Venting


A blog is a place to ask for support, tell wonderful news and share photographs. It is also a firm ground to vent, and today this is what I am going to do for my first post.

 

The house is very quiet right now but my head is doing its fair share of stirring up a small funnel cloud. Al did go to Day Program today. He started waking up at 4am wanting to get up. Each time I had to tell him it is not time.

 

He watched TV and I laid in bed under the warm covers listening to the baby monitor and trying to close just one eye. I was still tired. At 9am, the shower gal had still not called. I went in to check on Al and he was crying.

 

Fear of no shower and evidently stressing over not getting to go to D.P. was bothering him. I used the phone and called the office. A message was waiting for me. It seems that although the shower gal called, our phone never rang. She was on her way though.

 

I explained to Al that she was coming but by then he was too much into the stress part and he wasn’t truly listening to me. It seems that this shower gal is coming later and later. She gives Al a very quick shower and he is still damp when he gets on the bus.

 

We all know what this can do to a healthy person, let alone an ill patient, especially as it gets colder outside. She finally arrived and was surprised that Al was getting a shower instead of a bed bath.

 

I explained to her that she should just always assume he will get a shower and when she calls to let us know she is on her way, I can tell her then if he is not going to D.P. She was cool with that.

 

She took Al to the bathroom. Now in the bathroom there is everything ready for her. I have already shaved Al and brushed his teeth. Towels, wash cloths, and his gait belt is all waiting and ready.

 

I came out to my computer and turned it on. I don’t remember what I was thinking I wanted to tell her but I popped my head in the bathroom to say something and my mouth dropped immediately.

 

Al was taking his three steps, and actually doing rather well considering the past four days, but, she was not holding on to him at all. I immediately with probably a stressed voice told her to hang on to him.

 

She said ok. I told her, ” I don’t ever want you to have Al in any standing position without hanging on to him. He could fall so quickly but if you are holding on to him at least you can let him slide down your leg and he would have less than a hard fall.” I had always learned this in my own 23 years of experience and training.

 

She just looked at me and said, ” I hear what you are saying, but he is a big guy. I will never hold on to him so tight that if he falls he will hurt me.”

 

I think I was speechless and then the sister part of me kicked in and I asked, ” Do you know anything about M.S.A.”? She rattled off the long name for it and explained she doesn’t get involved with the diagnosis, she just gives showers.

 

I took a deep breath so I could speak in a nice manner and I explained about the wires in his brain not working. I told her that although he is standing alone at this moment, the very next second he can buckle and go down. I also told her that I never wanted to see her not hanging on to him again and to use the gait belt for better control.

 

She came back with she wasn’t hurting her back over him. I left the bathroom fuming and confused. Under normal conditions I would have reported her butt to the office, but on the other hand, the staff seems to have a hard time getting employees to come up this far, so I feel trapped in some ways.

 

I want Al to have his shower, and yet I didn’t like her comment. I didn’t like that she wasn’t trained on M.S.A. and knew nothing about it. Maybe I am just too protective but Al has fallen even in my care and the bathroom is tiled, not carpet. Well, crap, I just don’t want him to fall period, and for her to say she was more concerned about her than him, just made me swallow wrong.

 

I am going to the grocery store and stocking up because now I never know if he will go to D.P. the next normal scheduled time or not. I want to enjoy my time out today. I haven’t left the house since last Thursday, so I had to write about my thoughts so I can at least enjoy the trip to the grocery store. Now that sounded pretty bad didn’t it. Terry is going to get all excited about grocery shopping. LOL

English: A funnel cloud just east of Salina, K...

Strangers In The Night


 

Strangers

 

We met as strangers

I was sitting at the bar

He walked in and tipped his hat

We left together

He made love to me all night long

In the morning I awoke and he was gone

Was I dreaming, I rubbed my eyes

Or was this a stranger in the night.

Written by,

Terry Shepherd

10/29/2013

Never give up your gifts so easily, choose wisely” T. Shepherd

strangers

Women Are Unique


Here is another story that ripped at my heart because I saw so many words in my own life.

I found this on my Face Book. I can not take any credit for this, I can only share.

“WHY WOMAN CRY”

A little boy asked his mother, “Why are you crying?” “Because I’m a woman,” she told him.

“I don’t understand,” he said. His Mom just hugged him and said, “And you never will.”

Later the little boy asked his father, “Why does mother seem to cry for no reason?”

“All women cry for no reason,” was all his dad could say.

The little boy grew up and became a man, still wondering why women cry.

Finally he put in a call to God. When God got on the phone, he asked,

“God, why do women cry so easily?”

God said, “When I made the woman she had to be special.

I made her shoulders strong enough to carry the weight of the world, yet gentle enough to give comfort.

I gave her an inner strength to endure childbirth and the rejection that many times comes from her children.

I gave her a hardness that allows her to keep going when everyone else gives up, and take care of her family through sickness and fatigue without complaining.

I gave her the sensitivity to love her children under any and all circumstances, even when her child has hurt her very badly.

I gave her strength to carry her husband through his faults and fashioned her from his rib to protect his heart.

I gave her wisdom to know that a good husband never hurts his wife, but sometimes tests her strengths and her resolve to stand beside him And finally, I gave her a tear to shed. This is hers exclusively to use whenever it is needed.”

“You see my son,” said God, “the beauty of a woman is not in the clothes she wears, the figure that she carries, or the way she combs her hair.

The beauty of a woman must be seen in her eyes, because that is the doorway to her heart the place where love resides.”

eye crying

I Am Learning


Life is  fragile

I am learning

To be aware

Even more

Of what I

Can lose

By one look

One word

All that I

Thought can

Disappear

Into the black skies

I am learning

To appreciate

Even more

Than what I

Did before

The gifts of

Friendshipsea of waterclass reunion

The life I live

For I know

That in a

Blink of an eye

It can all

Be taken away.

Written by,

Terry Shepherd

 

Rice In His Hair?


Rice and veg served with mixed pickles

It’s been a busy day. Getting Al up and fed. Next washed up and dressed. Teeth brushed, bed changed. Then it was time to take him down the ramp to catch the bus. Now this is when I have decided to take my own medications and eat breakfast. Through the week this works out pretty good. Nine a.m. is not a bad time for me. On the weekends I am a little off considering we both sneak in some extra sleep.

I then do the morning dishes, and laundry if need be. I clean what needs to be clean. Then I get online for my free time. Today at 1:30 I had another appointment with the business that I am working for taking care of Al.

I knew this appointment would go on forever and I was right. She and I do so much chatting it takes forever to get through all the paper work. She left at 4:45, just 15 minutes before Al pulled up in his bus.

She and I apologized to each other for being such talk-aholics  when she left, but we were both laughing realizing that we had a great time.

I didn’t get my nap today so I am a little extra tired tonight. I don’t think I need a nap only because of Al, I think I am just getting older.

Al pulled up and I went and got him off the bus and took him back up the ramp. We ate left-overs tonight as I really didn’t have time to cook a real meal. Tomorrow for supper we are having spaghetti. I will cut his up pretty well and hope for the best.

This is a test meal, I shall observe how well he handles this type of food. Will he be able to eat it with his silver ware or use his fingers or will it be too slippery. Time will tell. We are really picky here about the foods that we eat. Al has to  have everything just right or he will choke.

The cat, Rhino has been acting so weird tonight. He keeps going into Al’s bedroom and meowing at him and Al said last night Rhino jumped up on his bed and sat next to him. Tonight Rhino goes in and looks at Al. Then he rubs up against the wall meowing. Then finally he lays up against the wall and stares at Al. I don’t know what he is all about tonight.

I am now officially on the payroll for caring for Al. I just still find it such a down right miracle from God, I am almost speechless. Only God could have put this plan together. They hold back a week which I think is normal and so my first check will be in a week and a half. It will be for today through Saturday night at midnight. I think I get paid ever week. My very own check, wow.

Well, it is time to change Al’s brief and get him into bed. Now I can say this has been a busy, nice day. Al did pretty well tonight. I have to add one more thing. The flies are bad here out in the country. We had rice along with our supper tonight. Flies would land on Al’s neck or face, and I was trying to keep them off of him with my hand. But when I wasn’t quick enough Al would try catching them with his fingers, and of course he ate his rice with his fingers.

If I could have gotten by with it and not embarrassed Al I would have snapped a photo. Not only was rice all over the floor. It was on his fingers, on his glasses, in his hair, and on his neck.

I knew I was going to have to clean this all up and the floor but I had to laugh. He looked so cute trying to swat those flies and the rice just added an extra little touch. So this day is over and I made a few dollars. Al did good and all is well at our little house.