Trip Gone Bad


think

I try to be nice and thoughtful in general, so I decided to take Al out to supper to the DQ. They have the Pumpkin Blizzards now, and I had a coupon plus they had a special going on for 2 double cheeseburgers for $4.00. I knew that he had not been out of the house for the weekend, plus he is still upset for the fact that as he says, he is not healed yet, so why is the shower girl and therapy people not wanting to keep coming here.

The office people from the Home Health Care told me this morning, that they were going to see what was going on, which to me, did not make me feel real secure, because if the office doesn’t know, then who does? All day the phone never rang, so I don’t know if anyone is coming back this week or not. I gave Al his shower this morning, but I should not have to do that part of his personal care, and I still don’t appreciate it hours later, that no one called me prior, and I just received a text message at 9am, saying the shower girl would not be back, and his shower was scheduled for 10:30. Great big notice you gave me, thank you very much!

So we went into the DQ, and he seemed happy about getting his blizzard and his food. The girl brought the food over to our table and we started to eat, and then he asks me if we can go to Wal-Mart to get him some slipper socks. I just had mentioned that this morning as I was putting clean clothes into his dresser drawers, that we should get some more now that the weather was turning colder. I told him that we could not go to Wal-Mart, as it was going to be dark in about forty-five minutes, and the deer are out now in early evening. I do not like to drive after dark, because I guess old age tends to make the eyesight worse, and I also did not want to get slammed by a deer.

He started to cry and when he gets upset his tremors pick up more speed, so I said how about we stop at the Dollar General store on the way home. I can run in and get them much faster than going to the big store. His reply was no. I said that I thought he wanted to get slipper socks and he stated yes he did, but he only wanted to get them from Wal-Mart.

Knowing him as well as I do, I knew he had a side purpose for wanting to go. He wanted to look at the toy section for more big cars. Now these cars are cool, I admit, but they also run from $15.00-$24.00. I have been working with him on a goal that he can only have these expensive cars once a month. When he didn’t want me to stop at the smaller store, I knew right a way it was the car section that was making him want to go to the larger store.

For the second time I explained quietly and nicely, that the answer was no. He began to raise his voice and cry harder, and the tremors were full force by now. I hate to say it folks, but I was beginning to get mad, not upset, mad.

If it is your young child throwing a fit, you can pick him up and remove him from the scene, but a big man, I can not do this. I told him to hush, to knock off the tears, that his game of throwing a fit was not going to work. I reminded him of where we were, and that people were staring at him, and reminded him that he didn’t like people to see his tremors so I was sure they did not want to hear him or see his tears.

He continued this bad behavior all through our meal. I snapped at him and told him that I was done being nice, that I was thinking of him when we decided to go out to eat, and I did not appreciate this bad treatment. So he stared at me with every bite he took. I was so angry at his fit, that I wanted to grab my supper and head for the safety of my car, but instead I snapped once more, and I picked up my ice water and told him if he did not cut the tears and zip his lips, I was going to have to splash him with my ice water, and then he says too loudly, that is abuse!

I got up and left my supper sit, and went to the car. I could see him from the front door as he sat there and ate, and he kept shaking his head back and forth, at the bad treatment he thought I was giving him. He is lucky, because what I wanted to do was pick him up and give him a spanking. Yep, I sure thought that. I don’t care how old he is, you don’t throw temper tantrums in public, when I am with you.

As I was sitting in the car watching him and waiting for him to finish, I looked up at the ceiling of my car and silently cried out, please someone help stop what is happening. I am tired, someone help me. If anyone listened nothing happened. He finished eating and put his jacket on, and came to the car and we came home. He is in his room sulking and crying and I am healing myself through blogging.