Daily Archives: September 16, 2014
Pumpkin Sheet Cake with Brown Butter Cream Cheese Frosting
That’s Absurd/ The Daily Post Challenge
For this week’s writing challenge, introduce a sense of magic or absurdity into your post.
- Write a fictional piece that incorporates the everyday life we’re familiar with — work, family, errands — and add a surprise twist through an imaginary character, absurd turn of events, or Sci-Fi-esque setting.
- We all know that sometimes life itself is a bit nonsensical. Tell us a story when you were going about your own business and something completely ridiculous or inexplicable happened. What did you do, and how did you react?
- Tap into your inner child and conjure up some of the magic you experienced in your childhood. When I was a kid, I was convinced that I could fly and wouldn’t let anyone tell me otherwise. What improbably hopeful dreams did you have?
It was a common day filled with getting the kids off to school, kissing my husband as he rushed out the door. I could do this in my sleep as the routine had been established years back when we started our family.
It’s a good thing too because my mind was filled with so much more these past days. Don, my husband wanted to take a separate vacation this year. He loved to golf and there was a huge tournament coming up that he had pleaded with me to go along and watch.
Not my cup of tea, I said to him every time he brought the subject up. It was late enough now that my gut was hurting, I had a few more headaches than usual. What was I going to do? I would have to take the kids along, which eliminated those nice visions of lazing on the sunny beaches, being waited on by handsome jocks.
The house was quiet so I rid myself of night-clothes and got dressed. Slapping some make-up on I got my list of errands I had to run. Waving to the snoopy neighbor next door who seemed to use watering her flowers to keep an eye on the neighborhood, I got in my car and took off.
I was driving down the open highway getting ready to take the ramp which would bring me into town when a little fairy appeared on the empty seat beside me. I almost went off the ramp as I blinked twice knowing I was seeing things.
” Hey honey, I hear where you are coming from. Don’t want your hubby to take that separate vacation. Afraid he will see someone more sexy? Well, I suggest you put away those doughnuts and start putting on those weights and do some heavy-duty workouts”.
” Umm, who the hell are you and what right do you have to tell me how I look or how I should live. Of course I am not worried about Don looking elsewhere. We have been married to long and we still have sex once a week”.
The fairy shrugged her shoulders and let out a cackle that made me want to reach over and slap her silly. ” Hey, I just knew I have heard enough. Your conscience is on over-kill so I wanted to get this taken care of before you ruined my own time off”.
” Go on” I said.
” Well it seems to me he wants to play golf because the bloody man finds humor in chasing balls around a big green pasture and you want to ditch your kids for a much-needed break but you know you can’t. So what if I can make you both happy. Would you like that?”
I shook my head in affirmation and let her continue on. ” Let me make it easy on you. I will send a coach for you and the kiddies made out of that beach ball in the back seat. I will send it promptly at midnight. It will be pulled by six white horses which I shall use those sticky, opened suckers laying on the back seat. For a driver I shall drone your husband and he will be the vision that you have of him on those sexy nights you have. I will give the kiddies an invisible fence like they use for dogs and they shall be able to play and run in the sun. For you, I shall give you your own servant for your entire trip. He will look like the guy on that nudie magazine you were looking at earlier this week. You know which one, the one where you kept telling your husband you were just taking a little longer bathing because you wanted to soak”?
I turned my face away from her for just a second as I now knew that my thoughts were not really private. I glanced back at her and was missing some of the conversation she had been saying. ” So lady, how does that sound? Everyone gets their wishes. Everyone has fun”.
” It sounds amazing, but can you really do that?” ” Consider it done”. With a snap of her wand on the top of my nose, she disappeared. I felt calmer, lighter and realized I had to pee real bad now. I stopped at the first business I had to visit and upon entering the front doors asked, ” Do you have a bathroom? I have to go real bad”.
Salted Caramel Mocha Truffles – Shugary Sweets
Gluten Free Condensed Cream of Chicken Soup – Can’t Stay Out Of The Kitchen
Is Life Too Easy?
It seems that there is always inventions made for ways to make life easier. I can remember when my husband and I didn’t own a microwave. When it came out my parents gifted us one for Christmas. How in the world did I heat up the babies bottles? I had to do it the old-fashioned way. I used the stove-top burners. I had to get the pan out, put water in it, turn the burner on and hold the crying baby at the same time until the milk was the right temperature. Wow, how that microwave hurried that process along.
I can remember how I had to stay pretty much in place when I talked on the phone. I had to keep my ears and eyes open with the kids. I wanted to talk but at the same time I could barely keep up with the kids. I think kids realize at a very young age that they are not the main attraction when the phone rings. This is when they choose to get into things, whine and cry, demanding I get off the phone and spend time with them. Thank goodness long and longer phone extension cords were invented.
We have advanced so much and so quick sometimes I can barely keep up with life. It was only a few short years ago that reading an article on how senior citizens didn’t know how to turn a computer on was familiar text. Now, seniors are online, playing games, in chat rooms and dating sites.
What can come next? I wrote about the 3-D printing last week where in our near future, doctors will be able to replace about anything wrong in our bodies by growing an exact duplicate. Will we, our future actually be able to live forever and look like we are 21? The possibilities are definitely there.
So scientists and modern-day technology are really moving faster than we are aging. Life is becoming almost too easy. We are so busy being involved with work, and activities along with trying to attend our kids functions that someone has now invented a new way to make life even easier.
I believe it was in Texas, don’t quote me on that state, that I heard on the late-night news last night that the first drive-thru has been invented. You ask me what country I am residing in? You state with an attitude that drive-thru has been around for years. Well wait a minute, I didn’t get to say what kind of drive-thru. Let me be the first to let you know it is a funeral drive-thru.
You drive up to the window. A sensor can tell by the weight of your car that you are there. This process leads to the heavily clad funeral curtains slide open, causing a full coffin to be in plain view. My gosh, you don’t even have to wear your basic black. You could go in your shorts and tee or maybe your swimsuit. You could visit for your time you wish and then drive off.
Wow, the only thing I have to say about this is, yes it is convenient, but what happens to the loss of respect we pay tribute to of the ones left behind. I guess when you drive away from that window you better have at least a store-bought cake or a box of cookies to drop off to the grieving ones so they don’t feel deserted.
Writing is Healing
After I wrote my post last night about Erasing the Invisible I felt ashamed. Upset with myself for not being like others who are more tough-skinned than me. I didn’t sleep well at all. In fact I was awake and couldn’t fall back asleep at 4am, so I got up, grabbed a cup of coffee and jumped online.
I read with great intent the answers that I received in my comment section about my latest post. The answers were right there in front of me. I just couldn’t see them because I am the one in the middle surrounded by fog.
I am not saying that I am 100% healed, but I did see the fog lift. I understood my pain and the reason for it. All of us most likely go through doubting periods in our lives. It only becomes serious if we don’t work through it, understand it, and become glued in our spot.
Why didn’t I think of it myself? Who knows and what really matters is that I see the light now, thanks to my blogger friends. I feel like I had my very own private session with a therapist without having to sit face to face spilling my guts.
I guess I really never understood grief and how it works. How can one word be so big in emotions. I decided to look up what grief really stands for and this is what I found.
Here is the grief model we call the 7 Stages of Grief:
- SHOCK & DENIAL-
You will probably react to learning of the loss with numbed disbelief. You may deny the reality of the loss at some level, in order to avoid the pain. Shock provides emotional protection from being overwhelmed all at once. This may last for weeks.
- PAIN & GUILT-
As the shock wears off, it is replaced with the suffering of unbelievable pain. Although excruciating and almost unbearable, it is important that you experience the pain fully, and not hide it, avoid it or escape from it with alcohol or drugs.
You may have guilty feelings or remorse over things you did or didn’t do with your loved one. Life feels chaotic and scary during this phase.
- ANGER & BARGAINING-
Frustration gives way to anger, and you may lash out and lay unwarranted blame for the death on someone else. Please try to control this, as permanent damage to your relationships may result. This is a time for the release of bottled up emotion.
You may rail against fate, questioning “Why me?” You may also try to bargain in vain with the powers that be for a way out of your despair (“I will never drink again if you just bring him back”)
- “DEPRESSION”, REFLECTION, LONELINESS-
Just when your friends may think you should be getting on with your life, a long period of sad reflection will likely overtake you. This is a normal stage of grief, so do not be “talked out of it” by well-meaning outsiders. Encouragement from others is not helpful to you during this stage of grieving.
During this time, you finally realize the true magnitude of your loss, and it depresses you. You may isolate yourself on purpose, reflect on things you did with your lost one, and focus on memories of the past. You may sense feelings of emptiness or despair.
More 7 stages of grief…
- THE UPWARD TURN-
As you start to adjust to life without your dear one, your life becomes a little calmer and more organized. Your physical symptoms lessen, and your “depression” begins to lift slightly.
- RECONSTRUCTION & WORKING THROUGH-
As you become more functional, your mind starts working again, and you will find yourself seeking realistic solutions to problems posed by life without your loved one. You will start to work on practical and financial problems and reconstructing yourself and your life without him or her.
- ACCEPTANCE & HOPE-
During this, the last of the seven stages in this grief model, you learn to accept and deal with the reality of your situation. Acceptance does not necessarily mean instant happiness. Given the pain and turmoil you have experienced, you can never return to the carefree, untroubled YOU that existed before this tragedy. But you will find a way forward.
You will start to look forward and actually plan things for the future. Eventually, you will be able to think about your lost loved one without pain; sadness, yes, but the wrenching pain will be gone. You will once again anticipate some good times to come, and yes, even find joy again in the experience of living.
I recognized myself very clear in this list. I am at number 4. I can remember quite well going through number 1, 2 and 3. This seems to be the hardest part I am at right now. I now understand why I get panicky when I leave my house. I get it why I prefer to stay home.
I also know that this is not good for me and for this I am grateful that i still have my senses about me. I didn’t even see that the evil one from below is also having a hay-day with my feelings. He has been taking advantage of me while I have been down and out.
I used to tell myself that I knew my move was a good one because I had prayed and recognized the quick sale of my home and being able to find a new home had to be of God’s doing. Now I know for sure that God knows me so well.
I have to leave here. I do look in the past too much. I do worry about what my family thinks of me and I hate hurting anyone’s feelings, but God knows even more. He knew in order for me to pick myself up and move forward so that he could continue to use me for his will, I needed to move not only away from this home, but also away from the death that lingers inside these walls.
By moving away from seeing Hospice here, the funeral home people coming to get Al, I will now be able to replace those terrible feelings with new visions, new memories and I will be stronger once again.
What this will do for me in the end is move me through the numbers 5, 6, and 7 gaining more strength and able to recognize how Satan works so easily throughout our bad times. I learned a lot through writing that post and for the friends who commented, I say thank-you. Please accept these beautiful flowers as my appreciation gift for what you have shown me.