I Will Survive


I was watching a video my daughter-in-law made of my youngest granddaughter on Facebook just now. She is trying so hard to say mama and Dada, but squeals of delight come out of her mouth and her smile is so big.

All of a sudden I felt wet tears stroll down my cheeks. I realized that I will struggle to hold the new babies in the family when I see them next. I was already having issues holding the second youngest grandson before I left my home town.

I tried to blame it on the fact that little E. is such a big boy, but the truth is, each week I get a little less stable. It doesn’t take much walking for my entire leg muscles to start quivering inside and the next thing they do is make me feel like I am going to fall.

Picking up little ones and trying to hold them is not going to be safe for them nor me. I will have to go back to the way we let young children hold their baby siblings; on their laps.

I hate it. I am not feeling sorry for myself. I have lots of life still in me, but I can’t deny that things are changing for me. It makes me cry to think that one day I may become a problem to my family.

I never want this Parkinson’s to get to the place I can’t take care of myself. I don’t want to believe that my children are pondering on what to do with mom. I always joked when the topic of getting old came up before, stating that people could just toss my ass in a nursing home.

After being so closely involved with Al’s care those six months in the nursing home, I don’t wish it on me or anyone else in this world. I know, nursing homes are a blessing to some, but for me, I see it as an end of life. A way of marking off the calendar of how many days I have left to live.

Sounds stupid and sad doesn’t it? I guess I have been working in nursing homes way too long. There are good ones but there are many bad ones. The care can be adequate and state approved, or if you have an abundance of funds, you can get a top-notch one.

No matter what, I don’t want to dwell on the what ifs, but when I see the little ones in my family, I know that there are many years between them and me. I can’t complain about anything.

I have great kids. I had a great marriage at one time. I have a roof over my head and food on the table. I just don’t want to stop yet. I am not ready to deal with anything that may slow me down.

There is so much life out there to live yet. Books to write, words to say, photos to take. I will continue to move forward as long as God allows me to, I will survive.

 

 

Talk About Your Medicines Month


ARC_Talk_About_Meds_Banner_Terry1

The other day I made a post about Marijuana, pain pills, and natural alternatives. Since that day I have been contacted by a very nice lady named Judy Cohen. She works with the American Recall Center.

Half of her job is educating individuals on recall updates. The other half is connecting with individuals to help spread awareness online. I find the work that she does is outstanding.

The goal?

The American Recall Center provides drug and medical device recall information alongside practical healthcare information and support. They aim to build the most comprehensive resource on the Internet for timely and trusted material regarding healthcare topics that matter to the consumer. The team at ARC is dedicated to helping consumers find accurate information with ease.

We, the patients  go to our professionals but did you know you  have choices? We listen to what they say but many times we believe and do not ask questions. I felt very honored to be asked to be a part of this team to let others know that we all need to talk about our medicines along with helping to spread the word of American Recall Center.

Here is a link that I am providing to you so that you may better understand what this is all about. If I can help in any way about  questions you may want to write down to ask your provider, please ask me or contact Judy Cohen. Her email address is:

Judy Cohen <judy.cohen@recallcenter.com>;

I also want to share with you the latest report on a new medication that is available to you. The title is called:

Problematic Findings in New Xarelto Study

The link I will provide for you is:

http://www.recallcenter.com/problematic-findings-in-new-xarelto-study/

 

Xarelto is;

XARELTO® is a prescription medicine used to reduce the risk of stroke and blood clots in people with atrial fibrillation, not caused by a heart valve problem. For patients currently well-managed on warfarin, there is limited information on how XARELTO® and warfarin compare in reducing the risk of stroke.

XARELTO® is also a prescription medicine used to treat deep vein thrombosis and pulmonary embolism, and to help reduce the risk of these conditions occurring again.

XARELTO® is also a prescription medicine used to reduce the risk of forming a blood clot in the legs and lungs of people who have just had knee or hip replacement surgery.

Thank-you dear friends for stopping by my post and taking the time to read this.

60 minutes and death with dignity


Terry:

food for thought

Originally posted on the dr. says:

once again a mainstream program, 60 minutes, has approached the subject of death with dignity all too briefly.

the following is a brief conversation between the reporter anderson cooper and barbera mancini. the conversation started with the discussion about brittany maynard, a young woman with a brain tumor that moved to oregon in order to end her life with dignity:

A young woman with brain cancer named Brittany Maynard made news recently when she spoke about her decision to end her life rather than succumb to the last ravages of her disease. Maynard moved to Oregon because it has a law that enables terminally ill people to obtain a lethal dose of barbiturates.

Whether doctors and caregivers should be allowed to help someone like Maynard hasten her own death is the subject of a long-running, state-by-state battle. Our story tonight is about a woman who was prosecuted for allegedly helping…

View original 253 more words

The Green Thing!


Terry:

some humor among the truth

Originally posted on MKG- Memories-Keepsakes-Gifts:

I received this on Facebook…

Such a true statement coming from the older generation…

Oh, no!… that’s me!…

lived this!
www.butterbin.com&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;
Checking out at the store, the young cashier suggested to the older woman, that she should bring her own grocery bags because plastic bags weren't good for the environment.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;
The woman apologized and explained, &quot;We didn't have this green thing back in my earlier days.&quot; The young clerk responded, &quot;That's our problem today. Your generation did not care enough to save our environment for future generations.&quot;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;
She was right -- our generation didn't have the green thing in its day.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;
Back then, we returned milk bottles, soda bottles and beer bottles to the store. The store sent them back to the plant to be washed and sterilized and refilled, so it could use the same bottles over and over. So they really were truly recycled. But we didn't have the green thing back in our day.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;
Grocery stores bagged our groceries in brown paper bags, that we reused for numerous things, most memorable besides household garbage bags, was the use of brown paper bags as book covers for our schoolbooks.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;
This was to ensure that public property, (the books provided for our use by the school) was not defaced by our scribbling's. Then we were able to personalize our books on the brown paper bags. But too bad we didn't do the green thing back then.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;
We walked up stairs, because we didn't have an escalator in every store and office building. We walked to the grocery store and didn't climb into a 300-horsepower machine every time we had to go two blocks. But she was&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;
right. We didn't have the green thing in our day.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;
Back then, we washed the baby's diapers because we didn't have the throwaway kind. We dried clothes on a line, not in an energy-gobbling machine burning up 220 volts -- wind and solar power really did dry our clothes back in our early days. Kids got hand-me-down clothes from their brothers or sisters, not always brand-new clothing. But that young lady is right; we didn't have the&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;
green thing back in our day.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;
Back then, we had one TV, or radio, in the house -- not a TV in every room. And the TV had a small screen the size of a handkerchief (remember them?), not a screen the size of the state of Montana.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;
In the kitchen, we blended and stirred by hand because we didn't have electric machines to do everything for us.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;
When we packaged a fragile item to send in the mail, we used wadded up old newspapers to cushion it, not Styrofoam or plastic bubble wrap.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;
Back then, we didn't fire up an engine and burn gasoline just to cut the lawn. We used a push mower that ran on human power. We exercised by working so we didn't need to go to a health club to run on treadmills that&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;
operate on electricity. But she's right; we didn't have the green thing back then.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;
We drank from a fountain when we were thirsty instead of using a cup or a plastic bottle every time we had a drink of water. We refilled writing pens with ink instead of&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;
buying a new pen, and we replaced the razor blades in a razor instead of throwing away the whole razor just because the blade got dull. But we didn't have the green thing back then.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;
Back then, people took the streetcar or a bus and kids rode their bikes to school or walked instead of turning their moms into a 24-hour taxi service. We had one electrical outlet in a room, not an entire bank of sockets to power a dozen appliances. And we didn't need a&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;
computerized gadget to receive a signal beamed from satellites 23,000 miles out in space in order to find the nearest burger joint.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;
But isn't it sad the current generation laments how wasteful we old folks were just because we didn't have the green thing back then?&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;
Please forward this on to another selfish old person who needs a lesson in conservation from a smart-ass young person.

www.butterbin.com
Checking out at the store, the young cashier suggested to the older woman, that she should bring her own grocery bags because plastic bags weren’t good for the environment.
The woman apologized and explained, “We didn’t have this green thing back in my earlier days.” The young clerk responded, “That’s our problem today. Your generation did not care enough to save our environment for future generations.”
She was right — our generation didn’t have the green thing in its day.
Back then, we returned milk bottles, soda bottles and beer bottles to the store. The store sent them back to the plant to be washed and sterilized and refilled, so it could use the same bottles over and over. So they really were truly recycled. But we didn’t…

View original 545 more words

The Girl Who Tricked


Rich was a junior in high school. He had parents that were well-known in the small community. His mom was a nurse at the local hospital. His father was an estate attorney.

Rich always carried a bit too much flare when it came to his confidence levels. He knew he was popular. He knew his looks were better than most guys in his class. He wore the best clothes, the newest shoes.

But what lacked in Rich was the caring attitude that we so desperately need in this world. He was a ME guy. Everything he did and thought of was within the circle of his eyes.

It was nearing Halloween. A group of his friends were tossing ideas around on what tricks they could pull off without getting caught. After several talks they decided to soap and toilet paper the minister’s home.

Rich had his eye on Darlene, the minister’s daughter for months. She was a knock-out. Curvy little body, long blonde hair, sky-blue eyes. The problem was, Darlene wouldn’t give Rich the time of day.

He would leave notes at her locker. He had flowers sitting on her front window of her car. He had even taken the time to go to the store and buy her the most expensive card he could find and mail it to her. Nothing worked. He could have charmed the pants off a frog easier than he could get Darlene to look his way.

The night before Halloween, the group of guys went shopping for the soap and toilet paper. With all supplies bought, he anxiously awaited darkness to arrive Halloween night.

The guys gathered at the local burger joint. After eating they got in their cars and parked in the downtown public parking area. They put their black masks and gloves on and started towards the minister’s home.

There they stood, all silenced, excitement racing through their blood, scoping out the property. A rustling could be heard within the trees. No one took notice as it was a fall evening and there was a breeze that made you want to grab for your jacket.

Each one started taking one step closer to the front porch. As they approached they saw the big oak tree that during a hot summer day would provide ample shade. They got their toilet paper out and started tossing it up in the air. Before long it looked like long, white icicles were streaming from the roof top.

They covered their mouths to quiet the rumbles of laughter as they stood back and admired the work they had performed. Proud of their performance, a few of them sneaked around to the side of the house. They soaped the windows until no one could see either in or out of them.

Rich hung back as he wanted to be the sole person to soap Darlene’s car. He took the two bars of soap out of his pants pockets and walked towards her car. With one bar in his hand he started decorating her side windows as if he was an infamous painter.

He did both sides and the back window. Walking towards the front window he heard the rustling of the tree leaves again. This time it was a much rougher sound and it caused him to stop in his tracks and look up towards the skies.

At that precise moment, a creature jumped from the trees. It pounced on him so hard it knocked him to the ground. He immediately covered his face with his hands to protect himself.

He tried screaming out for help to his friends, but no sounds were to be heard. Two huge wings covered his body and whisked him up in the two, giant claw feet and carried him off to a tree down the street.

The creature let loose of her hold on him and he dropped gently in a pocket of branches. ” So, I hear you want to meet me. I have felt your stares through my clothes. I can hear your mind letting me know that you want nothing more to do with me than to get my clothes off and make a score you can brag to your friends about.”

Rich opened his eyes and looked up into piercing blue eyes. He could pick out the familiar sounds of Darlene’s voice, but this voice was ragged. A scary and lulling voice that make him want to pee his pants right there.

He started to say something. Anything that would help him escape the claws of this creature, but she leaned into him and covered his mouth with her beak. Forcing his mouth open she breathed a terrible taste into him.

It made him feel instantly dizzy, light-headed. He was scared. He tried to wiggle his way out from under her, but she had the wings of super powers. He tried once again to scream for his buddies, but his mouth became dry and frozen.

Darlene flipped him over on his stomach and started picking at his hair with that sharp beak. Within a few minutes she had picked him clean. He felt his head and tried to scream as he discovered he was totally bald.

She poked him over and over on all sides of his neck, leaving large welts. He looked worse than any Frankenstein anyone had ever seen. She flipped him back to his back side and picked at his forehead. She picked until she had opened an area wide enough to see part of  his skull and brain.

She ate a small part of him and then blew in some hot liquid out of her nostrils. With pieces of fine twigs and leaves she sewed him back together, like a newly formed nest. She picked him up, and flew him back to where her car was and dropped him down on the ground.

” I hope you enjoyed meeting me face to face Rich. I doubt you will ever forget this Halloween. In fact, I am pretty sure you will not even remember the Rich you once knew. For you will never walk the halls of school with an attitude that you are all that and more. You will coward in the halls, you will duck into the bathrooms. You will sit in the back row of classes. You will learn a lesson that not even your parents could ever teach you.”

With that, she flew back up into her tree, waiting for the next victim.

 

 

 

ugly

Do You Want to Help Me?


I am pretty well settled in my home now and that takes care of the big stuff. I have my health insurance which will start Jan. 1. I also have a part-time job which I start this Tuesday.

Except for learning my way around this quaint little town, and meeting new people, I am ready to begin thinking about writing a new book. I have been asked to write a pamphlet book on more detailed information about what MSA is really like. This book, if I choose it, would be pretty blunt, and may cause weakness in the stomach at times.

Others have asked me to compile a small book of my collection of poetry I write. I like either of these, but I want to try something that is more into the type of book that when you pick it up to read, you smile, or laugh, or don’t want to put it down.

Now that statement being written opens a whole new can of worms. Plenty of ideas to pop out all over the table. The problem is, I am not popping out anywhere, so I am coming to you.

Most of you have known me for a few years now and you probably know me better than I know myself at times, so  how about it? Can you give me your thoughts and opinions on a topic I should write about?

books2

Trick or Treat


Trick or Treat

Twinkling stars

Eerie sounds

Flying ghosts

All around

 

Frozen and Batman

Zombies and more

Holding out sacks

For goodies galore

 

Sounds of cats

Screaming at nights

Hooty hoot owls

Screeching delight

 

The one night of year

When excitement is due

With witches and goblins

And everyone says BOO!

Written by,

Terry Shepherd

10.18.2014

Kids-in-halloween-costumes

 

 

Marijuana, Pain Pills, and Natural Alternatives


I am sore and unsteady today. My feelings are more of sadness, thinking too much or maybe not too much of my brother Al. But, I changed my mind about blogging tonight after reading a dear friends post tonight. Her name is Sheri and here is here website.

http://sheridegrom.wordpress.com

Her post brought back the hole in my heart caused from the  overly medicated state  my brother became from medications with his MSA. I knew years ago that Al may die an earlier death than so-called normal people. This is true of so many that are mentally challenged.

I asked myself why bother. Why go back into details of my brother. It won’t bring him back. In fact, it places those sad memories on the front burner of my brain. I then knew that the reason I wanted to write was because I felt drawn to speak up on Al’s behalf for anyone who has a terminal illness or an illness that is ongoing like what I have; Diabetes.

In our Western world, doctors pump pills and patients usually take them without questions. We tend to lean on the idea that if we don’t pop pills, we can not be healed. We take so many antibiotics that our bodies can no longer fight infections as well, as it becomes immune, therefore causing what we have today known as Super Bugs.

The biggest Super Bug we have at this time is MRSA.

Staphylococcus aureus (MRSA)

Staphylococcus aureus (or informally referred to as “Staph”) manifests itself in many ways, but is probably most famously known as “flesh-eating bacteria”. About 25% to 30% of the general population is colonized with Staph in their nose or on the surface of their skin, but if it finds its way beyond the skin barrier, it can cause a variety of infections, ranging from minor skin infections, including pimples or boils, to more serious infections that can lead to fatal outcomes, such as pneumonia or sepsis.

For many years, penicillin and methicillin were considered excellent treatments for Staph infections. Strains of Staph that are resistant to methicillin were first observed in hospitals and other healthcare facilities. However, in recent years, community-associated MRSA has become more prevalent. A recent article in JAMA estimated that in 2005, MRSA infected nearly 9,000 Americans, in whom 1 in 5 infections were deadly.

My brother was definitely very ill with MSA. It was a rare disease with no cure in sight. I don’t blame any doctors; for all they know how to do at this date is prescribe pills or liquids and patches for pain.

Again I repeat, each pill we take causes some level of side-effect. There are medications that can cause death. Even with my Diabetes, some of my medications slow down my metabolism, which keeps us diabetics on the heavy side. What we need is a medication that speeds up our metabolisms, helping us to lose weight, therefore keeping our sugar levels under control.

My brother was put on heavy-duty drugs to try to keep the pain away, but the high price he paid was a sooner death. Medications to help pain cause other infections. They can change the heart beat, cause UTI’s, even make our brains go hay wire.

If I could have had more choices in Al’s level of care and I had an abundance of funds, I swear after seeing what he suffered from side-effects, I would have moved us to a state where Marijuana was legal.

Sure, he was going to die, but just maybe he could have had some sort of normalcy during his months remaining. Instead what I saw was a brother who saw flowers dancing on the floor, or uncontrollable laughter or tears.

If I get a terminal illness, I don’t want to use the rat poison that is in Chemo Therapy. I want to try other countries ways of treating illnesses, without all the pill popping. There is herbal and Chinese, really there is so much more out in the world than what we see in front of our noses.

I guess I am done posting. I want you to  understand if I need a medication or you need one, I agree with going to the doctor, but a terminal illness; now that is the topic I am talking about.

I will always remember what my dad said three days before he died of Multiple Myeloma; which is; Multiple myeloma is a type of cancer that is caused by malignant plasma cells that proliferate in the bone marrow and produce abnormally high amounts of a special protein.

He said he would have turned down the chemo and lived out his days with a natural outlook. No chemo, no tiredness, or vomiting, or weakness. He said he would have traded all that in for just a few more months of feeling better. I agree with him, after I took care of him and saw how he suffered, and worse yet, died anyways.

I know that seeing so much illness in my career, I don’t really want to know what is going on with me. I am afraid that I won’t enjoy my life. I will become obsessed with how I feel, doctors, medications. I would rather try a natural healing and enjoy my kids and grandkids to the end.

book 2