of infatuation, to mad passion, to deep respect, esteem, and friendship? Tell us about your love story.

I am sorry, I don’t have that beautiful story to tell about long-lasting love. I was married and immediately went to Germany. My husband was in the military. Through the years we had three children. We bought two homes. Life seemed good.

But for us, in time, things changed. Priorities seemed to shift. Drifting seemed to appear and before long people and things got in the way. It seemed the word Divorce, which had never entered my mind, was suddenly consuming my entire soul.

Pain, hurt, anger, and separation took over. Children who were innocent were being pulled in different directions. New decisions were being made, feelings were torn, tongues became thorns and life was as I had never experienced.

Through this time in my life I learned trust was not a strong word in my dictionary. Self-esteem was dropped to the lowest. It took a long time to  heal from this and still today, many years later, there are soft spots that I try not to dance around.

I am thankful that I still have my children’s love. I am thankful that I truly loved once. I learned at that time that there is no Fairy Tale life and we live reality each day in our lives. The burned feelings seem to remain somewhat today as the trust that was singed,  still remains.

I want with all my heart to find a good man today, but I am sure without realizing it that little word trust jumps out at me each time. I try to shove it down and realize that there are many good relationships out there in the world. I just need to keep my eyes and heart open and believe.