Teen Pregnancy

I am watching this movie  on Hallmark called, Stalked at 17. It is a good movie; but then again most of this station’s movies are.

It brings a lot of thoughts to  my mind. A college age guy has a relationship that is fairly new when he impregnates her. Of course she is only 17. I think back to those days when I was that age and even earlier when I had feelings for boys.

It didn’t matter what family said, if I was in love, I was in love. I didn’t get pregnant at that early of an age, but in ways I understand how this happened between the two. A young lady wants to believe all the love-sick words that are whispered in her ear.

Of course there are those rare instances where life does work out between young people, but most of the time it doesn’t. I believe that a male and a female at this age want to prove they are worthy of love, and being loved and want to belong. They want something or someone that belongs totally to them.

Now that I am older, I can see clear the hardship that can be placed on the parents, the child and the grandparents. Many times today parents are bringing up their children’s children.

To make this movie more intense, the adult male is also messed up emotionally. He wants to belong so bad to someone. His mother is an alcoholic and is serving a number of years in prison for drug abuse. He has missed out on the love only a parent can provide.

It doesn’t really say how he has raised himself the past several years but it makes it seem like he raised himself from a teen forward. Once she tells her boyfriend she is pregnant, you can instantly for a short moment see the anger in his face. He changes quick to the happiest to-be dad and the two plan their lives together. I won’t go any further, in case you want to see this movie.

My thoughts are what would you do in this situation? Would you forbid your teen to see the father to be? Would you go so far as to get a restraining order? Would you threaten your teen to have an abortion? Would you consider booting her out of the family home?

What if you were the parents of the father to be? Would you force him to stand up and take it like a man? Would you consider driving the two teens as far apart as possible? Would you kick him out of the house?

Today, compared to when I was a teen, there have been many changes in how we look at teen pregnancy and how our teens act towards each other. When I was a teen, there was a certain fear of God that my parents placed in my head, that having sex was wrong unless you were married.

I am not saying I always obeyed their rules, I had boyfriends; but that fear of what my parents would do to me stood stronger than my so-called love for a guy when it came to undressing and laying with him.

There was no way I would even consider having relations with a guy when first meeting him. I got more excited about holding hands, love letters, or sitting close to each other, and of course that special kiss.

Today from what I have been asked by dating sites, it must be a common thing to have sexual relations on a first date. I still can not do this. I must have feelings for the guy and they don’t appear after a few dates. I guess I am old-fashioned?

The good thing today is there is no more hiding about ways to prevent pregnancy. Condoms are passed out freely. Classes are taught on what it details of being a young mommy or daddy.

The bad things that haven’t  changed is that we we are humans. We are still feeling the urges. We still have needs. Sad to say, the heat of the moment can block the brain of putting a condom on. Birth control pills have to be taken regularly and not only when it is thought of.

Like I said earlier, there is much to think about when parents find out their children are becoming parents.  I asked you earlier, what would you do if your kids came and told you they were going to have a baby?

 

Creme Brulee Coffee Creamer – Shugary Sweets

Creme Brulee Coffee Creamer – Shugary Sweets.

Pains and Gains/ The Daily Post

http://dailypost.wordpress.com/dp_prompt/pains-and-gains/#like-89435

Do you agree with Jane Fonda’s favorite exercise motto, “no pain, no gain?” Is it impossible to attain greatness without considerable hardship?

 

There are a few points to this question. Different ways to look at life, where you are at in it, and your health and contentment.

When I was in my twenties and beginning to raise my family I wanted to be like other moms. If there was talk about joining a friend or group to exercise, I was all for it and joined in.

We laughed at the end of the session as we limped or rubbed a sore body part. We knew we were tough and could endure the pain, stating to each other how out of shape we all were in.

We were more in tune with clothing. We squeezed our butts into tight-fitting jeans. Showing a little cleavage wasn’t a bad thing either; after all, everything stayed in place and perky.

Make-up on, hair always done, nails freshly polished; yes, pain for gain was absolutely worth it.

Last night I was sitting at the table with my friends at the Moose. We all ate supper together and then from the time we disposed of our plates we began our chatter. We thought nothing of our conversations. We spent more time laughing until our guts hurt and tears were rolling down our faces.

An hour or so of this passed, minutes ticking by, when we all began to notice how much sooner it is getting dark outside. One of my friends made a show-stopping comment and we all quit laughing.

Her words were, ” do you realize that all we have talked about is the amount of pain we are in”?

Those words hit me hard. We all looked at each other. I looked around at the people sitting near me. I fit in too well. I fit in the category of older people. I could tell by the conversations that we were all in the same boat with similar issues.

Some were speaking about how little time they had to themselves as they were caring for a parent. Others were speaking about how tired they were after still having to work too many hours in a week. Some faces reminded me of a person showing up to the dinner out of routine; but if they really thought about it, they would rather be home in their favorite chair, watching TV and nodding off and on.

My friends and I were doing the same thing, but we were still laughing about the pain we are going through, just like I did when I was in my twenties. The laughing stopped after my friend’s words. She continued on with, ” I want to talk about the weather, beautiful roses, the stars at night.”

Yes, that sounded so peaceful and enjoyable, but the truth is; it is hard to speak of those visions when pain interrupts our daily pain. The thought of real exercise brings a wrinkle to my face. A nice walk wouldn’t be bad, but I don’t want that terrible pain for gain feeling any longer.

I have issues with my Parkinson’s that I don’t like. There is no particular thing I do or not to bring it on. My muscles twitch. Sometimes it feels like little ants are crawling on my arms. I will look but see nothing, brushing off the invisible creatures.

When I walk I feel unsteady. The fear of falling drops the vision of  the wonderful time I have of taking a nice, long walk. My legs tremble when I move them. It just makes me feel weak all over.

Instead of thinking of enduring an exercise class, I am more in tune with what medications I can take to ease the pain. I ponder on giving into the tired feelings I have and take a nap. I don’t go out of my way anymore to do a lot of house cleaning all in one day like I used to. I do a little each day and sometimes if my pain is enough I will skip a day of cleaning.

I can look back now, as well as all of us sitting at that table and become a little sad at what we can’t do today that we did only ten years ago. The positive note in this though was sitting together and for a good amount of time, we laughed at each other for the pains we were enduring.

The best exercise for people at my age or with terminal illness is laughter. If we don’t laugh, we don’t live. My advice today is no more pain for gain. We should do what feels comfortable. Take a shorter walk, dance a slower dance, stay involved with family and friends; and lastly, enjoy each day like there is no more tomorrow.