My Walk In Hope
It isn’t easy
Among the wolves
Hoping the walls
My Walk In Hope
It isn’t easy
Among the wolves
Hoping the walls
Among the wolves
Hoping the walls
It’s easier to
Carry the burdens
When there are
Two in agreement
But I am put
Here for a purpose
I strain to
Find my gift
To the world
So I will continue
To do what
I am called to do
Walk with one
Foot in front
Of the other
Until I am
Given the word
That now I can rest.
Chocolates and peppermints
Are the things that I remember
When I think about you.
Taking my fingers in your big hand
We walk the block and a half
I knew in my heart it was hard for you
But you gave me memories and lots of laughs.
The bell rang clear over the door above
The owner knew our faces
You let me go and choose my desires
Feeling so grown-up in familiar places.
Wooden boards creaking neath my feet
As I walked from glass to glass
You standing on the side watching me
Being patient as the minutes passed.
Finally I had made my decisions
And you handed me my money
I picked a gumball and some licorice too
A lollipop and pieces of honey.
I handed the owner all I had
And he made the register ring
He put my goodies in a paper bag
I turned and waved as we began to leave.
I will never forget those days of long ago
You were my hero the one I loved
Now when I pass a candy store
I stop and think of you up above.
The picture in my mind
Resembles this photo
I came across
Racing up the steps
Once again from school
Running back down the steps
To be with my friends
Slumber parties, skate-a-thons, driving my new second-hand car
My boyfriend walks up to meet my parents for the first time
My family walking down together to go to church
Walking slowly down as we attend funerals of loved ones.
Watching Daddy walking up the stairs coming home from work
Where have all the days gone
Have I really gotten older?
Am I all grown up
Now I sit here with this picture in my mind
Smiling as I travel down memory lane
If only I could reach out and touch
Mommy and Daddy’s hands once again.
Now I have always known that money was dirty. I learned that real quick when I was working in the public eye where money was quickly exchanged. My fingers some days look like I had been working in a small flower garden.
I tuned in on it and I was really shocked at what I had been missing out there. There were work opportunities that had been passing me by. The money that could be made was more than in my wildest dreams. Thousands, yes thousands. All I had to do was be myself.
I had to buy some fancy clothes. I may have to take a one-time class updatin my lady etiquette manners. Maybe buy some jewelry and oh, the most important thing, go to Weight Watchers to get slim and sexy looking.
For only four hours worth of smiling and maybe a few favors being done, I could earn five thousand dollars. That was the least I could earn. Do you realize I could stay at home keep my passion with my writing and friends? I could work part-time and still have plenty of time for all of you.
As I watched the show I compared myself to some of the business owners and knew that I had a lot of work to do before I could open my own business. I would have to stop my fun and healthy exercises and get my own personal trainer.
I may have to seek out a plastic surgeon and have some bumps and curves added here and there. Oh and by the way, while you are adding Mr. Doctor, can you take out this extra five-pounds around my waist? It really has been bothering me ever since I had kids.
Now I needed to go visit one of those second-hand stores. I was going to have to practice walking the run way with my new four-inch heels. I guess I would look pretty silly falling in front of all of those prestigious clients. So the goal for one day was walk, walk, and hold the chest up and out.
I noticed that a very important piece of evidence included in my resume needed to be my education. Did this mean that my local high school education was not good enough. Well what about my local community college classes, did they count? Was I going to have to send a way to one of those phony internet companies and have some printed framed degrees made up?
I really don’t believe that this work opportunity was a gift from God. Knowing this before hand, would I be spending all of this quality time with myself only to fail down the road? I know that when I walk the wrong path, I always have to pay the price but, I would have plenty of money to tide me over while getting my dignity and confidence back, right?
Well after watching the one hour entertaining and educational show, I flipped the channel over to the Golden Girls. Although it sounded mysterious, glamorous and exciting, I don’t think being a high-class prostitute is for me after all. Thank you little television for letting me see a tiny dark side of what I have been missing in the world. I guess I will go back to praying and listening for an answer.
Do you have a favorite quote that you return to again and again? What is it, and why does it move you?
I used to have a favorite saying
I would think on this as I was laying
On my bed so late at night
Waiting for sleep and morning light
I read it somewhere long ago
It was in a book tis all I know
Don’t put off til tomorrow what you can do today
These are the words I would always say
Keep the mind sharp and body on the move
Don’t get slow, don’t lose your groove
I have let it slide a bit for now
As I concentrate on learning how
To realize that I have done real good
On taking care of Al and his moods
Slowly I am learning another way
To occupy my time and day
Learning who I am all about
Wanting to sing and give a shout
Hi neighbor, hi friend and hello class
Wearing a smile, as I shrink my __ss
I have made the start I am here to say
Digging up the old me I am on my way
Today is the day I am going to say
Don’t put off til tomorrow what you can do today.
If you were asked to spend a year living in a different location, where would you choose and why?
You know that saying, curiosity can kill you? This is one time I would choose to take that route. Every once in a while I have this dream. It is precisely the same each occurring dream. There is a red brick path that you walk on. The bricks are formed in to a large circle and seem to run for miles. They are surrounded by many walkers, and beautiful colored businesses.
When I look off in the distance, I see blue skies with white feathers of clouds. In the center of these Wizard of Oz bricks, there sits a round bench. In the center of this stands a very tall tree. I don’t know what kind of tree it is, but it is always a welcome sight, when the days are long and hot.
There are friendly faces of older people. A few bicycles are riding by with young people waving as if we know each other. There is various conversations going on all around me as people crowd close on the bench. We have brought tiny broken pieces of bread, and we all toss the bread to the pigeons as we talk.
This whole scenario is in Stuttgart Germany. I don’t know if I was there and it is real. Or maybe it is a place I have seen in a book or felt in a dream. I lived in Stuttgart many years ago as a young bride, while my husband served in the military. Unfortunately, I just can’t remember this scene when I think back.
If I had to live abroad for a year, I would definitely go to this part of the world. I would want to go to the center of the city and find my cement bench surrounded by peaceful shade, friendly birds and chatty friends. I remember a few words from Germany, just enough to get me by in case I get lost. Yes, Stuttgart would be the ideal place. I would already feel at home.
She hid behind the dumpster in the alley, waiting for it to go by. Her heart was beating so hard, she knew it was about to burst out of her body. It went by, she waited a moment, and then slowly, barely touching her feet to the ground, she emerged out into view. She took small, even steps, counting each one, making sure that each was of the same distance. She had a distance to walk home. She had just gotten off of her part-time job, and today, unfortunately, it was a night shift. She wanted to use the front door, but the manager always insisted they exit the rear door. As she came out of the alley, and was stepping on to the sidewalk, she forgot that construction was going on in her block where she worked. There were many objects in her way, making it difficult to walk straight ahead. She had to walk under the awning. She noticed the tall, stiff, board leaning against the wall, and became frozen in her steps. She knew she would be safest from running in to the construction company’s tools, going through the board with all those holes in it, since it was dark, but she didn’t know if she could force herself to walk that route. It was making a sort of bridge over her head. She pondered, and chewed on her nails. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw it! There was that thing that had scared her so badly. It was crossing the street. She didn’t take time to think. She ran through the tunnel, and continued running until she came to the next block. She stopped to catch her breath, inhaling large amounts of air. Slowly she could feel her heart slow down. She started walking again, making sure she counted her steps, making sure she didn’t go to fast or too slow. She didn’t want to step in any holes, or step on any cracks. She had to walk for about fifteen minutes before she arrived at her home. A mist formed, and fog was beginning to surround her. The eerie trees above her looked like long, ugly fingers reaching out to grab her. She caught her breath, but kept walking, trying to keep track of her steps. She heard a trash can being knocked over, and saw a raccoon run across the street from fear of the sounds he had created. Above her she heard an owl signaling to her that he was watching her. Finally, she made it to the front door of her home. She took out her house keys from her pocket, and let herself in. She took two steps at a time up the stairs, relieved when she had shut her bedroom door behind her. Why did her boss make her work the night shift on Friday the 13th? Never again!