It has been since March 24th since my brother passed. All of you have been so kind to me during this healing time. When I look at the date it seems I should be much farther along.
I cling to your remarks, such as it takes time, don’t rush it, it is part of the grieving process. They help me so much. But I am getting tired of only feeling like I think of Al mainly.
My dad used to say, you are boring it into the ground.
I feel like this is what I am becoming. A sister, caregiver who just doesn’t quit. Maybe like the energizer battery bunny.
We all know I am missing him, and we all know that I am trying to move on, but I have not made it yet.
I don’t want to lose my blogging friends and so apart from writing about Al’s book or adding a photo I take, I will give up my short stories for a while.
You all take care, know that I love you and couldn’t have made it this far without you. When I feel like I have more to offer you in reading stories that you won’t get tired of, I will be back.
Today is still Mother’s Day. I woke up to my son wishing me a good day over Facebook and then by phone. A few hours later my daughter called from out of state. My last son and his family came down. He smoked pulled pork and it was the best stuff ever. Along with it there was macaroni salad, potato salad, cole slaw, pumpkin bars, and white cake with nice, gooey icing.
After that delicious meal was over my other daughter in law came over with her daughter. They fixed plates and we enjoyed their company. I have had a rough couple of days and today it was made sunny by my family.
My family doesn’t realize that a phone call or a visit can turn my entire day completely around. I was always the mom who wanted the Leave it to beaver family. Kids grown bringing their kids over anytime. No invite needed. Today was the closest thing ever. The only thing that would have made it better was if my daughter had been here in person, but I am thankful for the phone call.
My grandson, Easton is very close to eight weeks old. My other daughter in law will present Chloe in less than four weeks, but we all think it will be sooner. One of my kids reads my blogs, the other two do not. Either way, thanks kids for making my Mother’s Day perfect. Don’t worry brother, I thought of you often.
By the way, speaking of Al, I was rummaging through the shed yesterday and today and I found a box of Al’s. With Al’s mentality he never opened boxes. He didn’t enjoy many of the items he had. He looked at them in their boxes, but today, my brother was here with me through music. I found a Coca Cola radio. It had never been opened nor used. It comes with a phonograph, CD player, clock and AM/FM radio. It is all in a nice wooden, grained box. I played this all day long, and thought about dear Al every time I heard it’s beautiful music.