My Walk In Hope
It isn’t easy
Walking alone
Among the wolves
Hoping the walls
Don’t collapse
Around you
It’s easier…
My Walk In Hope
It isn’t easy
Walking alone
Among the wolves
Hoping the walls
Don’t collapse
Around you
It’s easier…
Walking alone
Among the wolves
Hoping the walls
Don’t collapse
Around you
It’s easier to
Carry the burdens
When there are
Two in agreement
But I am put
Here for a purpose
I strain to
Find my gift
My offering
To the world
So I will continue
To do what
I am called to do
Walk with one
Foot in front
Of the other
Until I am
Given the word
That now I can rest.
Ready For A Change
The weather is warm
But the mornings are cool
I can hear the creatures
They ain’t no fools
The air…
The weather is warm
But the mornings are cool
I can hear the creatures
They ain’t no fools
The air seems crisp
The nights much more so
I can feel fall I’m sure you know
Pumpkins and painted faces
Candy in bags
Orange lights decorated
Costumes made out of rags
I always loved this time of year
When summer exits and fall appears
A relief from the heat
And a new fun begins here.
Written by,
Terry Shepherd
09/04/2013
Daily Prompt; Trains, Planes, and Automobiles
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You’re going on a cross-country trip. Airplane,…
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You’re going on a cross-country trip. Airplane, train, bus, or car? (Or something else entirely — bike? Hot air balloon?)
Photographers, artists, poets: show us TRAVEL.
Well I have traveled by car, train, bus and plane. Although planes are quick, for me the going up into the air, the air pockets and ears popping are my least favorite way to travel. Cars are a nice way to travel. I would love to have a nice sports car that I can roll the top down and put it on cruise, take a nap and when I wake I can see the open land, and hopefully not crash. I can stop and eat when I want, take a cooler of food with me, and go potty when I wish.
I took a bus trip and was on it for a few days to get to my destination. Talk about all types of people. Old people, young people, screaming kids, whiny kids. And, no one told that the cherry smelling stainless steel toilet would put a hot ring around my poor butt, because it was summer and very hot. I don’t think I would ever take the bus again.
Now the train brings back some warm memories for me. I took a very long train ride to get where I was going. As soon as we got seated a good-looking guy came up to me and ask if he could join me.
I took one look at him and said yes. From that minute on we were pals. It was like we had known each other all our lives. We talked about everything under the sun. We walked the train and ate together in the dining car. We kept each other company. We really clicked, almost too good.
I enjoyed the rocking noise of the train hitting the track. It has this soothing noise for me and helps me to super relax. Yes, I enjoy a good train ride. So I guess if I want to meet cool guys, see the scenery and have a great time, I will go by train.
Does fear cause more damage than being alert to the immediate situation? I am thinking that it does to some point. Like a young tree being planted and its delicate roots taking hold and branching out; fear can also branch out in our mind and play havoc at later times.
Last night the fear that I have carried since Al came home would be that he would have one of those internal attacks with me. The second day home he did.
Although I realize that the M.S.A. is responsible for anything that is happening out of the normal for him, it still places the fear in me. It doesn’t help really that I know this could be the last chapters of Al’s life. It doesn’t even really matter that I have not seen this happen not once but now three times, I became afraid for him.
We had a fairly good day yesterday. He was a little crabby but he gets so frustrated. He hates it that he wets himself. He detest that he has to struggle to eat. His foot remained swollen all day and by evening the first signals were given to me.
The terrible sweats. He reminds me of someone who just got out of the shower and hasn’t dried off yet when he sweats. He started complaining about pain in the upper right side of his stomach. Then the number game started. One being the lowest and it rose to five.
I tried three times to put him to bed but he was so weak and my weakness became much more clear when I couldn’t get him in bed. I had to finally call Hospice and they sent help here.
I will be so glad to go to the Day Program tomorrow morning and speak to the manager and get these hours started for help to come in. I have been footing the entire bill since he came home Friday. I have had no help and if you need verification of this; just ask my neck and arms.
The company brought him a transport chair. I like this but the front wheels turn in all directions too often. I end up having to back him up and go forward to just get him over the carpet trim. He gets frustrated and so do I.
So hopefully Spider man will save the day starting tomorrow.
The nurse showed up and helped me to put him in bed. She checked him over and called her supervisor. The plan was to give him stronger pain medications and let the internal tremors have their party inside his chest while he slept through it.
But God knew that Al was tired. As soon as we got him comfy he fell asleep within minutes. He did look at the nurse and I could tell he was trying to tell her thank-you for showing up. She brought him an inner peace and God took care of the rest.
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The picture in my mind
Resembles this photo
I came across
Racing up the steps
Once again from school
Running back down the steps
To be with my friends
Slumber parties, skate-a-thons, driving my new second-hand car
My boyfriend walks up to meet my parents for the first time
My family walking down together to go to church
Walking slowly down as we attend funerals of loved ones.
Watching Daddy walking up the stairs coming home from work
Where have all the days gone
Have I really gotten older?
Am I all grown up
Now I sit here with this picture in my mind
Smiling as I travel down memory lane
If only I could reach out and touch
Mommy and Daddy’s hands once again.
Terry Shepherd
03/17/2013
You’re locked in a room with your greatest fear. Describe what’s in the room.
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I am locked in a room with my biggest fear of all. It is dark. As I use my fingers for my feet I feel my way. I can feel cracks and rough edges. I can distinguish even lines going back and forth. I believe they are cement blocks. Each feels the same as the prior. Cold and no heart, useless to me, but providing its job of keeping me inside the four walls.
I can feel rough edges of cardboard, but it feels thicker. I try to tear at it and shred it away from what ever it is hiding. The fibers are too strong, as I feel the piercing of my fragile skin raking across the edges. The heat tells me that my own fresh blood is seeping out of my flesh that holds my soul and entire being together.
As I feel farther I feel cold metal. I run my fingers over the arches and feel smooth cold tubing. With a grit sheath going across from edge to edge, I discover that it is a strong bench. I sit down softly making sure that I have not over estimated its weight. I can feel pricks of metal scorning my thin pants that I have on. No matter what position I place my body, I am freshly pierced once again.
I stand up and walk the fourth wall and it has wrought iron post. I reach as high as my arms will stretch and realize with no doubt that this is iron bars, made to keep me in. Controlled by another human’s touch of the keys being held on the outside of my prison.
The floor is cement as I shuffle my feet along the darkness. There is no heart in its make-up. It shows no compassion for wanting me to be let out. There is no escape. There is no toilet. There is no table or food.
Will I be allowed to die here? Will I starve to death, or hang myself from the fear that is greater than reality. I am locked in this room. The room being my mind that is consumed by my greatest fear, darkness. The mind playing shuffling games, helping me to believe that what I have here is nothing. No way to escape, but yet if I slow down, take a deep breath and allow the mind to think instead of wander, I could turn the handle attached to the bars and walk out the door to freedom.