Excuse me while I tell you about what I was thinking while sitting in the lady’s room on the throne. I know, right? We get some of our best ideas in those little rooms.
I actually was thinking about how Al had struggled all morning with breathing. Nothing looks any different on him, but listening, you can hear changes. Well that thought drifted off to Mom and Dad.
I was wondering how they would feel about the care I give Al. I was going back in time and remembering all the “rules of life” they instilled in us kids.
Now many years later I look at myself and see that I didn’t listen to everything they said.
Some of the rules I can remember getting ground into my head were;
1. Don’t eat with your elbows on the table.
Well I do have excellent manners when I dine out, but here at home, I don’t care as much. Who sees me? Only Al and Rhino and they don’t care as long as I am here.
2. Bedtime is at 10pm. I don’t care what others do, at this house these are my rules.
Well, I have tried to listen to those rules. Only because they are in my mind still, but it doesn’t work. How many times have you went to bed at the proper time and did nothing but lay there and toss and turn? In the morning you feel like you have been ran over by a truck. You feel like crap. What I have learned for me is, go to bed when I am tired, well as long as Al is in bed. If I lose or gain sleep time, my body will generally let me make it up the next evening.
3. Get up early The early bird gets the worm, the late riser gets nothing and shows how lazy he/she is.
I don’t get this at all. I never liked getting up early. Even now I don’t get up as early as Mom and Dad would have. Especially on the weekends. They were always early risers and I didn’t see any worm beds growing in our house.
4. You must put in a hard day’s work every day. You will be happier.
Well I am going to be brutally honest here. Mental work can be quite heavy also. Caring for Al, there are times I would like to lay down and rest before lunch time. Now that I am a little older naps are much more exciting to me then when I was told I had to take one every day; up until the day I started Kindergarten.
5. Don’t chew with your mouth open.
Now this rule I have stuck to. I don’t chew with my mouth open because I don’t want my delicacies falling out and being wasted. Besides, to me, I don’t think it looks appealing.
6. Don’t play across the street with those kids. We don’t know them.
Now here, I don’t agree totally. Yes, there are some warning signs that are obvious to the eye that I may not want to allow my kids to wander the neighborhood. But my Mom and Dad had different reasons and I won’t go into that, as it would be another whole post that I would not care to write about.
I believe that we are a nation under one ceiling. We have different colors, cultures, habits and religions. But God made each of us in his image. I have many friends who are not white like me. I love learning about culture, and I find people in general have at the very least, one fascinating thing about them. All we have to do is look. People in general are loving and want to be loved, just like you and me.
With the times changing it is a pity that now we have to be more careful about viewing the world for what it really is and not what we hope it is. There are more dangers now than when I was being taught by my parents. Let me give you a wide example.
When I was a kid, on Halloween night, paper bags, not plastic, flimsy sacks were used for products. I would take an empty one along with my brother and we would trick-or-treat the whole neighborhood. There was no watching for porch lights on. There were no razors in apples, or sticks of gum with poison in them. It was a fun and innocent night for kids and when we came home our bags were full of goodies. Many time I was eating while trick-or-treating. I didn’t have to wait until I got home and have my candy inspected by parents or x-ray machines.
7. Don’t speak back and never argue with your mate.
Now this one is probably my worst follower in my own life. My parents taught me children are to be seen and not heard. Children should be quiet and sit on chairs. It is no wonder when I was in elementary school I got bad marks on talking out loud. I was finally freed from silence.
I do not agree with not speaking up. It is what has made me so afraid today of voicing my opinions. It has made me sick at heart when I let people run all over me. Forcing their opinions on me when I have my own individual thoughts. I was not allowed to be creative. Thankfully, through writing I am healing on this issue.
I don’t believe in arguing either. I used to, don’t get me wrong. If I thought I was right, I was sticking to it no matter what. Now I have learned, it’s alright to voice my thoughts, and for my mate to say his. When each has spoken a decision to meet in the middle is agreed upon. Two adults conversing like two adults. I would never want a mate to bully me. Beating me, cussing at me, is not the way to treat another human. It is alright to agree to disagree.
So all in all I took what my parents taught me and used what felt right for me. I think they did a pretty good job. Thanks Mom and Dad. for caring enough to teach me.