Chapter Thirty-Nine

From the author. These chapters I have written is what I have dealt with for most of my teen years and up. These chapters are what has made me who I am today. Sometimes on sad or low days, I will still question myself on the most important topic; What’s wrong with me, that two mothers didn’t want me.

I will be jumping ahead because from the time of that day when my real mother tried to get in the house and see me until my teens and grown-up years, most of it is a blur still.

I remember when I was thirteen, my grandmother explaining to me how rotten my real mother was. I had never seen my mother throughout those empty years and I couldn’t believe what was being said right now to me.

In my mind, hearing these nasty comments, I was defending mama, as even at thirteen, I understood life enough to know it had to be so hard to try to raise two kids when she was but a kid herself.

This is the point of my life when I made the decision and got the determination to find her once again. I was going to find out why these comments were being said and where she was living and why she never came back to see me when I turned sixteen. She had promised my mother that she would be back when I turned sixteen. I waited all day on my birthday and cried myself to sleep.

I didn’t get my answers that I longed for until I turned thirty-six years old.

To be continued…