The Strangest Summer Ever

I have never been the one who goes on vacation in the summer time. One time I went with a past husband and I ended up getting pregnant. Now that was a vacation that I will never forget, every time I look at my son.

I would love to go somewhere, even for a couple of days but this summer has been the strangest ever. If you cross the state line or if you go into a store; you risk catching the virus. The beaches are open but there are people there. I guess i don’t want to risk getting Corona 19 because I remain home most days.

I see the television ads for places far away and I think, how dreamy that would be and then I start thinking of the money needed to go and the prep work in getting ready to go and by then I am tired.

I imagine my summer trip will be my trip to the Movement Disorder doctor in Indianapolis, which is about three hours from me. I will have a companion with me and most likely get a motel because I have a hard time getting around in the mornings and I would have to leave here by around six-thirty and I don’t do well with that.

I have a porch where I live but the humidity has kept me from sitting on my porch chairs most days. The good thing is, next week we are to be in the seventies. Wow! What great temperatures. I will try sitting out throughout this period.

I will be soon repeating my care giving skills as my friend who had the surgery a couple of weeks ago and for whom I cared for, is having another surgery on the opposite arm. I am okay with it. I like caring for others and I am mentally prepared to as what my duties will be as this is a repeat of the first surgery.

Tomorrow I am going to be able to get out of the house for a while. I am going to be a passenger and get to go two a few places out of town. I will be able to enjoy the ride and probably take a few photos.

Can you believe July is almost over? Our weather has been more like August so I wonder what our next month will be like.

Do you have any plans for the rest of the summer?

Below is a few photos I have taken in our summers in Indiana.

Help Others as We Help Ourselves

I haven’t been on the computer too much in the past week. I was with a friend who was also a patient for surgery. After the surgery, I was helping with daily needs as the surgery was on the arm.

I almost forgot what it was like to help someone in person. I had over twenty years caring for the sick and aging. After caring for Hospice the last five years and then caring for my brother and my father during their terminal illnesses, I have only cared for myself these past few years.

It wears you out! How did I do that for so many hours and years? Maybe I was just younger and of course I didn’t have this neurological illness then. I always had this thought. God gave me the experience to be able to care for my brother and father in their homes instead of nursing homes and then when they both passed, my job was done.

It seems all in perfect timing to me, except the part of now I am the one ill. I wish sometimes that I had the family member to help me, but with my experience, I am able to care for myself for now.

Have you ever had to care for someone? How long was it? What were your duties?

A Day in a Life

Well, in less than a month, I will have lived in my apartment for one year. There are times that I compare where I live now to where I had lived the last two years.

Old apartment;

Close to town

Everything under one roof {trash disposal, mail}

Too many rules that changed at the blink of an eye

Someone I could talk to if I wanted to

Bed bugs

Drugs

Alcohol

No close parking spot

Not good snow removal

New apartment;

More quiet

No one to talk to

Rules that you can count on not to change

Parking outside my front door

Snow removal

Farther to town

Trees and nature

Freedom to make more choices

More expensive

I won’t be moving from here this next year. Although I wanted to because I wanted a place that was big enough to ride my scooter on the inside and also because this is not a disabled apartment, I will be here.

I can’t believe the prices of apartments here in my town. We have factories and are known for the orthopedic capital of the world. This drives the prices out of my range. I also believe that the good Lord wants me to remain here for his own reasons or I would have located a new place.

I never thought I would be living in an apartment at my age but life changes and sometimes it never goes back. We must accept these changes if we want to live with inner peace or else we will be miserable the rest of our lives.

Every morning when I wake up I thank God that I have another day and ask him what he wants of me this day. I know he is guiding my today and future days, so I am not going to fret about the new expenses for the next year. I know I will figure out how to handle my challenges because this is where I belong, at least for twelve more months.

I Couldn’t Sleep

I was trying to take a nap but this strange tune came to my mind and words I had never spoken, so I got up and wrote the words to a song called, Why did you treat me so bad?

Why did you treat me so bad

I remember sitting in the car all alone

Watching my family on the bench eating their cones

Brushing tears as they rolled down my cheeks

I just wanted to escape and run from my defeat

Chorus;

Why did you treat me so bad?

What did you want that you thought that I had?

I saw what perhaps was pain in your eyes

Maybe, you and me; we just wanted to die

I remember coming home from school on e cloudy day

A crowd of people all standing in my way.

They wouldn’t let me walk through my very own front door

Whispers of, “We’re never going to see her ever anymore

Chorus;

Why did you treat me so bad?

What did you want that you thought that I had?

I saw what perhaps was pain in your eyes

Maybe, you and me; we just wanted to die

Daddy packed his suitcase that very night.

Placed the gun in my lap and said to sit tight

I saw him quietly slip out the back door

All my dreams died and crumbled to the floor

Chorus;

Why did you treat me so bad?

What did you want that you thought that I had?

I saw what was perhaps pain in your eyes.

Maybe, you and me; we just wanted to die.e cloudy day.

Written by,

Terry Shepherd

07/12/2020

Enough!

Everything you hear about today is the deadly virus or BLM, Black Lives Matter. Why is that what we hear? Don’t All Lives Matter? We don’t hear White lives matter, or poverty lives matter. God didn’t make us to separate us.

I am all for one and one for all. I am for equality. I am for doing what’s right in God’s eyes and if you are knowingly sinning, than it is going to be between you and God on judement day.

I am all for history. I study it myself and I want my grandchildren to learn about history and see our history sites throughout the world. What we are doing today is wrong. There is no you or me or us. We are family, living on this big blue ball.

I was very upset at the video I watched on our local news yesterday. It is a true story that happened about thirty minutes from where I live. You will see this below. Click on the link. I don’t want to hear the screaming anymore when crap like this happens. I don’t want to see anymore destruction of our history. I want everyone doing bad things on purpose to stop. This is all nonsense to me. Explain why this is happening in a BLM world.

https://www.abc57.com/news/elkhart-pd-searching-for-suspects-who-beat-robbed-man-in-wheelchair

And the Heat Continues

Oh my gosh it is so hot outside. I hate having to run my air conditioning 24/7 but with high humidity and heat, I can’t breathe well enough. I can remember being a kid and nothing bothered me enough to not ride my bike. I don’t remember ever telling my parents it is too hot outside to play. What happens to our bodies as we age that we can’t take the heat?

The virus is on the rise here in Indiana. This is another reason I don’t venture out too much. Why did we believe that as children we better follow the rules but as adults we can choose to ignore rules?

https://www.coronavirus.in.gov/2393.htm

I am not the brightest cookie in the cookie jar but I just don’t understand the ripping down of statues which is our history. Can you explain how this can release our history?

https://wsbt.com/news/nation-world/columbus-statue-toppled-thrown-into-harbor-by-baltimore-protesters?fbclid=IwAR3W0DRZ49tsUpDLjGJlb5UvUvEPfZEbgkt7FL4Y5zMuuNxIz9_bNQmQ0UM

Keep Quiet Girl

My poor neighbor lady. I doubt if she sits and thinks,” I’ll sit here because I love talking to her!” I live alone and I talk to one person mainly if I talk to anyone at all as far as in person conversations. It’s a pretty quiet life here in my four walls.

Earlier in the year, I had met my next door neighbor, a sweet lady, not far from my age and single, and as time has passed, we have had our social distancing chats from our front porches. She has invited me in a few times and so for me; I chat away.

Lately, I have had a lot on my mind with my upcoming lease. The management has raised my rent thirty dollars after my first month here and my life insurance also went up to thirty dollars per month.

It scares the hell out of me because I barely made it this past year, but I did make it and most likely I will just eat less to make it this year. The problem lays then with the fact that apart from speaking to God about my worries, I have been talking about my worries to my neighbor.

When our conversations are over, I come back inside and kick myself because no one wants the burden of having to listen to other’s problems. We are all suffering in some form, especially this year.

I yell at myself, “Stop talking young lady. Just keep quiet and talk about the surface chat!” I have pondered on the idea of just being polite when I see her and go about my business and not be too friendly. It will save me and her sanity.

I realize it is out of no one to talk to that I so easily chat my head off. Why can’t I just be quiet and keep life to myself like most people do………………..