Hello? Hello? I ask, what number are you calling please? I hear hello? Is this the person who wants help? I call in regard to your help ad. I find out within a minute that this is not the person for us. Only 17 years old, and has never had any experience. I thank her for calling, and tell her I need someone with more experience. The next phone call the speaker is so soft-spoken, I can barely hear. I am calling about the ad that you have in the paper? I am looking for some work. This lady, bless her heart, is 70 years old and wants something to do with her spare time. I fell in love with her spirit, but knew she could not handle a quick fall and his chatter may not be heard. The next call is from a high school student. She sounds very nice. I can hear her. She is wanting to work when she has time. She is involved with many school activities and has a part-time job after school. She doesn’t drive yet, so I would have to go pick her up and take her home. If I was going to have to take him out to go get her, I may as well take him with me. The phone rang a few more times, but I just didn’t feel a comfort here with the callers. The phone became silent for several hours before it rang again. Here was a young lady, who had some experience, but she needed to bring her three young children with her. This made me sad, as I think she may have worked out, but children and my brother never mix well. He picks more, gets agitated, and it isn’t worth the worry I would go through once I left the house. The phone went silent, so I took advantage of it and called a couple of home health care agencies in town. They were more than willing to help, as long as I needed a RN for skilled care. This wasn’t the case here. I was looking for someone to sit with him, so I could have time for myself, away from the care and situation. I next made a call to the government office, to see what they covered, and to my disappointment, only skilled care. I was wanting something for myself, for me, and they don’t cover anything for the caregiver. This upset me, because my selfish thoughts were, I NEED A BREAK!! I got off the phone, and the phone rang before I set the phone in its cradle. This was a person, that sounded good. She had experience. She was of the right age. She would be glad to play a game, or watch TV with him. She would even fix his lunch if I was gone over the meal time. I asked her if she could come out to meet him at a certain time, and she said she would be here. I hung up, a feeling of excitement rising inside of me. This would allow me to go get my brother’s birthday gift without him being present, and to get some out-door flowers for around the yard. I prepared his lunch, and tidied up the house a bit. Changed my clothes, and both, him and I, waited for her arrival. She never showed up. Wow! What a disappointment. My heart sunk. He went back to his room, to take his nap. I sat on the couch, and I began to cry. Not much, just a couple of tears. I don’t usually cry anymore about anything in life, but this did produce a tear or two. I needed help. I love my brother more than life itself, but I need a break, and so does he. If you were to ask him if he was getting tired of only seeing my face, he would grin and shake his head yes. I got on bended knee, and tell
telephone (Photo credit: Sean MacEntee)
God of my feelings and frustrations. I asked him for his help. He held out his hands to me and I placed my worries on him. The phone is still silent. My faith has to carry me through this. It is only a matter of time, before God will make the phone ring, answering my prayer.