Hair Trimmers ETC.


There isn’t a day that goes by that I don’t think of my brother, Al. I look at this photo and I can see he is almost ready to tear up from the pain he endured. Oh how my heart bleeds when I see things that remind me of him.

It may not solve all of my problems but getting out of this home that has mainly memories of death can’t do anything but benefit me. Tonight, I went back to packing. I was cleaning out the items under my bathroom sink and found a large zip-lock bag. I don’t know why I had placed it in my bathroom. Who knows what kind of thoughts I was having from the day he left this earth.

In the bag was all the hygiene I had used on him. Hair trimmers and mustache trimmers, combs and nail clippers. I almost dropped it as memories came flooding back. The tears started rolling and I realized that although I am making progress, it is still very fresh and may take months and months for me to get through this.

How can something so small bring so many tears? Because each time I did anything other than bathing I put a little more love into it. I knew I was hurting his neck when I trimmed his hair. I knew I was hurting his head as I tried to shave him. The pain I brought when I tried to pry his fingers open to trim his nails.

Love, the love that I still feel for my brother is very near and just re-living those last six months of him being bed bound and the extra care and sensitivity along with compassion are so painful to me today as I realize I can never trim his hair or nails again.

Oh my brother, my bud, as I called you; what I wouldn’t do to see your face one more time. It feels like someone just stabbed my heart with a hot branding iron. I miss you so much and I will never, ever forget you.


mountains 2


Enough of the noise

Enough of the chatter

The bitching and like

Nothing seems to matter


I have to leave

I tell you now

I gotta get out

Or scream and shout


I clock out today

And go home and pack

I leave a note

I am not coming back


The drive out of city

The air begins to clear

I can almost feel

That I am very near


I get out of my car

And shut the door

I look back at the past

Thinking never more


I stand at the bottom

I look way up

I can feel my heart

Running over the cup


I get my gear

And I lock the doors

I head up the mountain

For ever more


No one will see

What my eyes can view

Understanding is gone

Between me and you


I find a place

A perfect fit

I place all my things

Then I bend to sit


The air is pure

My head is clear

I can feel God everywhere

He is very near.

Written by,

Terry Shepherd

(Facebook) Terry’s Thoughts in Poetry


In The Beginning

In The Beginning


What is in a cat

That makes us smile

Or a dog who provides

Us throughout the miles

Or the horse that is ridden

Along the fields

What gives us the feeling

Of contentment, a feeling of healed

What is there about fishing that does

Bring us peace and serenity

What is it about watching an insect crawl

That can bring us down on our knees

Maybe it is our souls that bind us

Maybe it is because we have a link

After all when God created us

He created the creatures and us in sync.

Written by,

Terry Shepherd

Thought’s In Poetry, (Facebook)




Is Working Hard Worth It?

I don’t know about you, but I hear often about the people who live in the world who are hungry, have water that is unclean, or have little or no money. Is it happening everywhere, but in your neighborhood or is it happening next door?

I can think of a couple of people who I know that life could be much better who live near me. The circumstances are different but I believe the suffering is all the same. The first instance is a lovely lady who was once married, now divorced. She lives in a beautiful home and was rewarded the home through the divorce papers.

Is it a reward or can it be a burden? Is it a reward when the struggles become too  deep to keep the payments going? It has to be difficult to lie down at nights only to have these worrisome thoughts about losing not only the one you love but maybe the house you have become familiar with and have many ties with.

Always thinking up new ideas to gain a little money to keep all bills going. I guess a lot of it would depend on how much I loved that property compared to how much turmoil I wanted to place myself in. For others it may be a fight to win, to not have to give up or give in to someone who doesn’t give a shit whether I have my home or not.

Not being able to go to the grocery store and get the food needed or maybe having to seek aid for things needed. It is sad to me, that even with college degrees and all the work people can find, there is still risk of losing one’s home.

The other person I know is a sweet and lovable one. Also having to count pennies. Being retired and always having worked hard at a white-collar job, realizing now that all that hard work just doesn’t pay off real well as the economics are out of balance.

The government helps but not before you are on poverty street. People will not get help until they have less than fifteen hundred dollars to their name. This low amount of money allowed to keep is nothing to dance around about.

In today’s times fifteen hundred dollars is nothing. I know that sounds cold, but look at the prices of rental properties. In less than two months your money could be wiped out over having a place to meet.

Oh yes, you can get help from different programs, but the amount allotted is considered nothing above the poverty level. Somewhere the idea got lost that we, the people, have paid in our entire adult life, so shouldn’t we have a fair compensation when we grow to the point of retirement?

To realize there is little or zero work at that age and to receive a monthly check makes me sick to my stomach when you think about the years of hard labor and then you have to be even more cautious as you feel the pricking of aches and pains and the golden years.

Vehicle trouble is or can be very costly. What if we can’t afford that? After all we only have that level of money we are allowed to keep and a pension check. Car issues can start at a level of 100.00 and rise to very high levels. How do people get around when the car doesn’t run right or at all?

Having to count on a ride when we have been self-sufficient for so many adult years is embarrassing and humiliating. Maybe walking is too painful or the weather isn’t cooperating to get out. So many circumstances in our world, and so few ways to make life what it once was.

I am heading in that direction one day also. I am not married, I have no partner to help out. What monies I have I may not have long. What if I also one day only receive 100.00 for food stamps because of my lack of ability to work or my age. Could I make it on that amount of money when it is so easy to spend the amount entitled to me in one week?

What do we do when we are faced with life decisions like that? I have to say it is scary to me. The Lord will help me but there is a part of me that doesn’t want to have to worry each night I lay my head down to rest, about what am I going to eat the next day. Or how am I going to get to the grocery store, who can I bother to ask for a ride, or will I have a place to call my own.

Life is not as it used to be. We worked hard, we were able to save a few dollars back. Retirement was easier to work for and achieve. Pensions were better. Savings programs were options through your paycheck, but not now. Now we scrape by, working harder than ever, sometimes doing the job of two people for less benefits and money.

I don’t really feel any better writing this post as I realize I am also unable to help those around me that are suffering. I feel that the three classes of people are no longer there. The poverty, middle class and the wealthy. Now we have more poverty and the wealthy.

We are born, we live, we work and try to play and then we rest, but does  true rest  really come? Is there still the slogan called The Golden Years? I don’t think so unless you are very lucky. I think there will be even more suffering through the years to come.