Tag Archives: Fathers

Daily Prompt; My Precious

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Who is the person in your life who can do no wrong? Describe this person and tell us why you hold them in such high esteem.

Photographers, artists, poets: show us PRECIOUS.

Who is the person in my life that can do no wrong? I am sorry, I can’t think of anyone who can do no wrong except one lady. I used to think there were two. My best friend, L.S. and my dad.

Now being down to one I feel so lucky that I have that very best friend who I think the highest regards for. Who in my eyes does no wrong.

Now when I was a kid, not too many years back I had a few favorite people I felt could do no wrong. Idols, who I looked up to. Visits I got so excited about. Smiles so big that they showed missing teeth. Yes, those were the days. Can you guess who they were in a young girl’s life? Let me show you by photo only. I know you will guess then.

tooth fairyeaster bunnysanta clause

Daily Prompt; Name that..You

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Do you know the meaning of your name, and why your parents chose it? Do you think it suits you? What about your children’s names?

Photographers, artists, poets: show us IDENTITY.

My name is not a bad combination. Teresa Jane.  The name Teresa means in Spanish,” saint”. Or in English it means ” harvester.”saintharvester

But in my eyes it means nothing really. As I was called by my nick name since a very young girl, Terry.

When I hear my proper name being used, I think back to when I was in trouble with my Mom. Teresa Jane please come here.

That meant trouble. What did I do wrong this time?mother mad Today if I hear my proper name it has to be voiced from a stranger. Someone on the other end of the phone line, verifying who I am. Just like in the military. Name, serial number, age.drill-sergeant

My middle name is something I now am not so proud of. I used to be.

I  used to think I was special because I was named after a friend of my real mother.

But after making repeated visits to get to know this real woman, given the undeserved title of mother, I am no longer proud.

When I hear the word Jane today, I don’t even acknowledge. They must be talking to someone else. It must be a stranger calling out to me.danger

When I used to hear my Dad calling my name I went running.

For years he was my idol, my hero, my everything.hero

Once I started caring for my brother I saw the word hero being slowly erased from the blackboard.

Now the word love remains and the good memories that I shared with him while growing up.blackboard_math

So all in all my name is my own.

Created and formed from many angles.

Today, I prefer to be called Mom, friend, Aunt, or just me, Terry.dad and me

Below is a photo of me and my Dad.

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If I Didn’t Care

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I was writing on my quotes WP page and also put some new music on my music page here on WP. I decided to spend some free time going through the U-tube videos. I came across a group that my Mom loved. They were called the Ink Spots. Some of you older ones…

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If I Didn’t Care

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I was writing on my quotes WP page and also put some new music on my music page here on WP. I decided to spend some free time going through the U-tube videos. I came across a group that my Mom loved. They were called the Ink Spots. Some of you older ones may remember this group.

I can remember cleaning the house before my parents got home from work. I would go to that long box on feet and turn the record player on. I would pull out Mom’s 331/3 album and place it gently on the turn table. Placing the needle gently down on the record so as not to scratch it, I would turn it up to the point of almost blowing the speakers.

I would grab the sweeper hose and stand in the middle of the living room on top of the footstool and pretend I was singing into a microphone to the words of this song.

When I looked at this song I got the biggest stab in the heart I have had in some time. It is different from the ones I feel with Al. This stab was a memory stab. Going back in time when life was free and spinning in circles going  nowhere, but yet giggling like there is no worries in this world.

Oh Mom and Dad, how I miss you. It doesn’t matter Mom if you have been gone almost 13 years or Dad if you have been gone for almost six, I feel you  today deep in my gut. The love I carry will never vanish.

I replayed this song twice and then it cut me deep. Our entire family was based on who cares about who and why don’t I feel it.

The words say If I didn’t care.

Was Mom trying to tell me something and I never got it until all these years later? Or was this a song meant for her and my Dad? I know they had a rough start in their marriage. Who wouldn’t when all of a sudden two youngsters were dropped in your lap.

 

MOM

Mom  I will never forget

What you tried to do

Doing the best you could

Coming into this new.

I didn’t give much of a chance

I could have  behaved better

But I am so glad today

That I sat and wrote you that letter.

I am not sure;  but am hoping so

That although you are not here

That you know my heart was true

More than life’s deepest fear.

I hope when my time comes

And I am standing next to you

That you will wrap your arms around me

I will say I care and I love you through and through.

Written by,

Terry Shepherd

07/27/2013

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Daily Prompt; Unpopular/ The Daily Post

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Tell us about a time when you had to choose between two options, and you picked

How the Grinch Stole Christmas! (TV special)

the unpopular choice.

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When my mother passed a way and the dust settled, dad became very lonely. He went to have coffee and met a couple of ladies. It perked him up some but then a lady he was introduced to made him smile.

She seemed very nice. Pretty and bubbly was a nice way to describe her. What I did notice was how dad’s eyes lit up and  this was such a nicer thing to see than the gloom face. My dad never liked being alone, and so it wasn’t difficult for them to date and become closer and eventually he moved into her house.

For almost a year the two seemed very happy until one day the sky fell around him and me. He got the news that he had Leukemia. It had advanced enough that they even gave him his approximate ending date.

The lady that he was living with changed from beautiful and bubbly to Scarface and Mr. Grinch. Everyone grieves losses in their own way and this woman was grieving the past and the future.

What once came out of her mouth as fables, now came  out as daggers. I took care of my dad while he was sick and he remained living at her house. As he became worse, she would say terrible things about him behind his back, and soon started attacking me with her words also.

The reason for this was because she had not completely healed from her own loss of losing her husband and now the man she was attracted to was going to die also. To protect herself from more pain, she became the devil in disguise.

It got so bad that I didn’t want to go there. Every time I tried to make things better, she dug me in a deeper hole. I knew that my dad had caught on to what she was doing as her hidden words had made their way out of the closet.

I asked my dad if he wouldn’t rather go home. I told him I could take care of him at home just as well as I could at her house, but he said no. The presence of her being around 24/7 made him feel better. He explained to me to just bite my tongue, as he didn’t want to die alone.

He would rather have someone than no one. This broke me up so much. I hated going there. I tried to ignore her foul mouth and just take care of dad. Although I understood the mechanics of what made her the way she was, it didn’t mean dad and I liked it.

He died in her house. He was laying in a bed and I was laying beside him holding his hand. He looked at me one last time and told me,”I love you.” I am glad I stuck it out, but I wish for his and my sake his fear of loneliness would have been only surface deep.

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Needs Or Wants

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Cover of "Kindle Wireless Reading Device,...

Cover via Amazon

I am doing laundry and considering washing a couple of windows, inside and out. While I am debating on what to do next, I have been watching the commercials on the television. I realize that you can buy anything your heart desires for the right price. Do you need a new figure? You can buy a Weight Watchers diet plan. You can buy the special foods with the points numbered on them, and you can even pay to go weigh in public with others. Do you not like your face, your eyes, nose or chin? You can pay for an alteration, even splurging for a look where people would not recognize you immediately. Do you have those ugly spider veins? You can pay someone to take the streaks away, leaving you with beautiful legs. Are you and your partner not compatible in the bedroom? You can buy another human body for an hour to give you what you think you lack at home. Do the shoe commercials tell you that your feet would look more beautiful if you wore their brand of shoes? How many pairs of shoes are already in your closet, also guaranteed to make you more beautiful than you already are in God’s eyes. Did God not give you the perfect breast size? You can purchase new ones if you want. How about the body that God hath made? It is remarkable that you can now pay top dollars and have your gender changed. Can a commercial convince you that your car that is running fine, and only five years old, that you must have a faster, safer, more exotic car  to be able to fit in to this world? That you will get more dates, more looks, and more envious eyes turning your way? Don’t like carrying around your favorite paper back book? You can buy a Kindle and take this with you everywhere. You can purchase a certificate for anything you want to be today. I can remember when training was offered for free at a job, along with a weekly pay check. Remember, going into your grandma’s garden and picking that warm, plump  tomato off of the vine? Enjoying the flavor of it as you bite into it and the juices run down your arm? The watermelon? Dad would go to the garden patch and pick out one of many, cut if from the vine, and you had it for supper that night? Now you can pay a high price for organic, the same food you ate from the garden in earlier days. Now you can pay high prices, thanking the production companies, by filling their pockets, for not putting that cancer chemical in your foods. My father mowed our yard with a hand push mower, that had blades and a frame and handle. Now you can purchase gas, electric, self-propelled mowers, that almost do the guiding and work for you. Just know your budget and they can fulfill your dream. You can pay money to go to a club and walk an indoor track, or use an indoor, heated pool. When I was young, I walked as a way to get from point A to point B. I swam in the lakes, in the summer, where the natural sun heated the water, and I could go as many times as I wished all summer long for free. You can now purchase under garments that add lift to your bottom, or extra lift to your breast. Have a tummy that pokes out? You can buy an all in one, to keep it all hidden and under control. I could always listen to the radio at home on my very own portable radio, or I could choose to go out into the living room and watch the family television, all three channels. Now you can purchase many stations, premiums for kids, teens, and adults, any sports channel you can imagine, and you can watch these on any numerous televisions through out your house. You can purchase tiny electronics, that you can place ear buds in your ears, purchase and download the music, and have your very own juke box with you at all times. Need to take your computer with you? You can buy a laptop, and all the accessories, now making the internet available to you 24 hours a day.  When mom or dad called your name and you were so excited because someone was calling for you, now you can carry a cell phone, and pay top dollar in order to never miss a call. You can even purchase electronics that allow you to see the other person you are talking to. My parents each had two jobs in their lives. The one they started in their teen years, and the one they ended up retiring from. Now you can choose any job, switch at any time because there are no longer the securities built-in to the paycheck that give you the incentive to remain with one company. You can even buy your own retirement, and this is probably a good purchase, because if you don’t, you may retire in the poor house. Remember the wonderful health insurance you had when you worked full-time? Now you can purchase your own coverage, picking and choosing what you think you may need. This used to be  free, remember? Our world is in debt to a dollar amount that we can barely speak. Jobs are hard to find, if you are looking for security. God has promised to  give us all that we need in our lives, if we promise to love and follow him. How much do we pay yearly, to hear that we need more to be more. Is there a difference between wants and needs? Should we pay a higher price to keep the cancer chemicals out of our bodies, because the supply and demand is so huge with the fact that we want it all now? I am not saying that advancements in life are bad. We do need some in order to keep up with the future, but do you think the media, the television, magazine ads, books are promoting our minds to spend more on wants than needs. The clever pictures, words, and sexual innuendos that are used to sell us, are done so craftily, that we do not even realize what is happening. I find myself in these positions at times also. I am guilty for sure. When I see this happening, when I hear I want, I want, coming out of my mouth, I have to stop, and take a breath, and think, do I need this or do I want this. Just my opinions friends. No pointing  any fingers from me. We each live our own lives the way we see fit. Remember the phrase, stop and smell the roses? This is what I need to work on daily, because I can find my mind swirling and making me dizzy.

The Great Mushroom Trips

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slightly improved version of mushroom morpholo...

slightly improved version of mushroom morphology chart. Created by me user debivort, January 2006 (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Now that spring is officially here, it takes me back in time of days where my dad should have hated me, but he didn’t. Every spring he and his friend would take me mushroom hunting. My dad could spot them from far away. We never left empty-handed, thanks to him. They would go their way, and I would venture off a ways from them. We all carried empty orange netted bags. Every once in a while, I would hear my dad yell, are you doing ok? Are you finding any? I would always yell back, I am fine. I am doing ok. In the silence of the woods, I could hear him yell at his friend, telling him to come look what he had found. I could hear the laughter coming from the two of them. Mean while I was becoming annoyed with myself and more determined with each step, that I was going to find a mushroom, but in time  I would find that from bending my neck down for so long, I would become distracted  from finding mushrooms, as I kept catching myself stopping and rubbing my neck. I would find my mind wandering to where Mom was and what was she doing. I bet she was shopping and eating lunch with her friends. I would start to daydream about school, friends, and cute boys. I don’t know how long we were in the woods, but it seemed like we walked for hours. We probably were not out there longer than two. Dad would catch up with me and notice that I didn’t have any in my bag. He sat me down on a log and pointed out to me where the sun was, point to certain plants with umbrellas on them, showed me moss on the trees, and explain how the moss was a big signal for me. After we both rested, we would part ways, and back to hunting we would go. I didn’t want my Dad to think I couldn’t find mushroom, so I was more determined at that moment, to crawl on the ground, if it meant finding just one. Silence was heavy around me. No one must be finding them now, as I heard no laughter or chatter. About an hour later Dad and his friend came to where I was looking. They both stood their, looking at each other, with hands on their hips. My Dad’s friend was laughing so hard I wondered if he was going to pee his pants. He was doubled over from laughing so loud. They had both caught me crawling on hands and knees, bag  tucked in my jeans, head bent as if praying. My Dad didn’t laugh though. He just stood there for a moment, maybe considering how to tell me in a fatherly way, that I was crawling on the mushrooms . They were right there underneath my knee. Obviously, I never was asked to go again. The only thing I can say in defense about those mushroom trips is, that later in life, I learned I was color blind.