Yesterday, the tremors finally stopped. I felt like a new woman. It was rough during those times. Walking is very difficult because when my legs tremor, they also become weak.
I read this post on Facebook about a woman who also has Parkinson’s. She had been in a public place and someone made a comment loud enough for her to her. It was pertaining to her being drunk. Thankfully, she put them in their place.
I have thought that too about myself. How do I look to others? How bad do I sway back and forth? Do I look drunk to others?
No one knows unless you have gait issues, how hard we fight to look and act so called “normal”. For me, I have to concentrate very hard to walk as straight as possible. When in public, I have no choice but to hang on to the cart, or ride the public scooter. If I know I am going some place without special equipment offered; I take my brother’s scooter.
Stores are not thinking about wheelchairs and scooters when they display their clothing and miscellaneous racks. I went to Macy’s. There were several areas my scooter, which is not a big one, could not fit through the small spaces; especially the purse department. I had to get off my scooter if I wanted to look closely at choices offered, or forget looking all together and move on to a different area. I wish businesses would consider a different layout for their racks. Should I let Macy’s know my thoughts?
I don’t get out too often. When I have doctor’s visits, I try to stop at my son’s house. It is a mood lifter for sure. The grandchildren are there, and I can guarantee some good laughs.
I also live a half-hour from my home town and it may not be a big issue to most; but for me, keeping my feet on the gas pedal is something of a chore. This causes me to stay around my own area more or stay at home. I sometimes wonder how much longer I will be able to drive, but I don’t like to think of that.
When we become older, life changes, and most of these changes occur with looks, strength, and the ability to run around like we used to. I like to go to town during the week days. The weekend days are filled to the brim in the stores with people, children running, and plain chaos.
Some things in my life I don’t get as upset over as I did when I was younger. An example would be a spotless home. I used to be a fanatic about it, but no more. Now I give myself a pat on the back, like tonight. No tremors, so I was able to mop the kitchen and bathroom floor and sweep the house. It felt good. You have to grab those good moments and run with them, in case the next day is a set-back.
Life is good when it is good, and it is bad when it is bad. I vote for the good to continue.
One day you look into your mirror
And you reach up and touch your face
You notice dips and drops
Taking up once silky space.
The years, they slip right by us
Most times we just don’t see
Or perhaps we just ignore them
Praying time will stop and seize.
Years of smiles around the lips
Worry lines around the eyes
Hard work has lined its marks
Dark circles from saying goodbyes.
A history we now wear
With pride for what we’ve done
You smile back at yourself
Realizing a new chapter has begun.