Good Visit

Main dining room

I was a little freaked when I went to visit him today and could not wake him. I realize he started a new medication for depression but it is one that is to take a few weeks to get in the body to work.

The aides were able t finally wake him and he had his shoes put on and helped into his chair. Off we went to the dining room. While  he was awake he was different from yesterday.

Instead of crying and arguing he smiled and said hi to every person he saw. We ordered our lunches and he chatted with me. It was nice to see this change. Are you sure Doctor, that this medication takes a long time to work?

Maybe he was just having a good day. There was a note waiting for me. When I read it, it said, My heart is aching for Al. I have never seen such a bad case of PD in my entire career life.

Wow, this note validated something inside of me. When I hear staff say that Al is just being obnoxious or being rude or mouthy, this brings a little inner peace to me. It is more the PD than it is Al. He can get mad like the rest of us but he is generally not rude and mouthy for no reason.

We ate our lunches and then he fell asleep. I woke him up and took him back to his room. He asked me to stay for a while which I did. I had him stretch out his legs in his recliner. I noticed that his feet were curled up towards his body and his knees would not straighten completely out.

I showed him  how to flex his legs explaining he might help some of his pain by this exercise. As soon as I said this off he went into drift land. I let him sleep a few minutes and then I woke him up and told him I was going to go home so he could rest. He looked up at me and smiled and waved bye.

All in all it was a good visit. I hate seeing him so groggy but I like not hearing oh my legs, oh the pain, it hurts so bad…………

The Dream Job

gorgeous flower 2

Last night I walked a way from my routine of watching King of Kings. I wanted to see what other people were watching. I surfed through the channels and came across a show called Dirty Money.

Now I have always known that money was dirty. I learned that real quick when I was working in the public eye where money was quickly exchanged. My fingers some days look like I had been working in a small flower garden.

I tuned in on it and I was really shocked at what I had been missing out there. There were work opportunities that  had been  passing  me by. The money that could be made was more than in my wildest dreams. Thousands, yes thousands. All I had to do was be myself.

I had to buy some fancy clothes. I may have to take a one-time class updatin  my lady etiquette  manners. Maybe buy some jewelry and oh, the most important thing, go to Weight Watchers to get slim and sexy looking.

For only four hours worth of smiling and maybe a few favors being done, I could earn five thousand dollars. That was the least I could earn. Do you realize I could stay at home keep my passion with my writing and friends? I could work part-time and still have plenty of time for all of you.

As I watched the show I compared myself to some of the business owners and knew that I had a lot of work to do before I could open my own business. I would have to stop my fun and healthy exercises and get my own personal trainer.

I may have to seek out a plastic surgeon and have some bumps and curves added here and there. Oh and by the way, while you are adding Mr. Doctor, can you take out this extra five-pounds around my waist? It really has been bothering me ever since I had kids.

Now I needed to go visit one of those second-hand stores. I was going to have to practice walking the run way with my new four-inch heels. I guess I would look pretty silly falling in front of all of those prestigious clients. So the goal for one day was walk, walk, and hold the chest up and out.

I noticed that a very important piece of evidence included in my resume needed to be my education. Did this mean that my local high school education was not good enough. Well what about my local community college classes, did they count? Was I going to have to send a way to one of those phony internet companies and have some printed framed degrees made up?

I really don’t believe that this work opportunity was a gift from God. Knowing this before  hand, would I be spending all of this quality time with myself only to fail down the road? I know that when I walk the wrong path, I always have to pay the price but, I would have plenty of money to tide me over while getting my dignity and confidence back, right?

Well after watching the one hour entertaining and educational show, I flipped the channel over to the Golden Girls. Although it sounded mysterious, glamorous and exciting, I don’t think being a high-class prostitute is for me after all. Thank you little television for letting me see a tiny dark side of what I have been missing in the world. I guess I will go back to praying and listening for an answer.

Chapter 4

A picture of a door handle.

Laurie and Jane walked to the clinic, and both girls stood outside for a minute. Jane said, ” I don’t know if I really want to do this. What if I find out I am pregnant? What will I do then”? Laurie put her arm around her friend and said  in a matter of fact tone, ” And what if you find out you are not? We won’t know until we go in there. Now come on silly girl, let’s get this over”!

Jane timidly placed her hand on the door handle and both girls walked in. Jane  went to the seats that were in the waiting room and sat. Laurie went to the receptionist window and announced her friend’s name.

Sally, the  receptionist handed her a clipboard with some white pages attached to it, and  said, ” Have your friend fill these out, and then have her bring them back to me”. Laurie took them from her and walked over to where Jane was sitting and handed her the paperwork.

Jane filled out the paper work, while Laurie rambled on in Jane’s ear. After finishing the required forms, Jane slowly walked up to the window, and as she handed her the completed file, the receptionist asked,” Do you have any insurance Jane”? Jane nodded no, and the receptionist noted this on her file, then asked, ” Do you have any cash on you? This visit will cost ten dollars”.

Jane again nodded no, and then Laurie appeared at her side, and whipped out a ten-dollar bill, and said,” Here is the money, now it is paid”. With this being done, the receptionist told them to have a seat, that they would be called next.

The two girls went back to where they had been sitting, and Laurie started talking about what they were going to do once they left here. They could go to the park, or maybe go get something to eat, but the words fell on empty ears, as Jane was in her own world at the moment.

The announcement was made, a young lady was calling Jane’s name. Jane stood up to go and looked back at her friend. She grabbed a hold of her hand, and said, ” Come with me, I don’t want to go in there alone”. With this the two girls went through the door separating them from the waiting room and the doctor.

They only waited a moment, and then Beth, the nurse walked in. She looked at the two girls and asked, “Which one of you is the patient”? Jane replied, ” I am”. With this being decided, the nurse took Jane’s temperature, and listened to her heart. She made some notations on the new file for Jane. She then reached up into the glass cupboard doors, and grabbed a plastic cup. She took it to Jane and said, ” I need you to take this cup and go into the bathroom. When you pull your panties down, you will see some disposable wipes. Wipe yourself from front to back, and then urinate in the cup. Then leave the cup on the back of the stool, and I will come in and get it”.

Jane’s face turned bright red, as she did not usually talk about going to the bathroom. She took the cup from Beth, and walked across the hall, doing what she had been told to do. Soon she walked back in and told the nurse she was finished, and then the nurse disappeared out of the room.

The two girls sat there quietly. They looked the room over, standing up and walking to each picture hanging on the wall, and looking through the glass cupboard doors at all the strange things sitting in there.

Soon the door opened and this time it was not Beth, but instead if was a doctor. He introduced himself as Doctor Bill, and he took the file of Jane’s and sat it on the counter top, reading the results.

He looked at the girls, and asked, ” Which one of you is Jane”? Jane rose her hand half-way, and the doctor asked, ” Do  your parents know that you are here”? Jane shook her head no. The doctor continued, ” You may want to explain to them where you have been, because the test results for pregnancy are positive. You can have your parents call me if they have any questions”.

Jane’s eyes began to water, and Laurie sat dumbfounded. The doctor walked over to where Jane was sitting and shook her hand and wished her good luck in her future. Doctor Bill then opened the door and closed it behind him, leaving the girls to sit there and digest the news.

Beth came back into the room, and sat in the empty chair beside the girls. She handed Jane some pamphlets explaining childbirth. Jane started to look through them, but when she came to the second page, and saw the diagram of a uterus, she closed the pages.

The nurse explained to Jane that she  had options. She said,” Not every woman is always ready for raising  a child. If, after you talk to your parents about this, and you decide you do not want to keep your baby, there is always adoption”. Beth handed her another handbook, that explained the process of adoption, and then asked Jane if she had any questions, and Jane nodded no.

With the conversation being ended, Beth led the two girls back out through the door, and said,” If you need someone to talk to or have any questions, just come back and see me Jane. I know this is going to be a tough decision for you, and there will be many changes in your life”.

Jane gave a small smile, and turned and walked through the exit door. The two girls went immediately to the soda fountain. They found a booth towards the back of the restaurant. The lights were dim,  and no one sat this close to the door that led to the kitchen. The girls could talk here in private.

Sweating like Rain Showers

Rain Showers over the . Taken in

My brother got up a little later than usual this morning, but nothing to be concerned over. He came out for breakfast, and I was already drinking my cup of coffee and on the computer. His movements are slow, but he gets his breakfast in the microwave and then proceeds to eat.

As he is eating, he asked  me something he has never done  before. He asked  me to give him a shower. I said, what?, and he repeats himself. A little radar went off in my head, as this was just something he would not ask of me, even if he was the dirtiest man on earth. He has never enjoyed his sister giving him a shower, seeing him in the buff, and I don’t blame him at all. This is why we have a shower person.

I walked over to him, and when I was facing his back, I could almost see myself in his glare. His sweat was pouring off of him, like he was standing out under rain showers.

I asked him if he was feeling alright, and the only complaint he had was that his legs hurt, and this is so common, I really don’t give it second thoughts anymore. His head was soaked, his back. He was cold and clammy, so cold it felt like cement.

After he finished eating, I gave him  his shower. I added baby powder with baking soda to his upper half of his body, and dressed him only in clean undies and shorts. He wanted to put the same shorts on he had worn last evening, because in his words, they were not dirty. I said no, we need clean ones, as the sweat made them dirty. He argued briefly, and I said, I am not budging, so he hushed.

As soon as I brushed his hair and got his toothbrush topped off with toothpaste, I noticed his back was once again in the shower mode. Five minutes after his shower, he was as before.

I left him to brush his teeth, and came out and called the doctor. I told the  nurse his symptoms were almost zero, but the sweat was like rain showers. She let out a lot of questions, and some were negative answers and a few were positive. She said that she was going to  speak to the doctor and would call back soon.

When I get nervous, I clean, and I was a little nervous, because of a thing I call, been too good too  long. We have went months with no hospital stays or big anger issues that required other doctors, so I had without planning, been thinking about it lately. I know it is a bad thing to do, but I do it. It is like us thinking of how good our own car is running, then it breaks down.

So, from the time I hung up from the nurse, I also took a shower, changed my bed sheets, and have started a load of laundry. I cleaned Al’s bathroom, and soaked his brush and combs in boiling water. Now I am sitting here pouring out my itty bitty concerns to you, while waiting for the phone to ring.