Raise Me Back Up


I knew it was coming, but not today, please not today. I have to wipe my tears, please wait. Alright I am back. I can’t do this. I can do this right . I can’t take the words that have been spoken to me. I want to hide, please hide me. I feel like I am going to fall apart. My heart is broken, and still breaks even more.

Too many calls today from my brother’s new home. Oh God, can I write this? Please, someone help me, but there is no one here. It is the television and me. I can’t get healed. Too many times I try to get up and get knocked back down.

Al changed, something happened. How can I help? What can I do? He doesn’t know things. He fell today. He is not being able to swallow correctly. They have now asked me to get his walker and bring it home.

They have studied him for a while and say he is getting too weak. He has to use a wheelchair from now on. Every thing he does now has to be supervised and watched. He is forgetting how to do things.

I was told he may live for a long time but he will be immobile sooner then they wanted. They asked me not to come today as he is very confused.  They said he is angry at every one and sees no more hope in his life.

He is crying. I am crying. Oh Lord raise me up to the challenges you are forcing me to see.

I am to go in and pick-up his walker tomorrow and have the care plan meeting at 1. All I can hear in my head is, he may live for a long time but he will be immobile. Please Lord, help him, calm his soul, bring him peace. Deliver the strength I need to do this. I love him so much Lord, he is my brother…………..Amen

hear my prayer

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59 thoughts on “Raise Me Back Up

  1. Our heart-felt prayers are ascending at this very moment…Susie and I love you…and sometimes it is is difficult to write these words in the midst of others pain…but then again isn’t that when we need them the most?…so here they are…be encouraged!

  2. It’s so hard to be standing as a bystander here, not able to give a big hug … make you a good cup of coffee … fix you something to eat – let you cry your eyes out until you fall to sleep.
    Feel so deeply for you both.

  3. Pingback: A Prayer Request | Loopyloo's

  4. Lifting you and your brother up to our Lord God… may He comfort you both in His Will and give you both His Peace that surpasses all understanding, in Christ Jesus Holy Name.

  5. We are continuing in prayer for you and Al.

    1) But now thus saith the LORD that created thee, O Jacob, and he that formed thee, O Israel, Fear not: for I have redeemed thee, I have called [thee] by thy name; thou [art] mine.
    2) When thou passest through the waters, I [will be] with thee; and through the rivers, they shall not overflow thee: when thou walkest through the fire, thou shalt not be burned; neither shall the flame kindle upon thee.
    (Isaiah 43:1-2)

  6. You have my prayers for the both of you. My heart goes out to you both. God bless you and Al. May you rest in His peace knowing that your prayers will be heard and He will provide.

    ~Terra

  7. You say he fell??? I gather he is OK??? To see our special loved ones in so much unhappiness…and pain…is probably harder than death…Suffering on his side…physically…
    and suffering on your side…mentally… I too, wish I could be there to help in some way…but, if you ever just want to “talk”…feel free to call…I feel as close to you as many friends I have…mkg

  8. Terri,

    My heart goes out to you. I am praying fervently for both you and Al. I pray the Lord gives you wisdom as you go to your brother’s Care Plan Meeting and advocate on his behalf.

    Lord, in Jesus’ name, surround Terri with Your peace and a sense of purpose, as she prepares herself for her brother’s Care Plan Meeting. Give her the strength to stand firm on the things that she must be firm on, and Father, help her to be calm. Give Terri Your words to speak at the right time, and when she must be silent and listen, Lord, help her.

    Father, I also pray for Al, because Lord, You are our peace. Therefore, I ask You to visit Al right now, and comfort him. Soothe his spirit, Lord, and give him rest tonight. Father, arise and show Yourself strong on Al’s behalf, and let him receive the best possible care. Lord, I also ask You to give Al favor with his nurses and aides. Let them not only provide good quality care for him, but Lord, let them love him as they would their own family members.

    I ask all of this in Jesus’ name, amen.

    Much love Terri,
    Cheryl

  9. Terry you can do this – I know you can. I get this kind of call from Anthony’s lodge occasionally – especially if he falls. The fall itself makes him vey confused but it passes. At least the staff are paying more attention to Al. You are both in my heart.

  10. Terri, I am so very sorry about your brother’s decline. These times are beyond our comprehension, but we manage to muddle along and get through them the best that we can. Al understands you love him, and that thought can comfort you.

  11. I join with you in your prayer…

    Like a patchwork quilt, I hope I added on another piece of fabric with my prayer for you and your brother. May you soon have enough squares for the angels to make a big enough prayer quilt to cover him.
    Shalom!

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