We all go through each day following our plan or out of habit, but what is one thing you do think of each day?
Well, Halloween is over and suddenly, Christmas is in all the stores. Christmas commercials have been seen on the television and people are beginning to think about the upcoming holiday and a few are starting to decorate.
With today’s weather here in Indiana, it seems like summer is still here. I will definitely enjoy these next few days of warm temperatures, but, no matter what the weather, the calendar says we are heading into winter.
What happened to Thanksgiving? Here in Indiana, there is talk on the media that we should do virtual Thanksgiving. My son says we are doing real Thanksgiving, just like other years and I agree, unless someone becomes ill.
What about you? Are you concerned about the upcoming holidays, along with travel and being in one house with many people? Let me know.
Photo taken by me.
I have hesitated for awhile now in writing on my blog, only because my life seems the same today or yesterday. Then I thought; well maybe someone eles’s life is boring too and mine may be something different to read.
I don’t get out too much anymore because I have too many health issues that make doing trips not so much fun; but when I do, I take great notice in the changing of colors here in my area in the trees. I am just blown away how beautiful Fall is and I think God is just the smartest man ever, especially when he knew some of us didn’t like the cold winters coming, so he created a gorgeous Fall to come before the cold.
I have taken a lot of photos of the trees, as you probably realize since you have followed my blog for some time. I love the camera. So many times I take a photo and a few moments later that picture I saw is no longer there.
I have put out some Halloween decorations and plan on being involved this weekend with the Trick-or treat walk in our neighborhood. I am giving out single-wrapped granola bars. I hope the kids like them and I believe they will not be a Covid-19 threat to anyone. I have always enjoyed this time of year but I have to admit, I have had to push myself especially this year to get involved. I really believe this worldly virus has played some heavy attacks on our minds.
As I listen to the news, I am sad to hear that the virus is beginning to peak again here in Indiana, and already, the hospitals are seeing more cases. I wonder if we will go backwards, and start shutting the state down again.
The virus is hope to be beaten by a vaccine maybe by the end of this year. When it will be ready for all Americans; I don’t know. I am a skeptic though. I want proof. I want to see many people not have deep side-effects from this vaccine, so who is going to go first? Someone has to, I just don’t want it to be me. What about you? Are you a skeptic or are you eager to jump right in there and be one of the first?
The strangest things pop in my head at times. I blame this on the fact that I am a constant thinker. I actually was in the ladies’ room and was sitting on the throne. I looked at the shower curtain as I probably do most times, but saw things I hadn’t seen before.
I bought this shower curtain three weeks ago. It is in the blue hues and is checkered. It isn’t anything fancy and was a product of WalMart. Suddenly I took notice of the inside of the checker pattern. There is scribbles of a gold enhancer so it is supposed to look like water trickling down the curtain but I saw something different. I saw crosses. Yes, there was a cross in each square, all in gold. I had no problem detailing each one and as you looked outside of the checks, you could see straight lines along with wrinkles from how the curtain rest against the tub.
I was putting a puzzle together. I saw my life as I walked down the straight and narrow, sometimes running into bumps but, always ahead, I could see the gold cross. I knew that I was not alone on this travel called life. God is always with me and beside me. He is right there for you and for me. He is only waiting for us to seek him out.
Isn’t that good to know? With the changes in our world today, that aren’t all good, we can count on not being alone. This brings me inner peace. With this pandemic, it is easy to feel very alone, but we aren’t. When you can see the proof in a cheap, WalMart shower curtain, you know that God is real. Hugs everyone.
Photo taken by me.
What do you do when you are fighting symptoms that will remain with you until death and you discover another soul in life needs your help? You pray. Yes, you pray. When you have gone the routes that I and most others have taken first, which is to figure things out yourself and then you realize you are not staying ahead of the game, you finally remember to turn to the one who will answer all of your prayers; God.
I am in that position now. Strength and will power, an inner drive to be of help to others does take its toll on a body and yet you want and at times need to push forward. Every day there is a lost soul somewhere, maybe standing or sitting right next to you. Many have too much pride to ask for help so they continue to suffer.
When the opportunity rises and you can be of help to another but you just don’t think you have the energy or the time, turn to God and ask him to help you. This is our job here on earth. It is what God wants us to do. Love and be kind to others. Talk to them about God and help them get to the point where Jesus heals them in the only way he knows best.
I will continue to pray and do what I know needs to be done. It does me good to be there for others and it takes my mind off of my own aches and pains and life’s daily problems.
I have gotten in the habit of spending my evenings watching McCleouds Daughters. It’s and eight series show that is on Hulu. I am on the fifth series now. It is about a horse farm and the four women who run it. All sorts of things happen on this show, good and sad things.
I love these farm, horse shows. It not only is good and clean watching, it takes up my evenings. Have you ever seen it? If not, maybe you can start watching it. I also love Heartland. It is pretty similar. I just don’t want these series to end.
Next, I am looking forward to watch the holiday shows and movies.
A question I have for you. I am going to be staying home and passing trick or treats to the kids that live out here. They are having a Halloween walk throughout the complex. With the virus still being active, what is a good treat to hand out that keeps all safe and happy?
2001 ‧ Drama ‧ 8 seasons
I wrote yesterday about my chaotic week. Full of hurt and loss from loved ones. After repeating to myself over and over, See through your eyes Lord, Hear through your ears, Love through your heart; I am more calm this morning.
I can not control how I am feeling in my heart from people’s actions but I can control how I let it affect me. There is nothing worse than being un-friended by a loved one or knowing there is an issue but the other person won’t allow you to know what it is.
What can I do about it? Pray, give it to God, let him deal with it. He knows how to fix things. The other thing I do when I get to bombarded by the “stuff” in this world is look for something that makes just me happy, and this is what I did.
I went to my favorite second-hand store. I looked at everything, knowing I had a budget I had to stick to. I saw this piece that I had been wanting for about a month. Every time I went inside this store, there it sat.
Yesterday, I decided; this would make me smile. This would make me feel good every time I went into my bathroom, which is where I placed my new piece. Here is a photo of it and yes, I am still smiling over it.
It is about four foot tall. It is slender which fits my bathroom perfect. I filled it with toilet paper and soaps. I love it. Of course I love old things. What do you think? Do you like it? Do you ever buy yourself treats when life gets you down? Does it help when you do?
Sometimes I write to show you something and sometimes I write for my own healing. Today is the latter reason; for my own healing.
I used to be so bubbly. I was always ready to go somewhere and laugh tons and enjoy the day. I don’t know what has happened to me.
If I am in a crowd of people; I want to be home sooner than later. I used to sit and listen to people talk and tell their stories but anymore I have learned these stories cause some pain because of plain, old gossip.
I used to jump up and eat and get dressed and put the make-up on; not anymore. I do feel awesome when I first wake up. I feel little pain. I give my thanks to God for this day. I would rather now take my time and I discovered this past few months, that not long after I am awake; I could go back to sleep if time allowed.
I don’t cry. I haven’t cried since my brother passed almost five years ago. I think between losing him and my dad; I just cried all my tears until they are permanently dried up.
I volunteer each week. I love it but I find myself almost wishing I didn’t have to get up and go. Once I am on my way; I am good to go.
People get on my nerves so much anymore and that used to never happen. I was always a people person.
I have a few excuses as to why this change has happened. Winter? It’s always a long winter here in Northern Indiana. Shorter days of light? Maybe. The place I live in? Perhaps. I was told by the manager at the time I applied that this building was really hopping.
All sorts of activities to attend, friendly people. This has not proved to be the case as now living here for two years, what I mainly see is a variety of people. Senior Citizens live here. Disabled adults live here. Mentally challenged people live here.
This leads to a variety of things to see on a daily basis. In fact, I just saw a post taped to an escape door on my floor. “If we see such and such, please don’t let him in.” This happens so much here.
There are illegal activities here almost daily. Maybe this is another reason I hibernate in my room. I posted this topic before and had a reference made back to me that this is happening everywhere. If it truly is then this is a sad state of world we live in.
Maybe I am just plain living in the fifties. I shouldn’t be of course. I was born in the fifties. Maybe I should take that back and say sixties. I would just love to live in an area that is safe, an area that doesn’t reach below freezing for most of the winter.
I think about moving farther down in Indiana and then I instantly think of my kids. Nope, can’t do it. I tried it different times in earlier years and always came back home. I am telling you though; this weather, this cold and frigid weather hurts my body and mind and spirit.
I don’t know what’s wrong with me anymore. I just know, that I don’t have that bright spirit. I could sleep and hibernate for days upon in and yet I don’t like this at all.
Well, I don’t know if you can relate. I don’t even know if I helped heal myself. I just know I need a change. Lord help me figure this out.
I woke-up early in a good mood. After sitting in bed a few minutes I decided I really wasn’t ready to get up. I laid back down and slept another hour. This time I had to get up and was ready also.
I took my shot and my medications then drank my first cup of coffee. I turned on a movie that I had seen last night on the news. It was called, Abducted Twice in Daylight; I think. It was about this small town where everyone knew and were good friends.
A neighbor and his family had moved in next door. The two families became close friends, sharing their lives together like most neighbors do. What happened from there, didn’t really shock me but I was more into what is going on in the minds of sick people. It was a movie I watched to the end.
I don’t know if I have ever been that trusting in my entire life to have made some of the decisions these parents of the kidnapped girl did. Maybe I have a more suspicious mind. It seems to me that in this movie, things would have got nipped in the bud long before people’s lives got hurt. You will have to check this movie out and let me know what you think.
The next thing I did was get dressed and put on some make-up. I have been applying make-up to cover some of the age spots I have. I have always had a fear of dying and getting old. Don’t ask me why. I already know I am going to heaven and I realize I can’t stop the process.
I went into the bathroom and tried to do something with my hair. I actually hate my hair cut I got a few months back. It didn’t turn out like I wanted at all. I may have already mentioned this in a prior post, but after the hair cut cutting began; I learned the stylist was new. A nightmare is what I call it. It can only grow out in my opinion.
I used a mirror to see the back of my hair in the bigger mirror. I almost fell over and I felt my jaw drop big. What I saw was this hugs area of small thinning, maybe bald spots. Oh my gosh. I am getting old.
Instantly, any good thoughts about how I looked at myself were gone. I wanted to change my clothes back to bed clothes and hide under my covers. My opinion of myself as being outgoing and not too bad looking for almost being 65, and the thoughts that there are others heavier than me, came tumbling down like and eruption of boulders falling to the road.
I did the best that I could. I decided then and there I would not color my hair a darker shade anymore. I would let it go back to its natural blonde. This way the baldness wouldn’t be so bold.
I put everything away, and got me a cup of coffee. Here I set at the computer talking to you and yet my heart is still sinking and my self-worth is almost shot. I always wanted to be accepted, a thing from my childhood. I always wanted people to know that I was a compassionate, caring and empathetic woman. Why in the world do I want to hide myself now over bald spots?