I had a very restless night last night. I didn’t sleep well at all. I stressed and worried about the many negative remarks on my post yesterday.  I pondered on maybe just giving up writing.

If I have to worry about whether I am going to be slammed for my honesty in writing, it may not be worth putting it out to the world.

A friend did remind me that my blog is placed for all to see and there are strangers who don’t know me who may take the postings in a different view. This is so true. If you don’t know me, then you would be more free to judge in a wide-angled space.

I have never considered putting an invisible fence around my thoughts. I have shared so much of how I feel and what I observe in my life. I never thought once about being cautious about what I say.

Should I talk about common things, pretty things, pretty babies, or going to a friend’s house for dinner. Must I always keep my subject matter on a surface level?

I think when I have to do this, then I must stop writing. I must admit that I never dreamed that asking for a few  healthy tips on how to keep my dog from tripping me by walking under my feet would cause such a negative over-load of comments.

I did get an excellent tip from Tobi on my Facebook. She told me to put small rugs in my kitchen or bathroom, anywhere he is under foot and teach him to sit on those while I am in that room. This way I am safe, he is safe and we are together. This is exactly what I was looking for, and I will start using this tip today.

Thankfully, there were some who emailed me, and talked to me on Facebook that helped me. Also a blogging friend who I have known and respected so long on WP, made it clear to not let others bring me down or strip me of my joy in life.

I thought about this and I have been temporarily stripped of joy. Losing my brother Al, was devastating. He wasn’t just my brother, he was my kick-side and I was his caregiver, 365 days a year for seven years. Of course I am going to feel empty.

Should I go into a deep depression or sit alone crying? I need to be needed. I want to be accepted. This is why I got AJ. He can’t replace my brother, but he can  help heal me in ways my empty house could not do after Al left.

I want AJ and my relationship to be fabulous. I believe in training when they are young. I believe in not letting a pet as well as a human run my life, but to make my life better. I believe that AJ needs to be adapted into my world, the way I live with lots of love and laughter.

I am much better because of AJ, but like our own young children, we had to teach them right from wrong, just like we do when we get new pets. I didn’t beat my kids and I don’t beat AJ.

I don’t walk around here with a fly swatter in my hand just waiting to pounce.I don’t own one of those training clickers so I used the click of the fly swatter one time on the top of his cage to teach him it is wrong to bark in his cage. He learned immediately and has not barked since.  I am a good person. I love people and life. I cry still missing Al, but I laugh more because of AJ.

I can’t make you read each word I write. I know many scan blogs to pick out the highlights. I try to write something interesting and there are many times I ask for tips or help. I never pretend to know it all.

I am still fragile inside from my brother’s death. I have to make the decision to change myself to please everyone or remain true to myself and keep looking for the good in life. I have chosen to remain myself, maybe a little too honest. Maybe a little too  emotional, but I am who I am. I can’t quit writing, this is part of who I am.

Thank-youme may 2014

29 thoughts on “Thank-You

  1. that’s right….don’t let anyone steal your joy! Go where God leads you! May God bless you with comfort as your mourn, lead your every step, and remain close to you in all things!


    • Bless you my friend. Your comment means the world to me. I always hope and have faith that God leads me in my life. It was God who prompted me to begin to write two years ago in fact. Hugs


  2. Terry, Terry. I didn’t look at the comments because I haven’t read the posts yet where you asked for help with AJ. This I know: If you want to write, and write honestly, you’re going to get negative responses. It goes with the territory. I just don’t publish comments I get that are mean, argumentative, and ugly. They don’t help me, and they won’t help my readers. I’m thankful to say that in over two years of writing my Bible study blog, I’ve had only six, maybe seven, ugly responses. I really expected more, considering the subject matter, but so far so good.

    All that to say this: Ignore the unkind and mean-spirited comments. You d on’t have to publish them. Honest, well-meant criticism is a blessing. Ugly, hurtful criticism just reflects the spirit of the critic and isn’t worth a single one of your tears.


  3. Negative feedback is the result of the small minded and unhappy. I often disagree with others but when I express my opinion I make sure I am respectful in the way I do so. We all need to recognize that when we do not share the same opinion or see an issue from the same perspective, it does not mean that that either one of us is right or wrong, it simply means we see things differently. Unfortunately those who are weak minded and insecure in themselves often feel the need to attack. Please remember that this is their problem and not yours!!!!


  4. I apologize for the foolish mortals that speak negativity on someone else’s blog. This is your play-pin and should act the way you feel. Keep blogging your way. If you need to write to keep from crying, do you, your way. When someone comments negativily on your blog, don’t explain yourself to noone. Remember, they came on your blog and curiosity killed the cat. Love you, be encouraged, keep blogging.


  5. I am sorry I didn’t get to see your posts until just now or I would have mailed you straight away. I am so sorry you had the replies that you did, but don’t give up writing.


  6. I’ve been so busy lately & lots going on.
    I wish I would have seen your posts yesterday. Not that it would have changed what some people said. But – you could have read mine & a few others & junked the rest. 😉
    Anywho – I vote for you to keep writing & to stay true to yourself. That’s the Terry that we know & love.


    • And I plan to do so. I learned but evidently forgot, lol, to always stay true to myself, to not change in order to have everyone like me, because not all will. Thanks RoSy. I think I was just so shocked by all the negative it threw me for a loop


  7. Terry, I read your blog posts but don’t always comment but I wanted you to know that baring your soul through writing is helping you deal with the loss you have suffered. This is your blog and that is all that matters. It’s easy for me to say “ignore the negative stuff” but we all know that is easier said than done.
    Just keep being you. That’s all you can do.


  8. Oh my wonderful friend! You got it! we are here to support you. Aj is cool but what is best for you both is for you to make boundries. As in.. AJ no jumping… no stepping in your walking space. That way you both win. Secured. Hugs and much admiration. and yeah…. yada yada yada!


  9. Terry you always have been an honest person and your writing brilliant and no one can say differetn. You cannot please every ne and there are different opinions of different subjects, that is a fact. don;t take it too personal. you know who we are and love you! Keep going strong!


  10. when we write in this open forum i think we can expect that not everyone is going to agree with us or like what we say. just remember that animals learn and retain training more when positive reinforcement is used. i’m sure there are training books at the library you might use also. we paid a trainer to help us train our border collie and the one thing they told us and i have read is never to hit an animal with anything including your hand as it will break their spirit. i wish you luck, training can be a real test but training is the best way to keep you both safe.


    • I totally agree, but what I don’t agree with is that rudeness and assuming the worst is not always acceptable. I agree to disagree as far as opinions


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