Calling Uncle Bob

Have you ever faced a difficult situation when you had to choose between sorting it out yourself, or asking someone else for an easy fix? What did you choose — and would you make the same choice today?

I am not one who usually talks about issues I am having in a personal way. I really don’t want others to worry about me or to feel pity towards me. I do have a close friend that I can whine to and cry and jump for joy with. I also have my daughter that I turn to but only as last resort. I just don’t want to cause worry.

I will dig into places and try new ideas to make things work for me when I am in a pickle. If I can’t figure it out or I end up spending more time watching TV than sleeping; this is when I end up reaching out to others.

When I decided to move to Kentucky from Indiana it was a real tough decision. I have two sons and their families. Along with knowing how to get around everywhere helps, which stores have what. I guess a lot of familiarity goes into our living in the same area for some time.

There were the issues of walking a way from my home. I didn’t mind leaving the snow, this is for sure. Making this decision was nerve-wracking, so many questions with no real answers. I finally had to write it down on paper, the pros and cons.

My friend didn’t want me to leave and my daughter wouldn’t really come out and say what she felt so that I would make my own decision and not blame her some time later. My car drives terrible in the winter snows since it is rear wheel drive.

My stability is not good with my Parkinson’s disease either. I was afraid of what the future held for me. I wanted to make the final choice before I got to the point I couldn’t get around that well.

I am glad in the end that I did leave. I got away from the frigid temperatures. I left the long-term ice behind. I still get to go home and see my family. I now live in a small area but I learned my way pretty good for where I need to go. Of course there are lots of roads I don’t know where they lead to, but hey, time is on my side with exploring.

Since I have been here I am much more unsteady on my feet. I have some tremors, and I have more days where I don’t feel that good anymore. I worry about things, but I did that back home too.

It was a tough decision but I believe that I did what was best as far as my health goes and the tough winters back home. As long as I can see my kids I am good, and glad that hard choice was made. My way of making this decision? Walk in faith and follow my gut feelings.


One Foot in Front of the Other

I am up early this morning again. I think this is becoming a habit. I wouldn’t mind if I had full days of work and didn’t want to take a nap within four hours. I flipped the TV on and went to the station where I could watch my super woman, I Love Lucy. She makes me laugh even when I don’t want to.

This episode is about their boat trip to Europe and she misses the boat. It made me think about how bad she wanted to go and what measures she would go to make this happen.

We all go through issues each day. Some are easy to solve, then there are others that require a thought process and at times the answer can not be seen through the fog. Yesterday I watched one of my favorite shows called Every Day Living with Joyce Meyers.

Her topic happened to be on choices  also. She made me see how many decisions we make each day. Anything from rising out of bed, to balancing our checkbooks. We make choices without even thinking about them.

Writing that last sentence made me wonder what choices I have made without thinking in my forty-five minutes of waking up. Let’s see, I decided to get up. I made the choice to light up my first cigarette. I chose to pour my first cup of coffee.

I decided to play Candy Saga before doing anything else. I easily channel surfed to the Hallmark station. I chose to turn the over head lights on instead of opening the window blinds.

Look at those decisions  I made without putting any thought into it. What do we do when we are faced with more difficult choices? What if the answer we want is so heavily weighted that we will do anything to have it our way as Lucy did in her show?

Lucy was determined to get to the ship she had missed. Her husband, Ricky and her best friends Fred and Ethel were on the ship and she, always being in some sort of silly mess had missed the ship.

She had no way of reaching that ship but by helicopter. To add laughter to her situation she screamed and demanded another way; but in the end she stepped out in faith. She was so afraid of riding in that bird with no door on her side, because she wanted to be reunited with her loved ones.

Do we step out in faith when we are unsure of the outcome? Stepping out in faith is such a simple process. All it entails is placing one foot in front of the other and walking. We are experts at that aren’t we? After all we learned to take our first steps somewhere between the ages of one and two.

I have not stepped out in faith many times in my life. Fear of the outcome has kept me on solid ground with my feet frozen in spot. It upsets me when I act like this because I may be missing out on something that would make my life fuller and richer.

I have learned since Al has passed that instead of me trying to beat myself up emotionally or crying because I am scared; to put my faith in God. I have an imaginary basket that I vision God holding. It is labeled Worry Basket.

Every time I face a decision that is not easily fixed, I toss it in God’s worry basket and try my best along with prayer to listen to God’s whisper and follow his direction. It does work.

It relieves stress and the spinning of thoughts in my mind. I have chosen this route with my moving this month. My moving is a big deal. I am listening to God speak to me. I am determined to do what is right. I have no doubt  I am walking towards is the right path; because I am allowing God to lead me and I know he wants only the best for me.

I want a change in my life. I need a different scenery to look at. I can want something so bad just like Lucy did. She wanted to get to that boat and she found a solution. I want to walk the path that  God has chosen for me so found praying and listening for his word is my solution. I am stepping out in faith. It can be scary, but I know God will never steer me wrong.