I am watching Dr. PHIL, a very interesting topic. People who are strong believers in God, who think they can raise the dead animals or people.
I do believe that God can make many miracles and do amazing actions through human life, but I feel God performed many miracles to show us he is the almighty God. I don’t believe that we can do all things.
What are your thoughts ?
#FWF Free Write Friday; Ponder This
Todayyou have been granted the opportunity to go anywhere, do anything,…
Today you have been granted the opportunity to go anywhere, do anything, meet anyone, travel in time…whatever you wish, it is yours. Now, there’s a catch. (Isn’t there always?) When you wake up tomorrow… you will not remember any of it.
I left my cares behind. On my back was a backpack filled with necessities. In my pockets were monies I had stashed a way for a rainy day. Dressed in jeans for hiking and good boots, my black-felted cowgirl hat, and a cotton blouse I was going nowhere.
Al was in the care at the Hospice house and Rhino was being fed by the neighbor. I had two weeks that Al could be safely out of my sight and I decided I was going to take advantage of every moment I could.
The skies were endless and my dreams rode the horizons. Fresh air filling my nostrils, the blue in my eyes straining to see all life had in front of me. My lungs filling with new life. I was free, yes totally free.
I had only walked about a mile when a Fairy Princess I had once dreamed about as a child appeared. She waved her beautiful, sparkling wand and presented me with a fine blue feather. She nodded towards it smiling and with her eyes told me to sit upon the carrier named Blue.
Not questioning anything I did as she prompted. The delicacy was strong enough to hold me and all that I carried. When I looked back to thank her she was gone. I smiled and within seconds my new seat lifted me above the tallest green trees. I was floating over my home I had just left.
I did not need a guide because the yearnings I carried in my heart were transferred into my golden carriage. We drifted slowly higher and I saw my parents home. Tears started to fall and as if magic the feather handed me a blue handkerchief. The edges were laced in pale blue. The core of it in the color of virgin white.
I wiped my tears and we darted higher and as we traveled it seemed like only minutes but I knew it had been much longer. For the next city I saw was one that I had lived in many years ago in Germany. Oh what beauty. Blue took me over the house that I had once lived in as a newlywed. Beautiful smiles crossed my face as I remembered all the special moments we had shared.
I photographed every detail perfectly in my mind as we hovered over the city. It was exhilarating. No one could interrupt me. I was free to react in any way that felt good. No judging, no tears, pure splendor is what I felt at this moment. My heart was higher than the tallest mountains.
We left there and soon I found myself in the front yard of my daughter’s home. I started crying and no handkerchief could control these happy and joyful tears. I miss my daughter very much. She doesn’t live near me any longer but my mind thinks of her often. Oh how I miss her, and now here I am.
Blue lowered me to the ground and I could see my daughter peering through the front window. She saw me walking up to her front door and she ran out to greet me. We hugged each other like we had never hugged. She roughed up my hair and I tousled hers. Arm in arm we walked into her home. Neither of us shut up for one second. We talked until I was signaled it was time to move on. We cried for the parting of each other but promised to not wait so long to see each other the next time.
I sat back on my familiar Blue and off we went into the skies once again. We went higher and higher. I wasn’t afraid but I was questioning in my mind where we were going. At long last I was placed in front of two golden doors. I wasn’t allowed in and this time Blue didn’t disappear.
There was a fine mist that made me keep blinking but when my eyes adjusted there on the outside of the golden gates stood my entire family. Oh Mom, oh Dad, how I have missed you. Running into their arms. Once again feeling the sureness that I was so familiar with. Seeing my Dad’s smile and Mom’s beautiful face almost made me faint.
But I dare not or I would miss each precious moment. Behind my parents were other family members. Aunts, Uncles, cousins. Everyone was there and for a brief moment I remembered love. Love for people, family and a safe haven where I knew I belonged.
Blue motioned for me that it was time to go. I clung to my parents not wanting to ever let go, but I had to. This was not for me to decide. This was my inner self expressing needs and desires that had been hidden too deeply to surface for so long.
Mom and Dad waved goodbye to me. Their eyes smiled at me and I could make out their lips saying they would see me soon.
I felt like I was ten years old again. Life was all anew. There was no sickness around me. There was no divorce nor pain. I was swinging high in a school yard swing. Kicking my feet back and forth begging to go higher. I never wanted this to stop.
Blue took me to the house I lived in when I was a child. He took me over the playground I used to play in as a child. I could see my life flowing before me. Month after month, year after year I revisited.
I wasn’t ready for the ride to stop but as I neared the familiar sights of my own home I was able to see my two sons. They were waving at me. They were mouthing words of You Go Girl. All my grandchildren were standing with them. They were screaming, hi Grandma.
They were jumping up and down as they tried so desperately to reach up to me and grab my hand. If I could have I would have reached down and picked each one up and take them with me, but alas this ride was for no one other than my inner being.
Soon I was brought down to solid ground. I was dropped off in the exact same spot as I was lifted from. I looked around to see if my fairy Princess was here but there was no one. It was just me standing in my own shadow, remembering all I had just experienced.
I had the time of my life. Everything I had ever dreamed about I had experienced. My mind was full of contentment and sweet memories. Blue had vanished and I turned towards my house and walked home. As I entered the front door I noticed nothing had changed. Everything was just how I had left it.
Nothing had changed on the outside but my entire spirit had done a 360 turn around. As I drifted off to sleep silhouettes of Mom and Dad’s smiles in their eyes reflected back at me.
Daily Prompt ; Earworm
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What song is stuck in your head (or…
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What song is stuck in your head (or on permanent rotation in your CD or MP3 player) these days? Why does it speak to you?
I have watched this telethon for so many years, The Jerry Lewis Telethon. I am listening to it right now and the tears are already flowing and the hairs are standing on my arms.
My heart bleeds for the less fortunate just as much for those that I do not know, and for Al, my brother.
I tell people I am such a big mushy person when it comes to people who are hurting or suffering.
If the good Lord takes my brother from me before I go, this will be playing at his funeral.
Al, my dear brother, the words I Love You can only talk about how I feel through the surface, but it is all I know how to say. When I saw this in September of 2012 Al, I said an extra long prayer for you.
You’ll Never Walk Alone,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,as long as I am breathing dear brother
Allie stared through the window. Tears running down her cheeks as she looked at the baby. She placed her finger to the glass and outlined his bassinet and his body wrapped in the blue blanket.
I want to keep him. I love him so much already. Why can’t I keep him. This is the only chance I will ever get of having someone of my own to love.
Allie had been involved with actions that were against her will, but as the weeks and months went by she felt movement which caused yearnings in her heart. She walked a way from the glass and went back to her room.
She threw herself down on her bed and sobbed. The nurse walked in and asked,”Are you alright honey? Is there anything physically wrong with you? Oh, I know this just to be one of the hardest things you will ever go through in your life”.
Allie sat up and buried her head in the nurses bosom. She cried like a baby for the loss of life she would never touch. The nurse let her cry until she had quieted and then handed her some tissue to wipe her eyes and her nose.
“I know it is so painful now Allie, but God will heal your heart”. The nurse reached into her pocket and pulled out a pocket-size Bible and opened Allie’s hand and placed it.” This is something I wish for you to have. It is a gift from me. I once depended on this for my own survival in life and now I want you to have it”.
Allie held it and the nurse got up off of the bed and told her, “I have to get back to work honey. If there is anything I can do for you before you leave, don’t hesitate to find me or just put on your call light”. Allie gave her a weak smile and said, “thank-you”.
Allie proceeded to get all of her belongings she had come in with around. She got dressed and sat back down on the bed waiting for her mother to come pick her up. She picked up the small gift that the nurse had given her and flipped through the pages.
She didn’t recognize anything as she had not been brought up in any type of church. She vowed to herself to read it though. If it helped the nurse, it could help her. She walked down to the nursery one more time and gazed through the window at the little boy.
Good-bye little one. I hope that you will understand the truth one day. It wasn’t that I didn’t want you, always believe this. As she walked back towards her room, she saw her mother coming towards her.
Her mother was in a hurry and without much more than a greeting she went straight for Allie’s room and started gathering up the suitcase. “Is there anything else we need to do? Did you double-check to make sure you didn’t leave anything behind? I have to get back to work, and I don’t have time to be coming back here again”.
Allie told her that she had looked everywhere twice and that she was ready to go. Without anymore talk, the two left and went through the front doors out into the cloudy day. It was drizzling outside. It reminded Allie of her own heart. Dismal and dreary.
Her mother tossed her suitcase in the trunk and she and Allie left. Once home and the car emptied her mom left her in silence as she went back to work. Allie sat on the couch, and then laid down and drifted off to sleep.
When she woke up she went to the kitchen and made herself a sandwich. Then she took her suitcase to her bedroom and began to unpack it. All she could think of was,take this pain a way. I want to forget. I don’t want to hurt anymore.
Afterwards she found the little Bible in her purse and she pulled it out. She found the verse that said,for God so loved the world that he gave his only begotten son. That who so ever believeth shall have ever lasting life.
She went back to the beginning and started reading word by word. Some of it she didn’t understand but there were other verses that spoke to her. She heard a car door letting her know that mom was home.
She left her bedroom and headed to the kitchen. Her mom walked through the door looking exhausted. “Did you have a rough afternoon mom?”
” I sure did Allie. They made me bust my rear doing double time for the time I took off to come get you. What have you started for supper? I don’t smell anything cooking”.
“Sorry mom, I was tired too and laid down and took a nap.Then I unpacked my suitcase. I was just getting ready to see what I could fix for us”.
“Well get busy. I’m hungry. I had to work through my lunch time”. With that her mom walked out of the kitchen leaving a worn girl to figure out their meal. Allie ended up making some pancakes along with some scrambled eggs.
She yelled out to her mom that her supper was on the table and she took her own to her room. She wasn’t ready to listen to her mom carry on about her and her day. What about my own day? What about what I just went through? I feel empty inside, alone and my body still hurts.
After supper was over and the kitchen tidied up, her mom went to her bedroom and Allie remained in her own room. It didn’t take her long to finish reading the miniature version of the King James Bible. She went back to areas that had interested her and jotted them down in her diary, so she wouldn’t forget.
With Jesus being the last thing on her mind she fell asleep. Cuddled in her blankets she began to dream. She dreamed of the baby boy she had said good-bye to earlier. She saw her own self crying for his loss. She heard herself crying out for help and then she saw something she had never seen before.
In her dream a tall, gentle man came to her bedside. He had both arms opened to her and said, fear not my child, I am here to help you. Follow me and I will give you peace forever. The smile on his face was comforting and she could feel a sense of peace around her body.
Without thinking she felt her soul
Baby Boy!!! (Photo credit: Shrini Photography)
being lifted out of the bed and she went to him. He took her hand and guided her into the light. It was brighter than the sun. Warm, so peacefully warm. It reminded her of taking a nice bubble bath.
She saw some golden gates that were made out of iron. The man walked her through them and when they were getting closer to the almighty throne he leaned in and whispered to her, I have better and bigger plans for you Allie. You have suffered enough on earth. I have plenty of babies here in my kingdom that need so much love. This is the job I want you to do. Never look back on all of the yesterdays. I will bring you comfort and joy for eternity.
With this being said, she smiled up at him and let him lead the way.
You’re having a nightmare, and have to choose between three doors. Pick one,
and tell us about what you find on the other side.
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I will pick door number two, because in my mind it is in the middle. It can’t be too bad or too good to be true.
What I found on the other side was magnificent. Beautiful trees with shimmery golden leaves. A blue sky that went on forever and ever; not even a puff of a cloud in my view.The sun was brighter than anything I have ever seen. It sparkled more than the biggest diamond.
A long brick path leading down a long narrow lane. It split off at the end and once again I was able to choose which of the three paths I would take. The bricks were as new, never having had a footprint on it. Not a sliver or blade of grass grew in between the cracks.
I walked the path, feeling like I should walk in bare feet to not leave specks of dirt to follow me. I could smell the dirt around me. It smelled so fresh, like it had just been placed. It was so dark like a strong cup of coffee. It smelled like it had been freshly watered.
Rustling of leaves made music to walk to. Branches bending down welcoming me on my trip. Birds of many colors flew near and above me. Whispering sweet words of hellos and welcomes.
I reached the end of the road and I chose door number one. A new beginning, a promise of hope, new sights. Number one always represents the first. The first of everything to come my way.
As I entered the big golden oak door, my eyes popped, and tears raced down my face. I had made the right choice. A sight awaited for me, hands reaching out to welcome me, gathering around me, heart to hearts were being shared.
Every void that I have suffered the past 12 years were replaced and made whole. As each soul touched me another hole was filled. When I looked down at myself, it was as if I was brand new and had never been branded with pain.
I saw my dear Mother, who was the first to come greet me. As I looked into her green eyes, glittery tears reflected into my heart. She loved me, she had always loved me. All the guilt I had carried all my life about the way I had treated her had vanished.
Behind her, coming out of the shadow was my daddy. I fell on bended knees and wept like a new-born baby. My daddy, the hero of my life. I stood up and raced into his open arms and gave him the biggest bear hug I could muster. I heard him whisper in my ear,” I am sorry my daughter. I should have been more open. I should have told you that I loved you. I was shy and didn’t know how to reach out”.
“Oh daddy, I always knew you loved me. You may not have said it, but I always felt it”. We hugged and the clock quit ticking as the two of us healed. We drew apart and the three of us formed a small circle. We took each others hands and held tight. We would never disappear from one another again.
In the background, I saw familiar faces. I smiled and was greeted with loving faces of my grandparents, aunts and uncles. I turned towards the door and I saw it being nudged to open, but it would not. I let go of my parents hands and gently walked up to the big oak door, trying to peek into the peep-hole.
I wept once again as I saw my dear brother standing on the other side. He was calling my name. He was kicking and crying and knocking on the door. I could hear him telling me, ” Please let me in sis. Don’t leave me out here all alone”.
I said to him,” I hear you Al, I hear you calling my name. I love you brother with all of my heart. I am here with mom and dad and grandma and grandpa. They are waving hello to you brother”. The noise stopped as he leaned his ear close to the wood and strained to hear every word I said. He said, ” Please let me in. I am afraid. I don’t want to be here without you”. With this I replied, ” I can not do as you wish for this one time. God is whispering in my ear, that it is not your time. Go back dear brother. Be brave, hold your chin up high. You will be alright. I am watching over you. The good news is you just have to wait a little while longer, and then we shall all be together, a family again”. As I looked through the peep-hole, I saw him lower his head and walk slowly a way. My heart ached as I always wanted to give him what he wished for. I said to myself, it won’t be long baby brother, it won’t be long.
Standing in the shadows of life looking out
At the glistening snow that is falling all about
Feeling a hush covering my mind and soul
The candle is burning, but the flame is low
And now the time has come upon me
To realize that life can set some free
And others will carry a mound of pain
And although it hurts bad, there is nothing to gain
The night brings no light and it is hard to see
The pain that is deeply touching inside of me
Sometimes we are faced and not given a chance
Decisions and answers that become enhanced
Are taken away by the one above
He promises to care and to always love
I don’t understand all of his ways for me
All I know at this moment, is that it is tearing at me
So many prayers have been prayed tonight
These will help me to get through this night
We are born to live and we live to die
We are given trials and ask him why
This is one of the hardest things I will do
Is realizing sometime I am going to lose you
I have kept you under my arms with care
I have carried your burdens so you don’t have to bare
Now I am going to share our lives with them
In hope that we can make you feel better again
Everyone will do their best to make you feel
As best you can, I swear it for real
How ever much time you have left right here
Always remember, brother I love you so dear.
Terry Shepherd
Nov 8th 2012
Who I am 