What a windy, chilly day. For the next few days we, here in Indiana, will be experiencing some last taste of winter. Frost over night and cooler days in the day hours. Spring has taken a hard road to reach us here in the Midwest, but I believe that it will remain and turn those buds into blossoms and the flowers into those we can smile at.
I had a comment earlier from a dear friend AR. She…
What a windy, chilly day. For the next few days we, here in Indiana, will be experiencing some last taste of winter. Frost over night and cooler days in the day hours. Spring has taken a hard road to reach us here in the Midwest, but I believe that it will remain and turn those buds into blossoms and the flowers into those we can smile at.
I had a comment earlier from a dear friend AR. She mentioned something about Moving Towards the Light. It caught and held my attention. Moving towards the light. It rolls smoothly from my tongue.
Each of us, no matter who we are, are moving towards that light or the last days of our lives. It seems that it is miles away for some. For others, it starts to enter our mind as we age. With me turning the big 60 yesterday I thought about it.
Actually, I pondered on it much more when Al was still with me. He cried out so many times that he wanted to go home. To the stranger listening to this, they may have wondered what do you mean go home? You are home.
This is a temporary home we live in. An earth where we make choices. We live good and bad lives. We choose to drink or not, smoke or not, steal or not. So many choices, and some we make without thinking twice.
But when I look back at Al, he knew which home he wanted to go to. He wanted the mansion in the sky. The healing of Jesus, the pain-free body. I have no doubt Al believed in God and I am quite sure he is walking with Jesus right now.
Many times I look up to the heavens and if I am quiet, I can feel his warm smile upon me. I can sometimes hear his voice in my mind letting me know he is just fine, and he is saving that special spot for me.
Without realizing it we move through this dark world struggling to see the light of it. There isn’t really any reason not to enjoy each day we are gifted. There isn’t a valid reason for us to ponder on the what ifs.
I know God is in charge of my life because I asked him to be. If he can provide food for the birds, than certainly he will see that I am always fed. If he can heal the blind or forgive the prostitute then he will care for me. All I have to do is ask him for his help, tell him I love him, trust in him, and enjoy the days he has granted me.
I have a job to do while I breathe this air. I have my own desires and wishes, but God knows the perfect job I must perform. So as I walk and breathe and I inch closer to the light, I promise myself to trust more in God and to walk towards the light with a softer step.
I don’t often speak of God in a topic that is so large. So many points to listen to. Arguments have broken out over this subject matter, but today, I feel compelled. I feel led to speak what is on my mind.
Thanks to Al’s illness I have grown much closer to God than ever. Not to say that it was easy. There were many times I was angry at God. So many questions I would yell out to him. When I get to heaven I will know all the answers; but maybe it won’t be necessary to understand all the details. Maybe once I see Al, I can toss all the whats, and whys and just know by seeing my brother, all is well.
I will continue to walk towards that light and try to live the life that I feel I should live. I bet if I look real close I will see many of you walking on the same path as me, maybe right beside me.
Don’t Forget
There is never a time
Even when standing in line
That my thoughts don’t drift to you
And a tear may drop too
How could I ever forget those eyes
And all the times that you asked why
How can I ever rest those tears
And my new-found fears
Do you remember me
High above the sea
Do you remember all my words
And the…
Don’t Forget
There is never a time
Even when standing in line
That my thoughts don’t drift to you
And a tear may drop too
How could I ever forget those eyes
And all the times that you asked why
How can I ever rest those tears
And my new-found fears
Do you remember me
High above the sea
Do you remember all my words
And the sound of chirpy birds
Do you remember when I read
The Psalms when you lay in bed
You are forever in my mind
As my days ahead unwind
I love you brother dear
Don’t you ever fear
You are always in my heart
The two of us will never part.
Written by,
Terry Shepherd
04.17.2014
Daily Prompt; The Outsiders
http://dailypost.wordpress.com, DP, Daily Prompt
Tel us about the experience of being outside,…
http://dailypost.wordpress.com, DP, Daily Prompt
Tel us about the experience of being outside, looking in — however you’d like to interpret that.
Photographers, artists, poets: show us OUTSIDE.
I look down at my body and what I see I don’t like. But do I really do anything about it? No, well I can say yes if I am not caring for Al, or the weather is nice. If it is warm, or if the sun is shining, or if I have nothing better to do. If no one is stopping by. If I don’t have any laundry or house to attend to. Depends on how I feel. If I get up in time. If I have no errands to run.
I stand looking down at my body. I glance at Al laying there in his bed. Four steel sets of bars holding him so he doesn’t fall out. A cheap, hard, plastic mattress is what he lies on, while I have a pillow top mattress at the other end of the house.
I look down at my body and I see my worn out slippers and my house coat I am standing in. I should get dressed but geesh, who really cares. Then I glance up at Al and he is clothed in a cloth brief, a cut up the back T-shirt. His toes are shoeless. He has a cotton sheet draped over him. Pillows stuffed under, beside every direction to keep him from getting bedsores.
I look down at my body and I wish I could find the time to take a nice, long, hot bubble bath. Soaking in my favorite scent, splashing hot water down my back. Listening to my favorite music while I watch the glow from the lit candles surrounding me. Then I glance up at Al and I can’t remember the last time he felt water splash over his body. Each day he receives at least one bed bath. We all know there is no better feeling than climbing out of a nice shower or bath.
I look down at my body and I glance up at Al.
A sister I know I am
A stranger I do feel
There is no worse feeling
When you know this is very real
Doing all I can
But never quite enough
His illness makes him weak
But I am growing tough.
It isn’t cool looking outside, in
I can not find one word to say
But I know he is my brother I love
And maybe Jesus will come here today.
Terry Shepherd
01/09/2014
Who I am 