I have always struggled with night time eating. I know, keep busy they say, but I think about it each night until I finally give in. Some evenings I need to eat because my diabetic sugars are too low and I need to keep them up during the night. Other evenings I crave salt so badly, and I think that my body must need salt as I don’t add table salt or use table salt.
I have been placed on every restriction, I swear, by my doctor throughout the years. Low carbs, no salt, no sugar, no wheat flour, watch the potassium because I have had it at a dangerous level, although for the last six months it is back in the normal range. Watch your magnesium, oh yes, have had to and still am taking supplements, which didn’t help too much, so now back to my milk of magnesium, taking one T. every evening before bed.
Gee, I don’t think there is any other restrictions. I try very hard to keep carbs at 25-30 grams per meal and have a snack at bedtime if need be, to no more than 15 carbs. I often wonder since I am a diabetic which is more important to watch, carbs, sugar or calories. I don’t count calories and I know about every food I eat how much carbs and sugars are in them.
Here’s where you come in. If you have any advice, based on your own experience on how to do better, figuring out what goes in my mouth, please share with me and if you can suggest a filling and good night-time snack, please share. Oh, I thought of something I should add. Cholesterol has been an issue for about six months. I exchanged my butter out for a margarine with no cholesterol, boy do I miss the butter flavor, and the other thing is, if I eat fruits at all, I can have only one half of a banana or one small apple. Any other fruit sends my sugars over the roof.
Thank you ahead of time because I know, someone is going to help me out here.
Sometimes the internet was the nicest invention ever. I can remember that not that long ago, it cost money to call someone out of your area. Then cell phones came along and that old theory vanished. We were all able to quit worrying about cost because of Facebook chatting and our pocket phones, we could talk to anyone and even pick our own friends.
I was never the one who went to parties much or social events. I did go to quite a fewsocial gatherings the last few years, but I wasn’t interested in socializing. I was only interested in my camera and finding interesting things and people to photograph. I still try to do what I can but it’s usually from a passenger side of a car.
Having friends is important to me but it isn’t my goal in life. I have one very close friend that has chosen to remain friends with me for over forty years. I hate the thought of either of us not being here on earth. I don’t know what I would do without her.
Facebook Messenger was the coolest thing to me when it began. If I liked postings from a particular person, I would begin a conversation with them. I have friends now, that would be called cyber friends all over the world, probably the same with you.
In fact, some of my cyber friends, I met when my brother was ill and those friends and I have remained friends ever since, so I think that would be eight years now. Not too bad considering most of them and I have never met, not that I wouldn’t love to meet each one.
I have friends in Australia and Italy and within the United Sates along with London too. I am very fond of and proud to call them my friends. I also am able to learn about their culture instead of reading a book about it. First hand is always nice, don’t you think?
I used to have this friend here on my blogging site. Her name was Sandra Callahoun. I loved her as my friend. We wrote back and forth daily at least once. She shared her courage and her love for her family. I got to know her heart. Unfortunately her heart was not in good shape and that eventually took her from me and sent her into God’s arms where he could love and care for her at all times. I miss her still today but one day will see her again.
Another nice thing about the internet is you don’t have to mess with those that you don’t find in your favor. You just click and block. Of course there are always going to be those spammers and there are thousands of ads trying to win your money over, but in general, if you are picky like me, you can find very nice people online, and hey, if you are looking for a partner in your life; I bet you can find him/her in time also.
So what about you? Do you have friends online or in cyber space that you love dearly? Where are they from and how long have you been friends? Did you meet your partner online?
I wish, when I was young, that I had a built a boat-load of confidence in life and myself, but I didn’t. I hate it that still today, I strive to be all that I can for others and always forget that I am far from perfect. I have friends on here that seem to have it all.
A good childhood, a positive and productive adult life, courage to admit their wrongs and proud of their rights. I am very proud of my friends that have included me in their lives.
I try, I try to hard to not beat myself up for my flaws, but I fail so often. I talk to God about it, I have sought help in learning to accept myself, and still I fail. I think some days that this is why I try so hard to at least make others smile.
The first word that is spoken to me, that is negative; I run away with my tail between my legs.
I have to stop. I really do. I don’t want to go to my grave with this hanging on my soul, but how do I do this? How do I erase words and feelings from earlier days? I pump myself up so much and then I deflate in a matter of seconds.
My doctor calls this depression and I don’t know; maybe he has something there. All I know, is I want it to stop. I am who I am, but I’m still learning.
Somehow when I was outside last evening, a pesky fly flew in. I got up this morning and when I went to the bathroom, there he was, already to chat with me. That made me think about things I heard in the past.
“If a fly enters your home in the Fall, money will come your way.”
Well, it isn’t Fall yet, so no money to come my way. I have to smile when I think of all the years that have passed by. Where has the time gone? Is there anything I haven’t done yet that I have wanted to do?
Believe it or not, I have not ridden a fair ride since my early twenties. I have a friend who is constantly at me to join in the fun at places like Cedar Point. I have no interest. I don’t know if it is because I am older, or since I have never been, I have no desire on what I haven’t done.
I have wanted to live in Tennessee, it seems forever. I had the chance at one point, but my brother and I chose another state, due to health reasons. I really didn’t care for Florida that much. Oh it’s a great place to visit or live in the winter, but the summer’s are just too darn hot. I remember, if we went to the grocery store, we had foam coolers in our car trunk. All cold and frozen items went in there because if you had any other errands to run, you could count on cold items being spoiled and frozen items starting to thaw. I just don’t care for that ungodly heat. I lived in Sarasota, Florida with my brother. As his health became worse, this is why we moved back home to Indiana. I provided you a link to the city we lived in.
The saying is as we age, we get set in our ways. I know for myself, I like my morning routine and I can ruin or continue with my day. I guess I am set in some ways too. How easy is change for you now that you are no longer a teen?
She stepped out into dusk. Moisture filled her nostrils and the sounds of crickets tickled her ears. Fall was coming and the darkness that appeared earlier was proof that the seasons were about to change.
The evening reminded her of an old show that her parents used to watch on the television; dark evening, man with trench coat and rimmed hat standing under the street lamp, fog whispering in the air.
She had forgotten to check on her flowers and it wasn’t completely taken over with darkness and she leaned down to them and asked them if they were thirsty. In her mind, she heard them murmur yes, so she went back inside her home and filled her watering can with lukewarm water. She took it outside and one by one, she began quenching their thirst to live.
She felt something touch her almost naked foot, as all she had on her feet at this time of night, were her comfy flip-flops . She assumed it was those pesky mosquitoes and shook her foot lightly to sway them to leave and go elsewhere; but when she lowered her foot back on solid ground, the grasp took hold firmer and wouldn’t let go.
It was too dark to actually see what had reached out and touched her. She immediately quit watering her plants because the fear she allowed to come to life, had caused her hands to let go of the handle, spilling the little bit of remaining water.
She tried to turn around and walk towards the door but it was as if a ball and chain had attached itself to her foot, and she became a cemented statue.She began breathing harder as whatever had attacked her was climbing up her body. It had reached her leg and then wrapped itself around her crotch area and up towards her waist. It twisted and bound itself tight against her arms, holding her together as a mummy.
Her breath was slightly frozen and as she tried to struggle free, the wrapping became tighter. Tears began to stream from her eyes and thoughts immediately filled her with seeing her own death. Was this how she was going to die? Out here alone, in the dark, no one near by to see what was happening?
Where was her cell phone? Perhaps she could call 911, but she realized in the next moment that would be impossible as she couldn’t move her hands and her mouth was taped with something that she couldn’t describe any better than a feeling of sticklers being prodded into her lips and skin.
What seemed to last for hours, actually lasted no longer than ten minutes. As quick as she was bound, she was loosened. The bandages fell away and the spikes left her skin, only leaving traces of pale red, where the skin had not been poked profusely.
She moved her heavy legs in a backwards position and her hand was on the door to her home. She suddenly heard a raspy voice speak to her. “How does it feel to be starving for water, to be so quenched for a drink, that you feel your life actually draining from your veins lady? How did it feel? Did you like what we put you through? Just remember lady, it’s summer. It’s hot and humid. We are your responsibility during these hot months. Don’t forget to water us. Don’t you ever forget again. Every day lady, we depend on you.” She nodded her head in agreement as she looked down at her plants and she felt so ashamed because she had actually forgotten to water them two days in a row.
Being a Senior citizen, I still am trying to figure out who I am. Isn’t that just plain crazy? By now, I should know my likes and dislikes, what makes me angry and what makes me smile.
I pretty much do know what sets me off. I almost can use the word, demand, because that is what I like in my daily life living. I demand as much as possible, peace. A peace that is silent but allows noise when I am ready.
I think part of the reason I am like this is age related but I find that my Parkinsonism and Ataxia do not like stressful situations, and I learned that quick so peace is now my middle name.
Another thing I know about myself is I love helping others. I may be able to only offer a leaning ear or a gentle hug, but to me, I want you to know, that I truly care from my heart.
I wish I could do something at home to give me a little spending money. I don’t have a four year degree nor a certificate. I went to nursing school but my brother’s health became more important to me than a license and now, today, college has become too costly for someone my age to reap the benefits and pay back loans.
Do you feel like you have missed out on any opportunities in your life but you know in your heart, it is too late now?
Who I am 