Comfort Zone

Why didn’t she go? Why did she stay and take the abuse? Okay, maybe it wasn’t physical abuse; but isn’t mental and emotional abuse just as bad? Me, myself, I think mental abuse is so much more worse. Pain fades and words remain forever.

Leah couldn’t go. She was forced into a mental trap all her own. She had the right timing presented to her. She could have packed her bags, stored her belongings, and went to a brand new location with a close friend, so why didn’t she?

Comfort Zone; this is why she stayed behind. So you ask, what is a comfort zone?

Comfort zone is described as;

This article is about the psychological meaning. For other uses, see comfort zone (disambiguation).

The comfort zone is a psychological state in which a person feels familiar, at ease, in control and experiences low anxiety and stress. In the zone a steady level of performance is possible.[1]

Bardwick defines the term as “a behavioral state where a person operates in an anxiety-neutral position.”[2] Brown describes it as “Where our uncertainty, scarcity and vulnerability are minimized — where we believe we’ll have access to enough love, food, talent, time, admiration. Where we feel we have some control.


Leah was terrified of giving up all she was used to. She knew how to react when she was torn down; naked with his words. She knew how long HE would stay angry. She knew that if things got real bad, there was a police station nearby and she also had her car.

Leah sat many days crying into her pillow, wishing she would have gone, and feeling too much of a coward to make that phone call. What if she did call? Maybe she and her friendship would be ruined by too close quarters.

Maybe she wouldn’t have the money to be able to take care of herself if she didn’t find a job. Sure, her friend had told her over and over; jobs are easy to snag with your experience. Yet, here she sat, alone, lonely, sometimes feeling like a used dish rag.

One day arrived when the sun wasn’t shining. HE had been out too late the evening before. HE had drank too much, stating this is the only way he knew how to unwind. Leah sat at the kitchen table drinking her third cup of coffee, when HE got up to use the bathroom.

The dog began to bark, letting his owner know he was ready to play. After coming out of the bathroom, HE suddenly kicked the dog. The dog yelped. Leah stood up and went to rescue him.

HE didn’t like all the noise. When HE saw Leah coming he let her get close enough and then he punched her, flinging her body up against the wall. Darkness over came her and she went limp to the floor. The dog hid under the bed, and HE went back to his room and slammed the door.

The mailman was knocking on the screen door. He had a signature  paper with him that one of the adults needed to sign. He knocked a couple of times and then heard Leah’s voice. He tried the door latch and it opened.

Upon seeing her, he called the EMS. HE was arrested and Leah was taken to the Emergency room. After being tested she was released, but no one was there to pick her up. She had no one to call.

She sat down on the curb outside the hospital and wept, wishing she had made different choices in her life. It was then that she saw two pennies, heads face up near her. She picked them up and held them tightly in her hands, and she began to pray.

It was less than a half an hour that the mailman stopped back by to check on her. He saw her crying. “What is wrong Miss? Can I do something to help? Are you okay”?

Leah took out a small notebook from her purse. She flipped the pages until she came to the right place. She handed him the page, pointing to the number. He took out his phone and called the number.

(This story, my friends is a fictional story. I wrote this because so many women feel like they can’t make a change because of fear of leaving their comfort zone. If you recognize yourself in this, you are not alone. If you feel all alone, you are not. Make a call, call a friend, a minister, family, or police. There is help.)

Oh, you ask what happened to Leah? The number that was dialed was her best friend. She is now living happily with her friend in a location miles from her old home, doing very well at her new job.




Scary Dreams

It was about six months ago when I experienced nightmares on a daily basis. Up until the last three days, I have been dream-free. Night one, I don’t remember. Night two was silly. Last night was scary.

I am not sure what is happening in my head; but I hope it stops soon.

I dreamed I was at my parents property. I knew in my dream that my parents and brother no longer lived there. I remember getting ready to get dressed and I had my camera, cell and clean clothes all laid out.

I had turned and left the room for some reason and when I returned; my cell and camera were gone. I somehow jumped to a new scene and can remember a dark, scary looking man coming towards me. He looked as if he was a foreigner and maybe someone I had seen on the television these past few weeks.

He stopped and asked me if I was alright. I told  him what had happened and he said, “Your possessions are being held captive. You are not allowed to have any link to outside of this property”.

The next thing I remember is me looking outside the windows of the barn? Yes, I was in a barn, very similar to my parents barn. I could see my parents home and in my dream I had no problem recognizing their property.

I became frantic. I needed my cell to call for help and I felt lost without my camera. I went looking for help and stumbled into this section of the barn, where men with gruesome masks sat.

They asked me what I wanted. I told them I was looking for my items. The leader nudged a servant? and the servant took me aside, explaining why I couldn’t have my belongings.

He took his knife out of its holder and touched my hand gently, as if he was pondering on whether to rape me or not. The knife went too deep and he cut my thumb. It left a straight line of blood dripping. The blood turned black and the servant jumped back with a look of fear on his face.

“What is it that you wish for? What items are you looking for”? This is what he kept repeating to me. I told  him and he led me to a tiny, padded room and opened up one of the dirty cabinet doors. He handed me my two items and said, “Go, leave and don’t come back. The mark of black blood gives you many more powers over us”.

I turned and scrambled out the door and realized I was miles from the city. I had no way to escape. I again stared out windows, searching for answers, when I saw many vehicles parked in the yard.

One of them was a white camper with a gold streak down the side. I recognized it immediately as my fathers. I raced from room to room and then I  spotted him. I quickly made my way to his side. He was holding small trinkets in his hands.

He looked at me and smiled saying, “This is going to be a fine auction. Look at these bargains I have bought”. I explained in a hurried voice, “Daddy, take me out of here. We have to go right now”.

He did as I requested,(rare, but this was a dream) and we left in his camper. I turned around to watch as the property became smaller and smaller in my eyes. My mind was racing and I was trying to calm down, realizing I was going to be safe.

Suddenly the camper started to swerve on the road. Crossing the middle line over and over. I yelled out to my dad, “Are you alright? You are going all over the road”? He didn’t answer me.

I walked up to the driver’s seat and it was empty. My father was no where to be found.

When I woke up from my dream, my immediate thought was ,my daddy was an angel watching over me and he had rescued me from a bad place; but it was up to me to build my future.

I am not sure what this all means, but I wish it wouldn’t have happened; my friends. Dreams can be fun and loving, filled with good memories, or something like this; scary.


(This is a true story)


The Victim

He was the misfit boy
Never spending time
No one being kind
Didn’t stay in line.
Ignored by most
Parents didn’t care
Going everywhere
A life he didn’t share.
One day he couldn’t resist
He screamed and threw a fit
He scared those around a bit
It seemed like he was lit.
A bad cop took notice
He took out his knife
He tased the man twice
Bullets took the victim’s life.
Written by,
Terry Shephed

Cling Together

Cling Together


Shootings, rapists
Killers too
We’re in trouble
Me and you.
Terrorists here
And everywhere
Willing to snuff
Your life out bare.
We, the people
Can’t be afraid
Let’s join together
Form a strong parade.
Don’t care what tongue
You speak from me
Let’s hold our hands
Praying fervently.
Let our words
Go to heaven above
Show God sincerity,
Our strength, our love.
Written by,
Terry Shepherd

So Many Questions, One Answer

For you who do not believe in God nor Satan; you may not like my post. For those who do believe; I have to speak my feelings.

I live in northern Indiana; not far from South Bend and Chicago. There isn’t a day that goes by that the local news doesn’t report at least one shooting. The sad thing is, I am not shocked.

What does shock me is; the young ages of children who have guns in their possession and are shooting and sometimes fatally shooting lives. Why do they have these guns? Where are the parents? Why doesn’t the parents know where their children are?

Why does Satan get to run rabid through our country? Why are so many college females getting raped? Why are the rapist not getting the correct course of action served? How can judges  lean left or right in order to save a soul who has good grades, or a sports player?

Why did the Orlando, Florida shooting take place? Was it because the shooter was a crime hater against gays? Was he on drugs? Was he drunk?

Why can’t people get along as God put us here to do? Why do we have to select friends, work places, transportation services, according to color of skin, location of housing? A couple of reasons may be safety or racism.

I can only speak on my own bringing up. I believe Satan has taken over in a lot of areas in our world. I believe God is watching and waiting to rescue those of us who love and believe in him with all our heart and soul.

I am  guilty of not agreeing with all the changes of equal this or that in today’s world. I may not do a 100% job of speaking out about God. I may not step up to the plate as I should. I do believe that shooting, taking someone’s life, fear, someone taking a piece of our body  by force is wrong.

We have all types living among us. I am so sorry for the loss of each life taken and injured in Orlando, along with children, parents, elderly abuse. I agree that no one, no matter what, has the right to do take other people’s lives. This is God’s business, not ours.

I believe that we as believers in God need to stand together, pray for the coming of the Lord, and hold  tight to our faith.

My thoughts are spoken, and my views are shared. Thank-you for reading.


god crying

Do The Right Thing

I don’t usually post or share too many things on Facebook that have to do with animals. I am more about sharing and posting; trying to be a support system for people with MSA. Today, for some reason, I did.

I saw many animal videos, and they weren’t all cute and adorable. One was a cat, which was a pretty cute video. The cat was nice and healthy. It was more a video about how the cat was talking to its owner. It was waiting to be let inside and it was sitting on the top step, looking in the glass door. It was meowing to a tune of Let me in, let me in.

There were other videos of abused dogs, where firemen had saved them, and I saw videos of dogs who weren’t so lucky to be saved. Seeing so many videos drew me to write this post tonight. These videos were not pretty or cute.

Pets don’t ask to come live with us. We invite and take them in. When they are babies, they have the cutest faces and bodies. As they grow and pick-up not so good of habits, such as chewing our shoes, or barking too much; we suddenly don’t think of them as cuties anymore.

What happens is the ignoring stage. Put the animal(s) outside, shut in a room, anything to get them out of sight for just a short while. Before you know it, we develop our own nasty habits of ignoring and abuse of animals.

What I have to say is DON’T. Don’t do this to animals. If you change your mind about that cute little pet, look for a new home for him or her. Don’t hit it, or starve it, or worse yet, pretend they don’t exist.

To those who suspect there is animal cruelty in any form going on, please report it to your Animal shelter, sheriff or police department.  They deserve to be treated with love and respect, just as you expect this same treatment from other humans.



Twin brothers RonaldRonnieKray (24 October 1933 – 17 March 1995) and ReginaldReggieKray (24 October 1933 – 1 October 2000) were English gangsters who were the foremost perpetrators of organized crime in the East End of London during the 1950s and 1960s. With their gang, the Firm, the Krays were involved in armed robberies, arson, protection rackets, assaults, and the murders of Jack “the Hat” McVitie and George Cornell.

As West End nightclub owners, they mixed with politicians and prominent entertainers such as Diana Dors, Frank Sinatra, and Judy Garland. The Krays were much feared within their milieu; in the 1960s, they became celebrities, even being photographed by David Bailey and interviewed on television.

They were arrested on 9 May 1968 and convicted in 1969, by the efforts of detectives led by Detective Superintendent Leonard “Nipper” Read. Both were sentenced to life imprisonment. Ronnie remained in Broadmoor Hospital until his death on 17 March 1995; Reggie was released from prison on compassionate grounds in August 2000, eight weeks before his death from cancer.

Reggie (left) and Ronnie Kray
Born 24 October 1933
Hoxton, London, England
Died Ronnie:
17 March 1995 (aged 61)
Wexham, Buckinghamshire, England
1 October 2000 (aged 66)
Norwich, Norfolk, England
Cause of death Heart attack (Ronnie)
Cancer (Reggie)
Other names Ronnie & Reggie
Occupation Club owners, gangsters
Criminal status Both deceased
Spouse(s) Reggie:
Frances Shea (m. 1965; her death 1967)
Roberta Jones (m. 1997; his death 2000)[1][2]
Elaine Mildener (m. 1985; div. 1989)[3]
Kate Howard (m. 1989; div. 1994)[3]



As you can see; the word I made up today is real. Kray is the word, and this is what I found. Wow, these two were something else!


A Crime is a Crime is a Crime

I am eating my supper and reading my emails. I get email alerts from our home town news. I gulped on my piece of toast and almost choked as I read the reason someone was arrested.

During my own younger and middle-age days I have seen this same thing done and so much laughter and chasing each other around the room trying to get them back. Never in my wildest dreams did I think anyone could be charged or arrested for it.

I believe in reporting crime. I believe in reporting abuse, any type of abuse; but this; I would not consider it abuse; but then again, I am looking back on the old days where pranks and laughter were are part of our lives.

Here is the article;

SHELTON, CT — A Connecticut man was arrested Tuesday, Aug. 4, for allegedly giving a four year old child a “wet willy.”

According to police, Michael Migani, 34, stuck his finger in his mouth, then put it in the child’s ear in the presence of the boy’s mother. The child had been playing with his mother in the waiting room of a business when the incident occurred.

Authorities say Migani fled in his car when the mother and business employees confronted him about the incident. Police officers later stopped him.

Migani is charged with second degree breach of peace and second degree reckless endangerment. He was released on $500 bond and will appear in court Aug. 19.

model 30



I trusted you!

You said it,

The same words

Came spewing out.

No one loves you

More than me.

Then daddy why?

How could you?

It hurt bad daddy.

You told me

You loved me.

Now today I

Am shattered, as if

Looking into an old mirror.

Reflections of your eyes

Look back at me.

Pain from years gone by

Still twist in my heart.

The rubber band

Is broken daddy,

And you broke it.

You broke me.

Why daddy, why?

Written by,

Terry  Shepherd





Between Facebook and other social media I have been not so privileged to look at graphic photos and bold statements about police abusing citizens. I have read many comments dealing with defending or criticizing our police.

I can remember when I was a small kid, the schools taught us that the men in uniform were our friends. I learned that if I was ever in trouble, I could look for that policeman and he would keep me protected.

For the very first time I saw actual facts being told on the local news this morning. The story went something like this;

On a city block where mainly colored folks lived, many had been outside visiting with each other. They then noticed a police officer running past their area and he was chasing a suspect.

When the police didn’t gain control over the one running, a female, pregnant bystander started laughing out loud. The police man didn’t like it and came up to the pregnant lady and hit her according to the victim on the news, as hard as he could with his right hand in her stomach.

The pregnant lady is 8 months along. She then stated and had many eye witnesses to the hitting and words that followed some racial slurs. This incident sent the victim to the hospital for 5 hours of observation.

After the policeman stopped talking the victim pointed out the camera up on the building that was recording everything being done. The victim proceeded to let us news watchers understand his next actions.

The victim said the officer became very quiet and had a look on his face that expressed he had really screwed up. His parnter(s) who were standing near by were said to be watching with questions in their eyes on why this officer did and said what he did; but they did nothing to step in.

The newscaster said that they had reached out by phone and text for a comment on the video that captured everything, but no one has responded to them as of yet.

This is the closest I have been to believing that this may really have happened. I don’t know if this and many other episodes is all about being racist, or power over the people, or maybe Satan at work. I don’t have the answers. I will say one thing, with bad people imitating policemen in cars to lure ladies, or beating or hitting any person, and killing with ease;  I would definitely not teach my son or daughter to look for the nice policeman in the blue hat and shirt with the shiny badge; not in today’s world.